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There's a certain melancholy as I look out the window
the train swaying slowly, billowing smoke as it goes
my thoughts, clouded as they are, reforming me
I close my eyes and imagine the fields passing by.

I try to bring up the happiest memory I have
it's somewhere in there, formless and drifting
yet all I can remember is the path that I have traveled
all I can remember is the path that I have to travel.

I've been on this road for far too long
drifting from one destination to another
searching for an oasis in this endless desert
I am a traveler grown weary of the same old mirage.

The cabin rattles and pulls me out of my stupor
I go back to staring at those endless farms
this momentary respite from the journey
has slowly become the fondest memory of mine.

Smiling, I laugh at my own childishness
of wishful thinking, of dreaming about my goals
my destination is not at the end of these tracks
rather, it's these fields that I am passing through.
There's a difference in knowing who you are,
And why you are.
Because the past can't be changed.
 Jan 2018 Victoria
Dazed Dreaming
When I was a little girl..
I always believed that monsters slept underneath my bed.
As I've grown, I realized they were never sleeping under my bed.
They were actually sleeping in my head.
Cloud, sky and the rainbow's high up
But my pain is above you
I am hurt I told you..

Candles you might say that
Go gonna make me feel glad
But the light of relief, someone already blew
I am hurt, I told you

I am a logophile
So the books were in a pile
Each word wanted to embrace me
To break my silence, they knew
I am hurt, I told you

Leaves and flowers
For me they were blissful showers
But the orchids lost its hue
Just like before, in old, I saw nothing new
I am hurt, I told you

Time seemed liar
It laughed on my desire
Never thought that I may end my time
For it, my ballad was satire
I don't know, what to do
I am hurt, I told you

So the sky grew bright at night
Stars greeted me to fight
And the candles lit up once again
And words somewhat described my pain
Leaves became old and flowers
Entered my books and novels

And the time whispered in a soft tune
"You are strong, I told you".
What if I were dead
Faded somewhere
Away from you, then me
What if I left
you, within myself
Embracing the pain, you see..

Cause I believed
You won't deceive
You're my relief
My belief
We can't break
We'll never...

And even if you flee away
In dusk or day
I could feel you forever

And even if you're miles away
My love for you
Will send you to me, nearer...
 Oct 2017 Victoria
Lior Gavra
The moment you forget.
Mind wanders with regret.
Eyes blurred, lose focus.
“What’s my current purpose?”

Is spontaneous enough?
Chasing a dream, tough.
As a child we rushed,
what was all the fuss?

The lost moment finds.
The lost moment unwinds.
The lost moment reminds.
Messes with our minds.

In that moment there is clarity.
We connect with our reality.
Understand humanity.
Endless possibilities.
Test our comfortability.

A chance to breathe.
Rebirth and see.
Are we where
we want to be?

Take that lost moment,
to reset your focus.
To find yourself and
your new found purpose.
 Oct 2017 Victoria
Elrow Swift
You who goes by "Lonely"
Yes you, who reads these rhymes
Please pause here for a moment
I won't take much of your time

You see my friend, I'm lonely too
In the dark with paper and pen
So I'm writing you this poem
and signing it "Your Friend"

Though I'll prob'ly never see you
nor ever know your name
I do not need to see your face
nor know your cash and fame

I do not care what color you are
how short or tall or fat
I'm weary of all these parties and creeds
So, for a moment, forget all of that

Yes you, dear friend, forget with me
Inhale this moment serene
where we are not opinions or castes
Just two humans with two glowing screens

Be human with me, simple and pure
For a moment breathe deep and feel free
then should you have the time, and a halfway good rhyme
Perhaps write a poem for me.

Your Friend
This one isn't great, but I don't really care. I would normally throw something like this away, but the afterimage of hope made me wonder if maybe it would strike a chord with someone somewhere.  I promise to post more polished verse in the future, but all the same, thank you for reading. -ES
 Oct 2017 Victoria
Here’s to the boy
who waited for a girl
on his front door step
until she came home
after leaving without sound

Here’s to the girl
who has to hide her urges
behind a glass door
the strength to put down the razor
after shaving her legs

Here’s to the girl
who receives deluded comments
on the length of her skirt
from her own mother

Here’s to the boy
who didn’t have a father growing up
but is teased
because he’s more comfortable being friends with girls

Here’s to the girl
who finds solace
in people who are temporary

Here’s to the boy
that doesn’t feel safe
in his own home

Here’s to all the kids
who have been told it is wrong to feel
the way they feel
like our emotions are fishhooks
that need to be
reeled in

Here’s to you
Here’s to me
Here’s to anyone who has ever had
their heart crushed beneath the heel
of someone they loved

You are loved
You are important
You’ve made it this far
and you can make it even farther
have strength

Here’s to you
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