one day

you will kiss the love of your life and fall asleep in their arms holding you tight because you finally have each other  

you will wake up late on a sunday to their face and it will be more stunning than the sunrise you missed

you will get dressed, watch them fix their bed head, and think to yourself how lucky you are to have someone so perfect

you will go on adventures and do all of the things you dreamt about

you will come home, to your home together, and get high on the kitchen floor laughing until you can't breathe

you will undress each other and kiss the body you've fallen for

you will lay tangled in blankets and their limbs and drift to sleep, only to do it all again tomorrow

one day
it will be worth it
the fighting, the pain, the break ups and makeups, the confusion, the mess
one day it will all make sense
and one day
you will both be happy

s.s

Cover me in the pigment of your skin,
Trace my flaws with fingertips and watch as they diminish.
Help me find god, I’ll call to him in a quiver-
A prayer laid in your ears, by a gentle whisper.
Snake your arms around my spine as it slithers into shivers.

Twist my frame into a beggar,
“Please, sir, I want some more.”
You’re a giver to the paupers,
Benevolent and adored;

Paint me as many pictures, in many forms
Create something beautiful for others to behold
With your talent and your care, your body and your words.

-SLuR

i.

i used to only write sad poems.

ii.

you see,
i am a cynic,
a cemetery,
a holocaust,
a chaotic, distant, lost girl
buried in her own
self-destruction.

but with you
i am different.

i want to wake up,
keep my promises,
make up for lost time,
spill blood and ink,
try again,
live

for you.

iii.

you walk me home
and the skies blush
pink cloud summers
mid-December.

we part and i marvel
at the sepia tint
of backyard roses
blurring my lenses.

you came in
like the missing palette color
i never knew
i needed
my skies painted with.

iv.

now, you are all the love poems
i didn't know i could write.

and every metaphor i create
is just a lengthier version of
'i love you'

i really do.

one, two, three, four, five
i try to count the amount of tears that fell from my eyes,
but they were uncountable like the raindrops that falls from the sky,
though, i don't know the reason why i cry.

it's always like this every single day,
one moment i'm okay,
then the next second i find myself crying,
it's hard but i'm trying.

i'm trying to find words to describe this unexplainable feeling,
but i always end up finding nothing,
because, the truth is don't even know what i feel,
i don't even know why i'm like this.

sometimes i want people to see through me,
i wish for my friends to see what i really feel,
but it's like they don't even care,
they only tell me it's all gonna be okay.

but words are just words,
sure, they do bring comfort,
though, only for a short amount of time;
i wish they'd do something else other than say those ****** lines.

people don't understand it at all,
it's not just me being sad,
it's not just about me feeling empty;
i wish there were words to describe how i feel.

my heart feels so empty,
and my mind keeps on screaming at me—
telling me that i am useless,
making me feel even more worthless.

please help me,
i'm trying but nothing seems to be working,
and at the end of the day i always find myself crying,
wishing i was anything but unhappy.

—l.a.