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Alexis K Nov 2021
I'm sorry I can't help your depression
But I'm dealing with mine.
Alexis K Aug 2019
Fifteen years old and pregnant
Just a child yourself.
Your big doe eyes wide
As you proclaim you’re doing what’s right.  

God will help you
He will lead the way.
This baby being brought to us
Will be in good hands.
For it’s not just a child
But soon to be grandmother and aunt
Alexis K Mar 2021
I wish you could see you the way I see you.
The way I see your eyes light up with excitement.
The way you smile naturally.
The warmth that radiates from your love.
I wish you could see you the way I see you.
Because then you could see the many reasons why.
Why I love you.
Alexis K Oct 2023
I wonder if I'm loved enough for my partners to even know this account matters.
Alexis K Apr 2024
Should sting.
They should make you want to crawl out of your flesh prison.
They shouldn't be flowery.
Nor sweet, simple, and easy to read.

My words bite at your arm,
Like the truth of society burns your eyes.
These words are the venom in my bones.
T H I S  I S  M Y  P A I N
Feel it as deep as I was forced to at 8.

This is the truth.
My words may never be full of light.
But the world holds a flashlight,
And pretends that they can see.
I may be 'deranged'
But  a  t    l e  a s  t
I
C          A        N
S        e       e
Alexis K Nov 2023
Crashing against the rocks.
                Washing away the sand.
                             Weathering it to glass.

Depression is like waves.
                  And I am already glass.
I am tired today.
Alexis K May 2021
I am so inexplicably scared for what lies ahead.
This is too specific of a dread.
What I do not know could **** me,
Yet I don't have a clue what I don't know.

I am sorry.
I can't imagine what my life could be.
Let alone what it looks with both you and me.
Alexis K Jun 2024
My brain just keeps going.
I always try to sleep.
For if I'm awake,
I fear my brain will make me disappear.
Alexis K Aug 2023
When despair is too much.
When life is too heavy.
And asking for help is impossible.
Where can I hide?

I can ask for what I don't know.
I don't know how to help me.
And you don't see me crying right in front of you.
So this is where I hide.

Where I can write when words are too hard.
Where I can exist in silence.

Even though I want to be held.
Alexis K Jul 2024
I've never felt more whole,
Than with you in my life.
Without him I'd have no idea how to survive.
Without her I'd have no idea how to live.
I wouldn't trade them for the world.
With them both,
I might be whole and healed.
Alexis K Jan 2024
Because there's
Fire along my skin.
Ice shards in my lungs.
War in my head.
I've anvils for feet.
Air feels like water.
I'm drowning, unable to move.
Paralyzed in life.
"Guess I didn't sleep well again."
Alexis K Sep 2019
When did I get so old?
Too old to kiss my mom on the lips??
Too old to tell my sister I love her???
Too old to even hug her????
When did I get so old?????
So old my back kills me??????
So old my knees buckle???????
So old I’m losing my thoughts,
As if my cards are constantly being shuffled.
Why did I have to grow?
Alexis K Jul 2024
I've only got a few.
1. Nobody cared about me.
2. Death.

If 1 came true, two would be easy, guilt-less.

Since they can't come true I've got a new one.
3. I felt loved the way I love.
But to my dismay, my wishes can't come true.
You
Alexis K Jun 2018
You
With the sky a beautiful grey-blue
I only admire you

Even the sun, a burning brass
And the simplest beauty in blades of grass
I can only wish to get to you fast

In the nights when trees sway and thrash
I can only hope our time to last

— The End —