Hitting my own nerves,
I subject myself to the reading of words
Before the curve,
Unheard
Does anyone take the time to heal
all the other wounded birds?

Aren't both sides gathering the nerve?
Weaved into the world,
Darkness
Clutched round their hearts and necks to preserve
like strings of pearls
A world breeding monsters
out of innocent little girls.

Real-
is the courage to wake everyday.
your heart refusing to not play
its song.
with a bountiful, limitless forte.
No mezzo, no piano.
Life is the finest concert hall and stage.
And I will never
ever
refuse to play.

I never claimed to be more than I am;
A spirit stuck in the body of man.
A curiosity to understand the master plan,
A girl who let emotions get out of hand.

I too have evils I have triumphed,
I too punished as I was punished,
Reddened the face of love with a harsh, flat hand
At the time I could not understand.

I too hated for no reason,
I once shot looks to strangers as though they were guilty of treason,
I too have felt there was nothing to believe in,
I once took daggers to my own skin just to feel myself bleedin.

But there was a reason,
For every bad day, nasty comment, heartbreak, and trauma.
There's a reason, I swear, for everything you call drama.
There's a reason, lurking under the surface of your life.
If you believe,
If you try,
To your dreams you can give flight.

Quest for a kind soul,
chanting in the same rhythm
for delightful tunes.

I should be laying beside you,
with my hand between your legs,
my head on your ***** - while listening to you
murmur out your dreams.

I should be laying beside you,
carving your sleeping body
with things I would like us to do;
to each other when you wake up.

I should be laying beside you,
listening to you tell me about the times;
in your life;
when you and I were strangers.

I should be laying beside you;
for when you and I were born,
the empty sides of our beds -
are place holders for when we are finally together.

I should be laying beside you,
because that’s where I want to be right now;
juxtaposed your body.

Just because I write about you,
and sing about you,
doesn't mean I think about you too.

I'm just doing everything I gotta do,
Everything that let's me let go of you.
Everything is turning,
Oceans heated and churning.
Baby, what was I to do?

I loved so hard and long,
everything started turning blue.
and I hate it, man. Stayed faded, man.
Cause I started falling in love with blue, too.

I was crazy, that deep deep kind.
Weak and hazy, lost all of my mind.
Swear I didn't know what went down,
Or some days why we kept one another around.
I just wanted you to know, about the realness I found.
So different now.
So clear and out loud.
But the real me still hates,
how much I let us both down.

Don't ask me how you can obtain,
something you already know.  
If you seek a spiritual gain,
Only you can go.
Take in the love
Replace the pain.
Try breathing like you know,
The world won't be the same,
For any of us who let go.