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  May 2019 Jennifer C
chasing rain
i am in love with you.

i am in love with the way
your eyes
curl into crescent shapes
when you’re happy.

i am in love with the way
your laugh
rings through my ears
like wind chimes on a breezy spring day.

i am in love with the way
your cold hands
fit into my warm ones,

and how you look at me
with reassurance i need
when i’m ready to burst into tears.

but i cannot love you
the way you want me to.

(let me explain myself.)

i am in love with the
thought
of you.

i am in love with the
concept
of you.

i am not in love
with
you.

i love you,
my dearest friend.

i do not love you
as my partner.

and i cannot love you
the way you love me.

i cannot give myself completely to you
because i am not
in love.

(and i never will be.)
—and for that, i am sorry
  May 2019 Jennifer C
Luna
It is everywhere
On the radio
In my friends' eyes
Right in front of me

It is part of life
The happy ending to every book
Part of life’s plan
What makes us human

It is a milestone
The progression of dating
Then marriage
And children

It is society’s solution
The one for sadness
For mental illness
To keep going when the world falls apart

It is why I am different
Unable to relate to the subplots in movies
To my friends' love lives
And will not ever have the option to

It is what the world will not understand
Why it calls me heartless
Unloving
And vile

It is inescapable
In the name of who I am
The name of my community
Aromantic

It is the reason I feel alienated
Because love is love
But I cannot love
At least not in the way the world wants me too
Sometimes living as an aromantic person is hard. Just some thoughts on living in a world where romantic love is everywhere, but you can't feel it.
  May 2019 Jennifer C
vega
but darling, just
what is love
but another word
for the feeling
i could never have?
  May 2019 Jennifer C
arowana
I’m sorry I can’t
feel that way
about you

I wish that you didn’t
feel that way
about me
15 y.o. me knew what was up
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