Ben Adam Johnston

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

All i am is a **** up
Don't look up you might see me falling from that building rope around my neck hanging publicly

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

Never

Never thought i would cry over a girl
Never thought i should
Never thought i could
Never thought she would hurt me
Never thought she tear my heart out
Never thought i would take my blades back up to the bathroom
Never thought suicide would cross my mind again
Never thought that i was going to **** myself
Never thought i would be here again with my blades
Never thought i would cut again
Never thought i would overdose again

Its over

#suicide #breakup #selfharm #pain #overdose

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

Beauty

If pain is beauty
I am gorgeous

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

Her

She brings the smile back to my face
It's not a race let's take this slow i don't wanna lose you
But she takes the blues from my life
She takes the knife from my hands
This is my final stand and i take it with her
When we are together all i see is a blur
And i will never tear our tether

Im feeling really happy today thanks for everyone's support on my "poetry" i haven't been writing for long and i find that it is a stress relief for me <3 you all

#love #hope #smile #happyness

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

You must know

Sometimes you must
Hurt in order to Know
Lose in order to Gain
Fall in order to grow
Because most of life's lessons are learned through Pain

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

Smile

I smile to cover up what's really going on inside
I am hostile to keep you from getting close
I enclose myself in my room so you don't see me cry
I put this noose around my neck so i can die
I lie to hide the truth
I am teary eyed thinking about my past
I had so much fun Back then
But now all i have is this gun to my head

I have dealt with suicidal thoughts since the age of 12

#suicide #death #pain #cry #smile

Ben Adam Johnston Mar 2018

Words

All the knife in my hand know is carving those words into my arm
All my stomach knows is to be starved
All my arms know is scarring

A cry for help is a cry for help no matter how you cry

#selfharm #starving