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 Mar 2015 Bra-Tee
Mr X
Thank darkness
Because it shows you light.

Thank sadness
Because it shows you mirth.

Thank sickness
Because it shows you health.

Thank death
Because it shows you life.
T'would seem that the most unhappy people are they who cannot stop worrying about how others perceive them long enough to be themselves.
 Mar 2015 Bra-Tee
Kelly Nolan
loneliness lays in the back of
his car in a stranded parking lot
with a *** stained blanket in the backseat.
he hasn’t noticed that i can’t look him in the eye.
hes too busy enjoying himself.


depression sits on cushion chair in
mr burnside's office,
watching him fiddle with his tie
with a worried look on his face,
as if he would say the wrong thing
and i would fall apart right before his eyes.
“you been wearing that sweatshirt all day?”
yes.
“lift up your sleeves”
no.


anxiety takes a daily trip to the nurses office.
i’m okay, i just don’t feel well.
“here’s a mint, try to go back to class”.
oh great, a ******* mint. i feel better already


hopelessness is curled up in a ball on
the bathroom floor
with the door locked. i can’t hear
my mom yell at me anymore
about how i have no direction,
how i need to try harder,
be better,
go to the gym.


abandonment walks outside at
2 in the morning with no shoes on,
-9 degree wind chill nipping at her toes.
i am crying too hard.
please don’t leave me
is all that echoes in my brain.

teen angst rolls her eyes at ms allen
“im worried about you”
one minute,
the next minute embarrassing me in front of the whole class.
I don’t know how to ******* graph an exponential function
because i spent my night at bethesda north
answering the nurses questions.
“how many pills did you take?”
“are you okay to go home tonight?”
“how long have you been dealing with depression?”


this high school is supposed to look
like a castle.
that makes me laugh.
not once since i’ve been here have i felt like a queen.
 Mar 2015 Bra-Tee
Kelly Nolan
I am alright
is what I say even when I have flashbacks everyday of the intimidating looking paramedic carrying me into the ambulance car as if I’m shattered porcelain.

We’re alright
is what my mom says even when she leaves the house she constantly calls and when we aren’t in the same room she repeats “Kelly? Just making sure you’re alright”.

I am alright
is what I say even when I have to look away when the clock strikes 9:27 am because that’s when everything suddenly went black and then spotted white.

We’re alright
is what my mom says, a single parent paying MRI scans, emergency room bills, antiseizure medication, the neurologist, the neurosurgeon, the epileptic neurosurgeon, without a cent from my father, and her worry lines are piercingly more clear to me.

Does anyone really wanna hear the truth?
I rub my fingers across my head imagining ripping out the millions of neurons lighting paths across my brain. Maybe then I wouldn’t have to worry anymore.

I’ve kept my mouth shut because it’s polite but I want to tell everyone who’s pretending to be my friend because they feel sorry for me to ******* because my health is none of their business.

It all catches up to me when I sit in the hallway at Cincinnati Children’s and I watch kids with tubes down their noses and needles in their arms and think to myself:
I can’t be one of them, can I?
This can’t be real, can it?
But I guess I’m alright.

The meds make me feel foggy, like I’m somewhere between awake and asleep.
Where my mind feels like it fell through a trapdoor and into a vacuum.

If it was up to me I wouldn’t leave the house. The only places I feel safe are in the nurses office or in between the 4 walls of a hospital with my mom holding my hand.
That’s what seizures do. Turn an 18 year old girl into a 5 year old, wanting to run in a closet and slam the door so nobody has to see it happen again.

No going down stairs alone, no locking the door when showering, no getting drunk at parties, no driving, no living your life.

So you wonder if I’m alright? If alright means seeing my mom cry for the first time in years, if alright means sleeping 3 hours a night, if alright means having to rely on others because I can’t do anything by myself..
Maybe I’m tired of lying.
Maybe I’m not alright.
 Mar 2015 Bra-Tee
NeroameeAlucard
You are what you are
no bypassing the issue
And if you force change on someone
the issue is you

we all were created to be something
from the addicts to the presidents
for those that may be wondering
hopeless nerds and the awkward
are who I represent

Me? I'm a hardened cynical writing fiend
inking and abusing pages like schoolly D when he asked, P.S.K. what does it mean
you won't find this engrossing
as I'm prone to bouts of vicious self loathing

You? well clearly you must like what I write
I personally don't see why but hey that's alright
but then you always are your own worst critic
So even though I may think I'm dumber than a post tied to a box of rocks
you may see something different

Bottom line is, we all are something unique and strange
because of this humans should try to engage
the idea of being loving and not war hungry ******
because who know how long we have until the final curtain call
And when the author's pen makes that last click
 Mar 2015 Bra-Tee
Christian Ek
Your a jaw breaker candy because you dropped my jaw.
My head spinned back like an owl as you circled me.
Long nails tingling down my spine.
A voice that could ****** any wild animal into submission.
Her body heat made me sweat.
Her intimidating attitude was ****.
Her reading glasses foggy.
Her coffee breath wasn't off putting but rather enticing.
She was a blue moon and i was howling for her, I was bound by her power.
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