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JSL Oct 2014
I can't touch you,
a fire so content lives on all your parts.
You looked at me and even said
"I'll burn your heart"
the light, the heat, I am complete.
406 · Jan 2019
Noct-ache
JSL Jan 2019
My heart woke me up crying.
Poor thing.
To T.
JSL Feb 2015
and when he left me my world turned upside down and knew only of chaos and i had to fight to survive in a body with a heart and mind that tries to die.
Cody did that.
JSL Dec 2014
You were specific in the way you wanted me killed
But I also have my own specifics:

**** me with the care you never gave
Bath me in the tender torture I longed for
Put the weight of forever on me
Look at me and say "I will burn your heart"
Break all my bones, make me feel hollow right in my middle
Heal me to death
Lie to me with venom and leave it unattended
Become my hero of hurt and tell me how ugly my kind of greed is
Promise me the beauty of depths, death and your whispers that I never get to hear because you're never close enough
Knife me with nothing and let me bleed with everything
Love me.
I like how carefully he's killing me, but I have my own method of endings.
363 · Apr 2019
Praedari
JSL Apr 2019
I don't think you understand how stunning I am as a predator. I sleep on the ocean so cruelly and fierce, it kissed me and left.
T.
360 · Feb 2017
Death and I
JSL Feb 2017
I can't be beautiful in happiness.
Because I can only love Death;
and, O, my gentle, you don't **** me.
Michael wanted a poem.
351 · Oct 2019
Maybe If.
JSL Oct 2019
Maybe if you didn't have a bad sleep?
Maybe if I had wore a different jumper?
Maybe if you liked your coffee differently?
Maybe if I didn't listen like that?
Maybe if we didn't get into the National Gallery for free?
Maybe if I was less interested in the Terracotta Warriors?
Or more? Or if I didn't miss you pointing out that ***?
Maybe if you weren't in a relationship.
Maybe if I wanted one.
Maybe if you also ordered the ceviche? You nearly did.
Maybe if I drank gin neatly?
Maybe if you wanted me, like you said you would?
Maybe if I wasn't so greedy for the romanticisation?
Maybe if you didn't think I would break this beautifully?
Maybe if I didn't think I would break this beautifully?
Maybe if.
To Shannon. Keep it going, don't let it die.
290 · Aug 2018
2.
JSL Aug 2018
2.
Beautiful and lonely,
brilliantly both.
To James
223 · Jan 2019
Earth's cry
JSL Jan 2019
And I've been weak, and I'm so sharp.
And I'll love you into oblivion,
And you will tremble.
T
214 · Jan 2019
Seppuku
JSL Jan 2019
Time killed itself so it can be with you.
Time stop to exist around you T.
202 · Oct 2019
.
JSL Oct 2019
.
My heart is a weapon.
To all my boys.
196 · Oct 2019
Closer to Grey
JSL Oct 2019
The red rumours of your ocean lips,
And the infinities in your eyes.
Your softness, and your power
To stop Earth's old and weary cries.
The fetish, the chase, the hunt, the high.
And I thought this was how I die.

Alas, you were never close enough for even a whisper.
And, I shall grow old, and this is all I'll ever know.
Not a taste of the years I would have given you.
Not a laugh once more.
I sighed.
To Shannon. I curated it too perfectly.
JSL Nov 2019
I've built a house for me and him. We both loved the ocean so naturally our nest was always going to be water bound. A sharp house of Japanese cypress, with a metallic accent, and minimalistic in style to mirror the en vogue interior trend. We have a library together, which you've coordinated according to size even though I liked your previous system better - arranged by colours! The kitchen was the heart, I always cooked for you, and you ate with an efficiency and joy that could only be described as a talent - that made me more full than the food ever did. Summer was my favourite; salty hair, and sun-kissed skin (Also! The taste of sugar plums always benefited from the seasoning of the heat). The languor of us watching each sunset became so safe for me, and I felt as warm as the red wine we drank, and I think everything was perfect, and you were what I needed.

But don't look too closely,
I'm scared
You'll see that our bed is too neat.
From the fact that
He has never slept here
With me
In this house
That I've built
For us.
To Shannon.

— The End —