I drown,
In the depths of your eyes
I should feel shame
But to say it is a lie
I'm lost in your touch,
The smell of your skin
With you,
Hell is worth our sin
To taste your lips,
Breathe your breath
I would die
A thousand deaths
I will stand at Hells gates
And smile passing through
Just to know
I'll burn with you

T'was the night before Christmas
The gifts were all wrapped
When the smell, well...it hit me
Our new puppy had crapped

I knew I could smell it
It was not just a ****
The puppy had dropped one
I awoke with a start

I could hear a slight rustle
As he went to his bed
But, the smell made me nauseous
And it turned my eyes red

I could hear a slight jingle
From the dog tags he wore
It was then that I found it
In the hall, by the door

I had not put on slippers
I had not hit the light
I just hope I could see it
Try as I might

But, as puppy bombs go
this was one for the ages
It had started out loose
And had grown in three stages

My foot found it first
And before I could halt
It was between my toes
And it wasn't his fault

If I'd turned on the light
I'd have seen it, no sweat
But, now, I was hopping
With a foot, brown and wet

I was off to the bathroom
Hopping mad, so to speak
when from out of my bedroom
I heard "What's that reek?"

It was worse than it started
Now, I'd helped it along
It was me, now in trouble
And somehow, that was wrong

Down in the kitchen
I could hear the dog snore
While, I was still hopping
On one foot by the door

My wife, said "go shower"
And clean up the rug
I hopped to the bathroom
And sat down, with a shrug

It was the night before Christmas
I should be out like a log
But, this is my life
Because I own a dog....

Did you know that dogs
In their natural state
Never bark?
That we gave their sprogs
Such an acquired trait
For a lark?

They would whine and growl
If they were left alone
To be free,
A dog will even howl
But won't bark on its own
Naturally.