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Shock to my heart,
Torn all apart,
Still, I can't see,
A better place to be.

Won't somebody come
And save me from myself.
Won't somebody come,
I can't make it by myself.

Trapped by my fears
In my waisted years.
I've searched my soul to find
Some sense of peace of mind.

Won't somebody come
And save me from myself.
Won't sombedy come
I can't make it by myself.

All, all alone.
Never to feel at home.
Why do I feel this way?
Make it all go away...

search on,
for something I won't own
Search, I'm searching on
I'm searching on.
another set of lyrics I wrote in 1998 on an accustic guitar I bought. I  was feeling very Lyndsy Buckingham. I don't think my work in these days was very good, but it came from a raw place. Obviously, I survived all that aingst and fear.
Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow—
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream:
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand—
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep
While I weep—while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
 Jun 2015 Addison Grant Drew
caja
you cut holes in your sweaters
and stick your thumbs inside
and color your nails with markers
like koi in a meadow of fairy moss
you eat the words straight off the paper of your favorite novel
you don't wear shoes
your knees are bruisy
and i watch you taste literature
like it's your last meal
Guaranteed satisfaction
Limited supply
Get it fast - run!
Our sale ends
In 30 seconds
Trample your neighbor
And buy the best one
Bend over
And check it out
Head to the register
And we'll apply the discount
We promise
~                                              Preaching hate
        The audacity
                                   To say
                              in gods name
                                                          T­hat yours
    is the only truth
                                That way
                             *Lies madness
Does this hurt?*
Yes.

It hurts like seeing your
Childhood home for the last time.

Nothing stings like your skin catching
Sparks from a bridge burning,

Like resting scalpel on chest and
Sliding to access the heartful of

Thorns, then changing to tools of
Extraction.

What am I doing here, would be
The last words they'd watch me

Think. Now I remain with the
Question, eyes turned to where I'd

Like to see Heaven holding divine
Wisdom and offering it,

Getting nothing but rain in my eyes
And silence.

All homes are temporary.
The smell of lilac floating down

The street will always take me back
To when that bridge connected one heart

Set on forever to one set on for now.
I run the tips of my fingers across

The scar of scalpel; a map from Death to
Life; lying flatline;

Temporary, temporary rest.
I was never meant to stay, I whisper

Into what I know is coming.
Will this hurt?

Yes.
*Good.
The ladder is so simple.
It is used
to climb
to see the heavens.

The ladder is so simple.
With a grasp of its outer shell
Man
can
slip
                       away
without
a
sound.

The ladder is so simple.
But it requires such effort to move upwards
Each rung requires a jump from the previous.
A leap of faith-
Ending in the starting place with no new vertical accomplishments
OR
Continuing with a crash on the next, elevated rung,
Repeating the process once again.

                Then there’s the other option.
                To grasp the sides of the ladder when man has finished climbing,
                Slinking, slithering down the smooth sides of the legs
                Where you smack the bottom.

The ladder is so simple.
It’s easy for man to climb.
Each rung is a new goal to reach.
There’s a constant need to land on top
like a nobleman chasing the crown.

               The hard part is saying goodbye to the heights achieved.
               “Are the rungs pointless if man should pass them all coming back                        down?”
“Are the leaps of faith worth the energy in the end?”
But the hardest question of all-

*“When does man know to sink?”
I fell
I slept
And wished
Upon an astral projection
My state was not that of lucidity
But rather, it was that of harmony
Connectivity
Intertwining with the weaves and sinews and basket-like patterns
That are the universe
Our minds
Forming a collective soul
A collective consciousness
One
Everyone seeing the same projection
In completely different realities
I fell
I slept
I saw
One
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