Always Ally

Always Ally Jul 2019

Why is there so much warmth touching cold nose tips in the frost of the morning;
Pressing foreheads together to share our secrets.
I beckoned you and the winter and we were both waiting for a spring that would never come.
Even if the storm outside raged you left snowflakes; strange, unique, & special.
So precious to want to touch and keep forever but too easy to melt.
We left it all in the cold; preserved and safe. We both walked away taking the warmth and melting with each step.

Always Ally Mar 2019

Are you tired?

Everyone says they're tired.
But what does tired really mean?

Are you tired of feeling ignored?
Are you tired because no matter how hard you try, you're still just not ******* good enough?
Are you tired because you let yourself be vulnerable and you got your heart broken again?
Are you tired of thinking about him even though it's been years and you've moved on?
Are you tired because you don't feel your love being reciprocated the same?
Are you tired about being sick?
Are you tired of being alive?

I've been tired all my life.
I just want to lose myself in my sleep.

#tired

Always Ally Mar 2019

Better

You convince yourself to stay where you are
because you're afraid of wading in waters you don't know.
You believe it won't be better than where you are now,
but you know you're not happy
You deserve better.

You feel ungrateful for what's be given to you,
but you matter too.
Unhappy is unhappy.
Don't let it sit. Don't let it dwell.

You convince yourself that certain things outweigh the others.
The small things matter too.
You're allowed to be upset,
but you'll never allow yourself.
You deserve better.

#thinker #thoughtful #work #relationships #small #things #you #matter

Always Ally Jan 2019

The Screaming

I wish I was important
I wish I felt it deep in my bones
Drop everything important
Here for you, - -actually here for you, important

It’s always at times when I need someone the most that nobody is ever around
“I’m here for you”
But are you?
Words are words
But the words screaming in my head are louder.
They screech their twisted words and dig their claws into my brain.
But you’re here for me right?

I don’t see you though. I don’t feel you. I don’t feel loved. I don’t feel anything. I’m empty except for the screaming.

Always Ally Jan 2019

I

I wish you were here
I was I was a priority

I want to mean something
I wish to fade away gently

I wish I didn’t need things
I want to live less selfishly

Most importantly
I wish I wasn’t here

Always Ally Jan 2019

Lovely, little moments

Lovely, little moments
Feeling that you love me
Knowing that I love you

I found I never was at home
Unless you were there
Putting your arms around me
Lying next to you

This isn’t our beginning
Most certainly not our end
Remember how you confessed you liked me
Remember when I felt the same way about you

Lovely, little moments
Every moment with you

Always Ally Jan 2019

I Fear Me, Dear

And tonight I go to sleep with a heavy heart

Burdened and not wanting to restart

Rest for ages and age bringing death

I fear what comes but I dare not take another breath

Am I ungrateful for a loss that does not outweigh gain

But a heart is a heart that will not easily change

For even a small loss can cause the greatest pain

I fear me, Dear

I’ve gone insane

#heartbreak #sad #relationship #betrayed #cheated #death #heart