Never once did I say I love you
the words always rose in the back of my throat
but never passed through my lips
something about them just didn't fit
It seemed, cheasy
almost fake
as if saying I loved her
would put my life at stake,
and thinking about it,
it probably would
I didn't know her that well
and we weren't exactly dating
in fact,
she probably didn't even like me
but I did, indeed
love her
but never once did the words leave my lips
because I learned from pass experiences
that when you say it
everything from there goes down hill
so never once did I say I love you
and I don't regret it
because I lost her either way
but this way I have nothing to miss

A puzzle is easy to take apart but hard to put together
The bigger the puzzle the more frustrating it gets
And sometimes we give up on the challenge

I am a puzzle
A one thousand piece puzzle

I gave up on putting myself back together
Too many missing pieces
Too hard of a challenge

I trusted you.
That's really the gist of it.
That's why this won't go away.
I let many people into my life
Good and bad
Strong and weak
Tender and cold
But I trust so few.
Even those who deserve it
Even those who prove their loyalty
I trust
So few.
I trusted you.
I trusted you.
I think my trust must carry venom
And poison the people I bestow it on
Because you are not cruel.
Not you.
You are not sudden like the strike of a cobra.
You are not cold like ice.
Not you.

None of them were.
None of them ever were before they were
To me.

(Rage more.)

The truth is that I still trust you.
The truth is that I laugh when you say something funny to someone else and your face lights up,
And smile when you get what you want,
And wish you well whenever I look at you.
The truth is that I can't help it.

All I am is sad even though I try
I try so hard
To be angry at you for hurting me.
For hurting me and turning away
As if that helps anything.
For throwing your hands up at the first sign that perhaps
When I told you over and over that you had my trust
I meant it.
And that perhaps
You broke it.
And that perhaps
You might contribute to the storm that is me, well-
You've always stood for storms before
And let them reach your heart.
And you will stand for mine.
The day you didn't leave when I gave you your first chance
Was the day you chose to influence my heart and soul
My self worth
My happiness.
It is a choice I warn everyone not to make lightly.
It is a choice that few understand until they regret having made it.
You like the rain, darling?
You like
The thunder?
Rage MORE-
There is a hurricane in my blood
Every cell
Swirling and savage
And you
You stirred it up
You made it scalding sweet-
And you of all people
You who've seen so very many
Should know that there is no halting
A storm.
No fleeing from it.
No reasoning with it,
And no
Abandoning it.
I trusted you.
I
Trusted
You.

Rage more.

There's nothing more romantic
          in my eyes
        Than holding your hand
   And talking about our lives
          Because in my mind
The only thing better than the fantasy
        Is the intimacy I feel
  When it's just you and me
            *connecting