the reflection back
doesn't reflect how I feel
when my phone rang
and you answered and said
"you're my everything,
my one and only"
my heart wasn't hard to steal
peace of mind from what you told me
folded the papers
which were notes you wrote me
but with you, I still felt lonely
then came the day
you texted me to say hey
but I knew things were shaking
inside your head a storm erupted
tried to ask but you spoke nothing
days went by
everyday I cried
worried for you
still had no clue
what was running through your mind
you could see the future
as I stood back blind
finally you had the urge to text me
and I died a little inside
when I read the message that said
you didn't want to be mine
I know you feel trapped
stuck in a religious war
you seek to escape your life
a religious thunderstorm
I can't even imagine
a life full of control
can't create your own path
or own story to be told
and I was foolish to think
that we could stay together and grow old
almost as foolish as a candle shining
outside when it starts to snow
or thinking we were on the same page
or that all your thoughts were made known
and you liked me but still tried to mold me
into something I could never be
transformed my thoughts into ones less happy
but I wasn't happy because I wasn't the old me
and you no longer cared for me
cause I went against what you told me
I didn't let you manipulate and fold me
and I no longer loved you fully
I became your dreaded past
you became my bully
and at night I have thoughts
that always rush through me
they keep me up at times I know they shouldn't
so hard to sleep when you feel so foolish
you shot the gun
and I bit the bullet
at times I considered your words deadly
now lately you've been dead to me
constantly talking and always complaining
I was slowly becoming the negativity
you tried to make me
but I still wish I had the chance to express myself
many things I could tell you
things that would provide help
I would have so many things to tell you
and so many things to say
but the first question I'd ask is:
"why do you make me feel this way?"

She’s more fun when she is drunk
At least…until she’s not
Because she’s puking in the toilet
And regretting her last shot

She’s more confident when she’s drunk
Gorgeous and ready to score
Until she looks in a mirror
And feels even uglier than before

She likes herself more when she is drunk
Until that feeling goes away
When she is so far beyond gone
That her self-hatred comes out to play

She’s happier when she’s drunk
All her issues leave her brain
But they all come crashing back at once
And cause her so much pain

She likes the world more when drunk
It’s filled with so much good
Until one little thing sets her off
And she hates it all more than she should

She likes life more when she’s drunk
Her mind for once feels still
Terrified of losing that feeling
She soon wants to end things with a pill

But she can stop any time she wants
Or so she’d have you believe
Because alcohol makes her seem so happy
That is, until all her friends leave

I hear pounding on my head
When will it stop Bam,Klang,Boom they need to be ****** dead

I can't stand this pain
It's driving me insane

Keep poppin those pain pills
Still my head feels like it's being drilled

It's the demons trying to get in
I keep telling myself don't let them win

Run, hide, fight, or should I flight
I choose to stand up and fight

Your not coming in to rearrange me
You don't have the master key

I have more angels in my head
demons you have been misled

I was stuck in slimy goo pulling me lower and lower
I start to float up higher and higher

My angels begin to sing
And surround my brain

As the angels sing louder
The banging becomes softer

I begin to feel free again
Like a weight has been lifted

The angels begin to spin me around
The demons begin to fall off my head going straight to hell

The more I spin and hear the angels sing
I'm coming back into myself free of evil

I hold you tight up against my body
I take you with me even to the party

I rub you back and forth
Up and down from south to north

I love the way you sing hard and soft
I just can't keep my hands off

I pull you close
From coast to coast

You are beautifully sound
I will never pass you around

Magnificently perfect
You have all of my respect

You are my best friend
Till the end