You’re scratching at my door,
So carefully and humbly.
Come in... You're so shy...
Don't be suprised. Go to.

You see, my door is opened now
And I’m not expecting guests at all.
In contrast to no one will enter here,
No one will cross the sill of all.

My home today is calm and empty.
It doesn’t scare me at all.
I am so tired of eyeless follies,
Of thoughtless cavil, eating up the whole.

Come in.
It’s clean and warm here.
It smells of labdanum and mint.
I’ll give you tea.
And now you’re here,
And we’re not to blame,
Nor you or me…

All these days are impossibly long.
And their sameness drives out of mind.
I’m here again, in front of you.
I did it myself. And I’m by your side.

I know it all, exactly, to point.
Your steady gaze’s callously cold.
Your voice’s like those strings, picked by fingers,
So lazily and heartlessly in whole.

My body remembers the touch of your hands.
So strong, so manly, up to you don’t.
And your distressing extended silence
Is able to **** with no shadow of doubt.

I’m here again! In front of you! Look!
I know, it’s where my doom is now.
But I grab hold of love again
And I can reverse just nothing and nohow.

I broke myself of looking ahead.
Why is it now?
There’s no one there, who’s waiting for me.
I can’t come nohow.

I’m walking random, I don’t know where.
It doesn’t matter.
I struggled a lot, but everything turned
Into a waste paper.

I’m crying: “Stop! It’s enough! I shouldn’t
Remember all that!”
But night is merciless and time after time
It brings me back.

It brings me back to that place, where
The light was on.
It brings me back to that calm quite,
Where I’m gone.

And my mucky memory keep your window
In its mind:
Your curtains of almond color and bed lamp…
Now there’s night.

I forbid myself to be sad!
Today I really want that!
Causes are more than enough in fact.
They’re all mine and I won’t forget.

I forbid myself to be blue!
I’ve no time for it, really.
My blues eats me completely at all!
I disburden of it entirely!

I forbid myself to be fear!
It is no longer for me.
I have no desire for fright right here!
There is no place for fear in me!

I confirm myself to live!
I’ll remove every hitch on my way!
To burn! To struggle! To show! To create!
That's how I love anyway!

Never, never look back!
All that happened to you is gone.
There’s no need to crucify yourself.
This all is forever gone.

Never try to return it all
That you somehow missed back then.
If it passed you suddenly by,
It’s not yours! Let it go away!

Never regret your past!
It is forever with you!
Bad or good it’s solely yours!
It’s only your skill! Your true!

You now look around!
Look at all nearby.
These’re the ones who believe in you!
This’s what you need the while!

Save yourself for those
Who’s faithful to you in soul.
It’s your great gift! The gift from heaven!
Appreciate them! They’re here in whole!

I wasn’t waiting for your call. I knew you would.
I didn’t bite off fingers, nervously awaiting.
I didn’t come for phone anytime
That it was late in silence as if flouting.

And I was walking on the street, so lazily and slowly.
And I was breathing calmly, evenly, full-breath.
And I continued living, saving plans and wishes.
I knew your call would come, there can be no pretexts.

And as it should be, my affairs caught me up
In its own dashing cycle with the head.
I don’t know how I actually forgot
About your call, which should be and no bet.

Yes, I forgot and you just didn’t call.
Let’s easy say that we’re kind of even.
I will go on. I’ll live without your call.
And you don’t call me, uselessly forgiven.

Your mellow voice with fresh dew taste,
Your dark chocolate eyes with inviting look
Aren’t talking to me, aren’t looking at me.
Hence somebody else needs all that for good.

Our hands never touch each other.
We’ve been looking apart long ago.
Your peace is the Sun. It’s warm an’ light there.
My peace is the Night with darkness and cold.

I don’t know, how all these could happen.
I cannot answer who is to blame.
And now I have to live somehow,
I have to live to spite of all them.

Your chocolate eyes and your almond hair
Fill me up… I cannot breath.
I need your smell! I need your looking!
I’ll truly love you up to death!