I want to keep quiet today.
Keep quiet with me, please.
I’m tired of screaming in pain.
Today I choose peace.

I want to breathe today
In tandem with you.
I’m tired of screaming in pain.
Breathe with me, I beg you.

I want to greet the dawn
Today only with you.
I’m tired of screaming in pain.
There’s no more point in rue.

I don’t want to wait for gifts
Today from my fate, you see.
I won’t scream in pain.
You are here with me.

You are my amulet today.
You are my peace.
Hide my pain far away.
Say a prayer with me, please.

Be a bird even if not heard
Be the light even in the night
Be alone even on your own
Be bright even if not right
Be simple even in the jungle
Be butterfly even when hard to fly

Why breathe when you know you will die,
When you're drowning, why do you attempt to breathe?
The water ,icy and cold like a spike to the chest,
As the water slowly fills your lungs ,burning .suffocating.
When you are bleeding out why do you put pressure on the wound,
Why do you push as you watch the crimson slip through the cracks of your palm?
The blood spilling out. Bleeding. Dying
So next time you ask me why i love when i cant be loved,
Ask yourself why are you breathing when you know you will die?

On the way back all these thoughts poured,
Leaving me more opaque than when I left.
All the fears resurfaced with their horns and pitchforks...
No, I didn't tread through this tedious hell just to fail.

And then a voice said:

"Facing your demons, and the ones you thought you left behind, never was easy. You get scared and overwhelmed, but that's why you pray. "

...and that's why suddenly, we could all move again.

1612

The Auctioneer of Parting
His “Going, going, gone”
Shouts even from the Crucifix,
And brings his Hammer down—
He only sells the Wilderness,
The prices of Despair
Range from a single human Heart
To Two—not any more—

CHASING ANGELS...FLEEING DEMONS

The morning was
a mountain

that had to be
climbed because

it was there.

She wasn't going to let
the mountain conquer her.

The whiskey helped.

She sat through endless
early morning TV.

She wondered if one could die
of endless early morning TV.

The gone cold fried eggs
with the subbed out cigarette

in its centre
like a flying saucer

invaded her
sense of self

"Is this what I've
come to...?"

she asked a mirror.

The mirror kept shtum .

The plate smashed to smithereens
on the cinnamon coloured wall

leaving a satisfying stain
resembling Argentina

trailing down like a Rorschach test
of how she was

feeling.

Another whiskey wouldn't
hurt...would it?  

*

“Chasing angels or fleeing demons, go to the mountains.”

― Jeffrey Rasley, Bringing Progress to Paradise: What I Got from Giving to a Mountain Village in Nepal

I grew too fast,
Yet not enough—
A child in silence,
An adult in rough.

Too young to be old,
Too old to be young,
My heart beats quietly
Where no song is sung.

I search for a place
That feels like mine,
But the world moves past
And I fall behind.

From the unseen
high, high, distant place
to the visible
low, low, this place
quietly, slowly
curving as they approach
snowflakes
melting on my cheek
quenching the drought in my heart
You are truly good.

Why did I say tomorrow is never promised?
When you go to sleep, you cannot guarantee you'd wake up the next day
Because a lot of people died in their sleep
So, if you still got a pulse, God's planted purpose for you is not yet done, you are still not yet finished, your time is still not up.

Be grateful for every morning, you still have an air to breathe

Have a nice day!