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SteffyWeffy Aug 2016
I went to the house, for the first time in months.
I had spent so many hours here.
This felt like home, this is where my heart was at.
I wasn’t supposed to be here; my parents would get mad.
I wanted to see them though.
My aunt, my uncle, my cousins.
I didn’t want it to end, I walked through the house looking at everything.
I saw the vase I made my aunt.
I saw pictures of me when I was younger.
My cousin and I played basketball.
I watched my uncle watch football.
I talked to my oldest cousin.
I memorized the house before I left.
I don’t know when I will see you all again.
I love you so much.
SteffyWeffy Aug 2016
I don’t want to miss you today, I wanted today to be a good day.
Missing you drains me, I cry when I think about you.
Why couldn’t things work out?
I’m sorry things couldn’t have been different.
I’m listening to the song that reminds me of you.
I didn’t want to hear this song; I didn’t want to think about you today.
Pamela (Pam) is my birth mom.
When she started school she wanted to be a firefighter
Until she felt the sting of the fireplace.
When she was 7 she wanted to be a florist
But found hay fever unbearable.
When she was 10 she wanted to be a nurse
Until she was diagnosed
and had to go to hospital too much.
When she was 12 she wanted to be a hairdresser
But had no hair left to dress.
When she was 13 she wanted to be a pilot and see the world,
By the time she was 15 she had her heart set on it
Until she heard the bad news and decided peace was all she wanted.
By her 16th birthday her long battle had been lost
So she became an
angel
SteffyWeffy Aug 2016
Say something.
Speak up, you have a voice don’t you?
Doesn’t anyone want to listen to you?
You are lovely, can’t you see that?

Broken heart.
My dad.
Lost love.
Self-harm.
Making things ok with my mother.
Seeing my cousins grow up.

None of this matters now.
I’m tired of living, maybe I should die.
  Aug 2016 SteffyWeffy
Akira Chinen
I like pens that bleed
Ink that smears
Girls with scars
Broken parts
***** clothes
Stained sheets
The hint of blood
The taste of lust
The smells of love
Nights through morning
Mornings to night
Suns that sleep
Moons that dream
And all the pretty
You hide underneath
Those pretty
Pretty
Pretty things
  Aug 2016 SteffyWeffy
Anita Daniel
Let me tell you a few things about me.
I used to be the insecure one
Felt ugly and worthless
That I am not of this world
Have brains no looks
Didn't put effort in designer clothes

People would tell me that I'm beautiful
I'd smile and say to myself they just try to make me feel better
I doubt the mirror too
Being picked on by bigger kids ruined my self-esteem

Then I started reading books. Taking pictures
"Dressing up" still felt ugly
Boys would come and ask me out
I felt they made bets with their friends

Now I am not afraid anymore
I have decided to embrace my uniqueness
I dress up and attend self discovery  events
I feel beautiful haha I am beautiful
Always have been

I am not afraid anymore

I walk confidently
The ground is made of gold
I am an enchantress
Never doubt yourself. You are beautiful. Love yourself. Nobody has to confirm whether you are beautiful or not. Even the mirror agrees that you are an enchantress. Keep that chin up.
  Aug 2016 SteffyWeffy
Rj
No ones on this site anymore

I need to get out of this bed
This room
This house
This town
This state
My own mind
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