You're in love with her.
She's the kind of soft that makes the sun fall to its knees every evening just to get a closer glimpse.
She's everything that makes a boy believe in god.
How else could he be alive at the same time as her if he didn't?
The odds are too great for there to be any other reason that he gets to make her smile.
That kind of smile that's designed to melt boys like him that i've turned cold.
You thought I was her once.
Speaking of thoughts, do I ever cross your mind sometimes like you cross mine? Even if unintentional?
At night I accidentally love you like no time has passed.
I know it's just my unconscious mind, but while I sleep there's a version of you that loves me still.
You're a dream that I wish wasn't.
So it's the worst kind of accident you could say.
Maybe not accidental if gods real like you believe he is.
My dreams might possibly just be his way of saying "*******".

Mysterious eyes
lead the way
met the man
knew not what to say.

You cannot call it love
for we have never met
your eyes fill with disdain
and mine with respect.

Just another girl in love
this is all you think of me
but close those mysterious eyes
only then shall you really see!

I was always more scared of being abandoned than I was of being destroyed.

If I were short
On Love
Would you care?

Would you like me to keep checking in everyday, or less so? I know that it gets annoying sometimes. I don't know. It's such a struggle to communicate how I feel. I don't know how to express myself. My thoughts. The constant battle within my head. Just let me know, y'know? If I'm getting over-the-top, just tell me to cut it out. I apologize. I'm sorry if I take things too far. It's just my paranoia. My overthinking. My social anxiety. My fear of being alone, yet that desire to just be left alone. I don't know. Everything's just so overwhelming. Sometimes, I check in, and hope that you'd do the same, but if you're busy, it's okay, I guess. I don't know. Life is just a struggle, y'know? The struggle to just be -- to move, and think, and speak, and breathe, and just process everything. Sometimes, it's like I just want to be done with life. Done with everything. And I just don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. I want to say something, but I can't. You know? I want to say that I'll be there for you, or that I have certain feelings for you, or that I care for you, or that I wholeheartedly want the best for you. But I just can't. There's a setback in my mind that backfires everything. I don't know anymore. Just let me know that you want me to stop checking in, or not so often. I'm sorry in advance, I guess. That fear of social approval and social judgement, and just not being good enough. It's just so hard to see what's right or wrong in a certain context or circumstance. If I act aggressive or suicidal, I'm sorry for making your life difficult. It's just hard to be. You know, sometimes, I feel like no one really sees me. It's like I'm invisible. I feel like I'm so alone. Like I know I have friends, but it's like they're so busy, and I don't wanna be a bother to them. I'm sorry if I am. I'm sorry if I failed your expectations. I'm sorry if I wasn't there for you. Because you're all I really have. And I just want the best for you.