I am making a video game,
a chatting game,
conversations are familiar and same,
you get to talk to me,
Save me from shadows chasing me,
running towards a changing exit,
get to the exit and a decision awaits,
There is a deeper meaning to it,
To do the right thing as a human,
or the right thing someone else wants,
and then the game ends.

I... Just need a friend,
I just want the loneliness to end,
I just want my life.....
To end.

2 and half days I have been high,
Went to an internship interview high,
I woke up that day and smoked,
Told everyone bye,
And walked out feeling stoked,
Walked in the rain all the way home,
I was lost many times,
But then I just wanted to roam,
Bought a bunch of food,
Went climbing Everest,
The experience is just to good,
When it wears off,
It's the scariest,
I feel lost,
Empty and broken,
When high,
I have everything I need in life,
I go on dates in my mind,
Fight bad guys,
Get stabbed,
And I'm just lying on the bed,
I wish I could stay high forever,
I can just get the person I want,
As my wife,
This is reality,
This is the second Life

I have been high for a full day now,
Smoked 7 joints the past 24 hours,
The experience is just wow,
I can feel the water slide off cars,
I can travel in time,
My mind can go anywhere in the past,
I can feel someone who isn't there,
Someone in front of me,
Someone I dearly care,
Someone I wish I could be free,
I can feel being with my love,
I'm reality she is not there,
But in my mind when I'm high,
We are drinking coffee,
On the grand canyon,
Inside a tent,
Watching the sunset,
And that is what love feels like,
Alone with that one person,
And know that we love each other,
And it's beautiful,
It's what everyone in the world wants,
It's what I want,
I'll see how long I can stay high.

I wake up,
Open Instagram,
And I began to tear up,
The first post is a ram to my heart,
It's hers...,
With someone else,
Always with someone else,
All happy and cheery,
And I'm suffering and misery,
The first thing in the morning I see,
Makes me cry,
Makes me angry,
Makes me wanna die..

My hands are bleeding,
My knuckles are bruising,
My skin is tearing,
My eyes are tearing,
Another hole in the wall,
And angry outburst,
It's not a first,
I have scars to prove it,
So much anger and pain,
All the time it is rain,
My mind is stuck,
I just want to break something,
Probably my own neck.