forget to tell her goodnight
after you have
made her cry,
she probably cried in her dark bedroom all alone
while she held her childhood teddy bear
close to her chest

tell her that it's all in her head
and that she is overreacting
when she is starting to break down
and tell her to stop when she starts
having problems getting air into her lungs

tell her you'll call her,
but instead go out and party all night
and make out with random strangers
who you find attractive in your drunken haze

You fit into my thoughts like your poems fit in my pocket...

Delightfully comfortable.

I could write you a list so long, outlining all my flaws.

You call me beautiful and I can almost see it.

Hands could intertwine and it could be so wonderful..

But you'd have to get to know me.

Walls could come down...

But you'd get to close.

It could be wonderful for awhile.

Bodies tangled and laughter filling our hearts.

But I get scared so easily.

You are a masterpiece...

I'm resisting the impulse to run as emotions take me.

But I know an absence of you would always linger in-between if I did.

All I know at this moment..

Is I couldn't stand for "us" to be another broken memory along the floor.

But how could that be possible when I'm so consumed with thoughts of you.

1/6/09

Liquid *******!
rigged outfitters
folkstar [protected post]
I sit in a crowd of people, I don't know which ones to trust.
I sit beside her, but look away, and dissapear into the dust.
Her expressions are animated, and her look is pensive.
She talks right to me, but it's always so defensive.
I try to hide my thoughts, and I stare blankly into space.
But everything's forgotton with that look upon her face.
Will last year come back, and will love repeat itself?
This hope in a bottle, sits neatly on a shelf.
I'll have a drink, if you'll share one with me...
I'll give you love, if you'll share love with me...

I cry in secret,
silent sobs shake me.
Tears roll quietly
and    fall    wasted around me.
Leaving a taste of disdain from showing weakness.

I resent what you have made me become.
You can beat me
damage me with your words     and      hands.
Ill never expose the impact of you
c r u s h i n g    me.

I cry
In secret
quiet sobs shake me.
You will never have the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Or the realization of how badly
you     have     broken
me into pieces.

I whisper your name to myself,
and it puts this smile on my lips that's hard to wash away.
This feeling that's come over me,
Is so very warm.
It spreads with delight from the top of my head,
to the very tips of my toes.

I'm tangled in words and emotions, thoughts spin out of control. Hypnotising me in endless day dreams. Possibilities as countless as heart beats.

You must be my new fascination.
I'm beginning to settle in,
becoming to comfortable in your thoughts.
I wonder how good your lips might taste touching mine,
How your body might feel under my touch.


Lay me down,
Let me belong to you.
Just don't let me fade away...
I crave to be more then an indent on your bed sheets.
This time,
I want more then a once whispered name.

When I was in the third grade
I made a list of things you could do
To someone you like.

My mom found it
And gave me the talk
And said, "I don't buy you these journals so you can write things like this."

I still write things like that but
I buy my own journals now.