Why must I write?
When there's so much better,
Prose, poetry, free styling words,
So much more elaborate,
So beautifully knit together,
While I create patchworks of rhymes, and reason,
This silence would ****,
This inability to express to people,
Because paper patiently listens,
Because this desire-less life feels a little lived when pen meets paper,
But I don't write in ink,
Charcoal let's me rethink,
Who knows what's going to happen next,
And if you did, what would you really do differently?
Can you escape yourself?
Wherever you go, there you are

Those words that almost killed me
Left my heart with deep wounds
Don't know when will it heal
Broken heart, puffy eyes
Cried till eyes worn out.

I've changed because of you.
So much about me has changed.
I'm not even sure who I was before I had you.
I'm not even sure if I want to be her again.
I've grown so confident.
So calm.
I've developed patience and honesty.
I know who I am, and have accepted myself.
I enduldge in the things I love and don't hide what those things are.
I've matured and learned how to love in a truly healthy way.
I no longer rely on others.
I don't need someone in my life to take care of me any longer.
Though just because I don't need doesn't mean I don't want.
I can't imagine living through a day without talking to you.
Without proving how much I love you and want you in my life.
You're apart of every part of my world.
Everything about the person I've become has been supported by you.
I want to live the rest of my life spending everyday being influenced by you.
Maturing with you.
Changing with you.
Being in love with you.

However I've lost you..
The one constant I will never want to give up.
I just pray that one day I'll get you back.
The world dulls more and more each day without you by my side.

It won't go away
I need help
There's no solution
It's like a virus
Spreads all over
The shaking that won't stop
It won't go away