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  Apr 2019 Bones
Dark Smile
Because when I was 4, my mom told me that I could not like blue because it was a 'boy' colour.  
Because when I was 5, the kids at kindergarten made fun of me for my 'boy' hairstyle.
Because when I was 6, dad refused to buy me a toy car because it is a 'boy' toy. He got me a Barbie doll. 'Good for girls,' he said.
Because when I was 7, my teacher scolded my for my 'boy' handwriting.
Because when I was 8,after a bad fall, my mom lamented that I would never be able to wear a skirt, instead of asking if I was ok.
Because when I was 9 I watched as my relatives mocked my male cousin for cooking. "Leave it to the women" they said.
Because when I was 10, I was told that I ran like a girl. 'But I am a girl', I said. They laughed at my innocence.
Because when I was 11, I was warned my my mother that I would be too fat to be loved. As though his love had to be spread all over my fats.
Because when I was 12, puberty started and the acne set in. It was my mom's worst nightmare.
Because when I was 13, my mom reemphasised that I was too fat to be loved. I felt like ****.
Because when I was 14, I starved myself so that I would be beautiful. I did look like a 'proper girl', my parents agreed.
Because when I was 15, the stress of impending national exams got to me and my hair started to fall out. My mom prayed for my soul, and my scalp.
Because when I was 16, in the car 37 minutes ago. My mom scolded me for my acne scars, saying that I was too scarred to ever get a job, or a husband. Most importantly a husband.
Because gender roles affect us all, male or female. Stop labelling people.
Bones Apr 2019
I didn’t wanna tell
I didn’t want to break it
But my love went down the well
And I can’t ever recover it
Bones Apr 2019
I’m drowning in a small room
Walls closing in on me
I used to love this place
Now it’s a prison
Of love and hate
You’re the poison in my bones
You’re the glue holding me together
But you left me alone
And I fell apart
No solutions
I feel so
Empty
Bones Apr 2019
Every day is pointless
Unless someone wants me there
Bones Apr 2019
I fell in the mud today
I wish I would have just sunk into it
Bones Apr 2019
Sea
Thus I lie down in the ocean
Waves of cool roaring almightly
Caressing me is the sea
Bones Apr 2019
Within a container
I poured my hate
Within a container
I poured you away
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