I miss your skin and the warmth it held,
And its power to warm me in the coldest mornings.
I miss your doe eyes full of care,
Gorgeously painted by an angel.
I miss your old apartment we'd hang out at,
which us more comforting than my own home.
But at the same time, I dont.
I don't miss worrying when my texts were left unread,
and I don't miss worrying when you hung out with that one girl,
Then again I'll still think of you daily
(and I may never stop..)

for over a year I was in love with you,
And I thought we were swans,
perfect and forever,
but, really,
someone else was your swan,
now that I've stepped away,
I realize maybe I NEVER was YOUR swan

I've always told my family about you,
how beautiful, how funny, how smart,
but my favorite topic was your heart,
how kind, how loving, how empathetic,
And, always emphasize how large the size of your heart was,
how substainable, how extensive, how significant,
but it took me months to finally see,
how blind, how dumb, how it inattentive,
your heart was too big,
it could fit her, too.

Sometimes I wish you were a bad person,
As if you'd have hit or yelled,
Or tried to make me feel poorly about myself,
Or do anything wrong at the slightest,
But you never did,
Rather, you had showed me what love is,
Writing notes that I still read some nights,
Holding my hands or kissing my lips,
All the small things you done for me,
Make me miss you more everyday.
But I know if you were a bad person,
It wouldn't hurt so bad anymore.

She was my reason to life,
I was sinking in her every moment,
She was kind of a knife,
That can hurt you in any moment,
Her brown eyes and dark hair,
I fell in love but even didn't notice,
I was waiting for her under stair,
Just to her grandma didn't notice,
We were kissing at her sofa,
And I felt her soft hips and gentle lips,
With the taste of cherry coca,
And all I wanted is holding her tight,
Laying on her chest,
Hugging her waist,
And she was the best,
But I wasted her, I wasted.