I’ve been covering up my wrists already
For when it’s bliss they’ll still be steady
Yeah, you heard that right, you ready?
To listen to something kinda heavy?
Heavy in my heart, I feel their part
The parts of them that don’t want to win
The kin of the devil that lives within
We were promised the law of death in Christ
So why won’t all these things die already
This weight feels too heavy for the paid price
Thrice, I tried to lie to you but now it comes through
That my roof is proof that I lose
Because it’s so low and caves with snow
That I’ve shown you it glows, but now you know
Rightfully so, I owe, it to you to blow
No, I won’t close, because what’s posed, at my nose
I know, I feel the flow, in your show, so I’ll go, I’ll row

S o m e t i m e s  I  c a n  f e e l  m y  b o n e s
b e i n g  c a l l e d  b a c k  t o  t h a t  r o o m
w h e r e  t h e  d e m o n s  r e s i d e .
B u t  I  g i v e  t h e m  n o  c o n t r o l
o v e r  m e .  T h e y  h a v e  n o  h o l d  a n y
l o n g e r .
I  h a v e  l e f t  t h a t  r o o m .  A n d  y o u  
c a n  t o o .
I  h a v e  c o m e  s o  f a r .  I  h a v e  y e t  ******>f a r  t o  g o .  B u t  h e r e ,  w e  a r e  n o t
a l o n e .

I know 2am far too well
I recognize the darkness in which I dwell
I know it front, back, and inside out
I recognize the crazed words my demons shout
I know that even under my sheets
I will loose myself in the night's deep
I believe there's a reason why I won't sleep
I can dream of a morning though now I weep

I think it’s interesting that my most famous poem
Is one that I underestimated
But it gives the message I want behind each piece
It has one like, and had never trended
But somehow it has the most reads
And I think that’s interesting

I’m looking back in the woods
I know that I could
I see a forest, earnest for me to go towards it
But I don’t feel drawn like a was before
Yet I know the dawn will break in retort
But I can see through the trees right now
At how I got through the wondering about
And I reflect on the previous thicket
To those first poems I has written
About not believing the fields were real
But then I experienced the glorious seal
But then again I denied the deal
And relied again on what I feel
Right now I’m going back to that metaphor
To help me again in going toward
I have been going forward all this time
But that is because of someOne divine
The line is not straight, but there’s the gate
Always there with the line drawn in the sand
So I won’t toss about like a boat without land
I am docked, even when my ship is rocked
Because I know of the final island
And I will sing to Eden
In the darkness of the highlands
Unlocking the rocky road to freedom

Have you ever noticed that at first,
you weren't really attracted to them,
but the more you got to know them,
and the more you two laughed together,
and the more you both smiled at each other,
and the more you fell in love,
the more beautiful they became,
and now they're nothing but beauty?

thank you for lyrics that help us understand what it is we're going through, and thank you for giving us words so we know how to fight it

Actions speak louder than poetry,
so do no fill your words with promise,
when really your heart has let them hallow.

I've tried to give up poetry,
As if it's some addiction.
Sometimes I feel like an addict.
Do you ever feel like that, you poets?
Do you get my depiction?
Addicted to the pen,
Confined to your mind--your paddock.
I feel like a ****** who's on it again,
Writing another poem to a friend,
For others to use it as I pretend.
I'm addicted to the waves,
As I'm tossed and blown about--their slave.
They pull me asunder.
Oh Lord, take me under.
Blow my cover.
Let me not be another fanatic on dope.
That doesn't mean I smoke;
I'm talking about words with emotion,
But sometimes I get lost in this ocean.
Compulsive to smoking,
I'm writing this, hoping,
That as my pen is the lighter
And my cigarette is the page,
I can light your soul on fire,
While keeping the addict in his cage.
May your demons choke on the brume
By the words that are the smoke you consume.

I could post my second-guessing
But I rather share the blessings
And how dumb I was to doubt
As if it was up to me to work it all out

You cried when You had to face betrayal
Did such a sin make You feel the veil?
And if so, since we feel this curtain
Is feeling death so certain?
Must it always be at my side?
Must I always want to die?
I’m in-between, two meanings
And I find each side can be fleeting
You seeing, my meaning, friend?
Is it seeming we must always be between
Always lost if we’re being honest?

I am wise,
because I've been a fool.
I am brave,
because I've been scared.
I am strong,
because I've been weak.

Will you let me know your plans tonight?
I’m willing to take the gun from your hands,
even while it’s still loaded.

Man gave names to all the animals
So no wonder we give names to our own
To what’s not in sight of our candles
What is hidden deep in our bones

It was man that labeled all the beasts
Was it our duty to name all our demons?
We crafted the dark on which we feast
Could this have any sort of meaning?

We’ve named the monsters under our bed
For some, it’s the flesh beneath our skin
It’s the addicts we keep locked within our head
We’re only engraving our own extinction

I could take the easy way
I could use one of the rootless poems
One without the depth of what I write for
Then they wouldn't know
They would just see talent
And I wouldn't have to fear for what they think
What they think about my thoughts
I'm afraid to get the truth that I'm alone
If it affected no one, or if no one spoke up
Then they would know, and I'd still be alone
But would I do it, if there was one person?
One person in that crowd,
Only one that fears their mind,
Who feels alone
Would I do it for them,
To let them know that there's more put their,
More like them?
Even if everyone figured out what I think?

I step away from this world given to the blink
So I have no noise to hide my mind behind
To allow myself some room to think
Although I will ponder of something terrifying
But I keep myself in this room of silence
Because the sound only allows thoughts at night
Though my thoughts can have a side of violence
The quiet I feared may be able to shed some light

My opinion--
Life's worth living
Culture says,
"Might as well."
Problem is:
It won't sell
Death's addictive
But the price to live
Is worth the pay
So I will say,
"Please stick around.
I'll have you found."

Would I rather die than give my life to You?
Would I still be in a state of solemn blue?
Surely the angels will catch me
Surely the angels will catch me
But it’s just testing
Surely the angels will catch me
But it’s just testing the Spirit
God testing me so see I’ll surely make it through
Because there’s nothing He puts me through
That He will not deliver me from, so I won’t lose
I know He’s given me a way out, that I don’t doubt

You have a life, come and see
Take this pen and do as you please
But in time, please remember me

I probably lost a lot of me,
but thanks, anyways, for setting me free.
I've made it to be the dark that is lost,
so I won't treat it like a loss.
My mind was buckled in shotty,
but now I'm taking back what belongs to me.

I think it would be neat to be like Banksy
To leave my mark on the world, still unknown
You won't know when I come or when I've gone
And no, don't ask me to write for your honor
You can't erase truth so don't prove me wrong
It's not prossible to bend reality and twist meaning
Just listen to my voice in what you're reading
My message known, but I don't want the glory
I'd give my real name, because I don't want a mask
But I don't want to hear any of the praise
God gave me gifts, so if anything, glorify Him
And I don't care for any of the ridicule
I'll tell you right now, my words won't be lenient
I don't want my name to be heard
I want my voice to be listened to

My t’s are uncrossed and my i’s are un-dotted
I lost when I fought it but my God has just started

I didn’t like what I had become
On this website, what I had done
What it had reminded me of
I was ashamed so I left this stage
I hid and hoped you’d forget
About the legacy I wanted to leave
So I left, and put this on a shelf
I don’t know what else I may write
Or what I won’t do right
But I hope to convey some light
That God does not love you based on what you’ve done
But when you accept Him, He loves you through the lens of the Son
When you go to Him and lay down your life
He will not deny you salvation based on your past

I search for  s o m e t h i n g

   between the lines,
                                                         Something
as if there's something more.             I dream
                                                          about
                                               Then it's    gone.

I want to have it,
                                 To be freed by it.
           it's like
         a song.              I can't
                             get out of my head

Oh,
                                    it's such a
                                                  pitty


      ­                                       to

                               release          a
                                              ­           thought


        and be          greeted with

                                                  silence.

one

                                   night
        we


                           will



                                                        d­ance

                     again




                     under

                                                          ­          all


        the





                                     stars

Sleepwalker.
                            You               beautiful
                                             sleep          er

             , concious but           not awake
                          screaming

              of
     ­                         another life.

      allowing                                yourself to be carried
                       by                blind fate

               replaced         by a parched, famished
      
         nature.
                                   death.
       a
               rootless                 man
         not
                            a living soul

What if sneezing allowed us to rid us of the demons
Instead of blessing flowing from our noses
Our greeting are for the devil’s fleeting
Rejoicing in this enforcement
Contorting the very distortion
And reversing how we curse us
A different stanza to put on our mantle

The blind can't learn to see
by opening their eyes
I can't abolish this gloom
by putting on a disguise
But through faith and trust
I can find my Lord
I will remain in prayer to Him
and abide in His Word

As we grow older
Something tells our hearts to grow colder
So that we will walk so much slower
I could feel my temperature drop
And I doubt it will ever stop
Hell is hot for a good reason
Because my soul is freezing
I will walk down the route for a season
Then I'm afriad I don't know what I'm thinking
Sinking deep, because I'm my own shrink
Can you tell I fall asleep when I give to the blink
Please don't think

Tower of Silence - Track 7

Verse 1
Once again, I’ve found myself up against a wall
Play pretend, I hear voices linger down the hall
I know, because I’ve done it all before
I don’t feel like doing this anymore
I don’t want to trouble you when the sun sets
I won’t show you all my pieces
I refuse to give you all my troubles
I neglect to let loose to all my demons

Pre-Chorus
Can you hear the voice inside me?
Do you know what my art means?
It’s calling out a cry, showing you my seams
Can you sense what my tongue claims?
Do you feel what I’m trying to say?
It calls you by name, asking you to stay

Chorus
I am a ghost
Transparent to those who get too close
Haunted by the ones I love the most
I’ll transmute on the low
That way they won’t know
And if it’s making me seem low
I am a ghost

Verse 2
All these people, they are real
All these questions, they’re sincere
All these voices, they’re for-real
And I will try, to let your words pass me by
Please ignore me when I say I’m fine
So I’ll ignore you still
On what I’d rather ****
Regardless, I don’t know how I could have fought this
Honest, I’d been even deeper down in the darkness
If it wasn’t for this art, God gave me as a start
But I am haunted still
All these voices, they’re for-real
When I write I begin to fear
At the sight of what is really here
I write some things and it seems so worthless
I say something and it feels so wordless
Maybe that’s the purpose
Memories formless, deep thought verses
Thinking comes to surface
Writing to plead something, rhyming but I say nothing
I have not forgot—You are all I got
Just trying to make it all stop
So before you go, don’t walk away
Listen for what I have to say
Deeper than this art or talent
A different dialect I can’t unpack
Eventually I will have lines to offer you
But you must stay—be here for what I’m going through
Stay by my side and give me time
My head is dead and decayed but I’ll be okay

Pre-Chorus
Can you hear the voice inside me?
Do you know what my art means?
It’s calling out a cry, showing you my seams
Can you sense what my tongue claims?
Do you feel what I’m trying to say?
It calls you by name, asking you to stay

Chorus
I am a ghost
Transparent to those who get too close
Haunted by the ones I love the most
I’ll transmute on the low
That way they won’t know
And if it’s making me seem low
I am a ghost

Verse 3
I’m driving inside my mind, and I’m driving kinda sideways
A runaway, but I don’t feel free
Relying on the highway—why can’t it be my way?
Swerving over the yellow lines
Give me some times to speak my mind
It’s stout to let it all out
So maybe my words are just drought
I know you’re worried for me and what I find
My head’s not right but I’ll be fine
I promise you I’ll come home some time
But in the meantime, listen for my cry
No, you don’t have to keep me down from ledges
Or steal from me razor blades and shoe laces
But prop you door open with wooden wedges
For when I enter into these dark places
For long enough I’ve tended to a heatless fire
Scared of labels they press to uninspire
Tried to convince me this gloom was nothing
Then you’d think I’m demented or something
But at the same time my aloneness was hyped
Making me think I was of the insane type
But it’s nice to hear my words filter in you
Otherwise I don’t know how I’d make it through

Outro
I know it can be hard
Don’t go in alone
Don’t think you have to be tough
Let your cover be shone
Your oxygen’s running low
Let our cover be blown
And steak out the window

Together we’re singing
Lah-lah-lah
Lah-lah-lah
Lah-lah-lah

I once was a Heaver, just like you
Lost in a sea of solemn blue

My boat capsized at an early age
My mind was so detatched I barely remember this stage

Slowly I found my way back to shore
But I sometimes fear I'll end up like before

The night will haunt me still, with things I've overcome
The dark reminds me of what I can still become

So you see, I've had scars where a light is shone
And I've rowed in a sea that was not my own

I have found my breath and now I give it to you
A blot of yellow in your solemn blue

Tower of Silence - Track 13

Verse 1
I see the canvas behind your eyes
I see the artist in disguise
I see the portrait painted so no one else will see
I see dimly lit sands and beyond a vast sea
I see your pallet—black and grey
And I see the bright colors you display
I see in your eyes the dripping color
Windows to the soul, I know
I see, you don’t trust a single other
So know, even if our eyes never meet again
This show, I hope you take it on the streets
I see, and realize you are just like me
I see, and I long to remedy

Chorus
The sun seems to fall with such gravity
Falling out of orbit as we lose our sanity
The night brings gloom as the day comes to an end
But you must know the dark is not your only friend
In this moment you must let the world turn
Keep going and shadows burn
We might not all make it but please try
We will win so find hope in what should die

Verse 2
The world gets worse, day by day
It burdens my heart, to see you this way
There’s a place for you in my soul
But that hole in you is filled with decay
You wish to place a bullet in your brain
But you’re afraid, it will just rattle around your head
I want to help you with this stain
But we will never know what’s not said
I know it’s not easy to un-bottle what’s inside
But with me and my music you don’t have to hide
I want to take it as my duty to save you
So I’ll direct you to the One who gives refuge
Do me a favor and gather your shards
Eclipse the moon and we’ll tally the stars
You raise up white flags most of these days
I was born with you so won’t you stay
So you will burn like a countryside star
For our God is not that far
They will not cast you out, they will not take you down
For in Christ, your meaning is found

Chorus
The sun seems to fall with such gravity
Falling out of orbit as we lose our sanity
The night brings gloom as the day comes to an end
But you must know the dark is not your only friend
In this moment you must let the world turn
Keep going and shadows burn
We might not all make it but please try
We will win so find hope in what should die

Verse 3
You have given your sight to the bottom
And fancy the darkness in which you swim
But notice the bliss of your abyss won’t let you in
So friend, please take your hands from over your eyes
This gloom has meaning because you are meant to be free
There’s light out the window that you must see
The night will meet it’s end, and you my friend will stand again
I once was a Heaver, just like you
And I can relate the what you’re going through
Lost in a sea of solemn blue
Slowly I found my way back to shore
But sometimes I fear I’ll end up like before
We grow stronger the more we endure
Building up for when the night brings more
It’s a question I struggle with—what’s it for?
The dark is the conflict, but hope is the driving plot
There’s peace in the storm, of this I’m sure!
So aim at me and take your shot
And I’ll show you all’s not lost
The night will haunt me again with things I’ve overcome
The dark reminds me of what I can still become
So you see, I’ve had wounds where a light is shone
But the might we can overcome when we kneel at His throne
So now I hope to row in a sea that is not my own
I want to know the valleys you are meaning
Because each of us is a human being
And the pain you feel is nothing new
No, I may not have seen your depths
But I have found my breath and now give it to you
A blot of yellow in your solemn blue

There are several books inside my mind,
one of which is a turning tide.
There are many rooms inside my dreams,
one where I balance on ceiling beams.
There are a couple bookshelves in my head,
one that hangs merely by a thread.

I have instances in my reality,
where I hold my breath cowardly.
I have a voice inside me, disguised,
that says I am a mad man and lies.
I have moments that tear me down,
so I fall and drown.

I have a God who fights my battles,
but still my head spins and rattles.
I've developed a tendency to do my own doing,
and that's why my fears are moving.
They move through the night out of sight.
But in reality, my hope is never losing.

I feel bound by these lines, using the same old rhymes
It’s the same crimes every time
The same debate between dying
Is it my duty to keep going back to this music
Re-do it, to prove that, He uses
Our flaws to draw them all to calling?
Am I falling and balling to honor is this all that
I’m called to, to show you, through my music?

I got a buzzcut
It’s not exactly the same rut
It’s not suppressing dark, but
I’m still in the cell
And I think God has me dwell
So I can know everything well
I just thought I’d show
That I know
And I will go

Be gone, you bygones
But there’s nothing wrong
With letting them go on
To morph into better songs
A sort of eulogy to their long

Tower of Silence - Track 1

Verse 1
I’ve tried to give up poetry as if it’s some sort of addiction
Poison to the heart as if I’m an addict—do you get my depiction?
Addicted to the page, confined to my mind—the paddock
I feel like a ****** who’s on it again
Writing another poem to a friend
For others to use it as I pretend
That I’m not another fanatic, devoted to the pen
I’m addicted to the waves
Tossed and blown about—their slave
They pull me asunder
Oh Lord, take me under, blow my cover

Chorus
No, I don’t know, what’s my direction
But I can accept the blind man’s perception
Take me under, blow my cover

Verse 2
My feet dangle up off the ground
I levitate above the sound
Ever since I was young, I’ve been on dope
Nowadays, I use it to be my rope
I’m just a *** head, I guess
Really it’s just my head, more or less
Am I just being dramatic? I’m emotional
I’m just ranting again, I regret what I told you
It’s just the cof-fee tal-king
So let me just be in my own world
Because I can’t explain what’s in whirl
So how could I be prepared to share
My faith with what’s beneath my hair
So bare with I’m a Thinker
So don’t listen if you rather be keeper, to yourself
Go throw it away and let me do myself
If you stick around keep it on a shelf
It’s therapy for me and it might be scary
It’s the wrists of a poet, my release yet my blade
It’s creativity so I know it, the control of pain
Like you I’m a user of dope
That doesn’t mean that I smoke, no
I’m talking about words with emotion
But sometimes I get lost in this ocean
Compulsive to smoking, I’m writing this hoping
That as my pen is my lighter
And my cigarette is the page
I can light your soul on fire
While keeping this addict in his cage
May your demons choke on the smoke
By the words that are the brume you consume

Chorus
No, I don’t know, what’s my direction
But I can accept the blind man’s perception
Take me under, blow my cover

Verse 3
Tie a noose around my brain with floating feet
Still breathing, my mind will not be able to seep
Choke of the lull, my throat hung on a leash
You demons have no hold on me—capeesh?
It’s a catharsis, but honest, it’s darkness
So it’s not for you if you’re heartless
I could post the depressing lines in my head
The flow is smooth and the lines resonate
I could hold a celebration for another name
At least it’d save me before I dissipate
Then that would just be returning to the dead
I’ve decided that between who would die
I choose my name to be lame and my God to glorify
So between you and I, I’ll write for you instead

Chorus
No, I don’t know, what’s my direction
But I can accept the blind man’s perception
Take me under, blow my cover

Oh Lord, take me under
Blow my cover

I've never been one for conflict;
I'd even say I'm a chill dude.
But when I feel like someone's
blowing smoke between you
and me, I get a feeling I can't
describe, but all I know is if
they try something, I'll call in
the rest of our cavalry.

I don’t believe in breath as to talk
I like what you can do with chalk

I won’t drag my nails on a blackboard
Rather I’ll let it passively pour

I don’t believe in breath as to talk
I like what you can do with chalk

I think I stopped for a girl
Because there’d be no love in that turmoil
And I stopped for my friend
She made it through and me back again
Turns out it was for the Savior
By Him and through Him He made it
Because I was not connected
When I cut myself by selection
But our God went ahead and intervened
Planting seeds between everything
That’s the way our God works
And by this love we are saved from hurts
I obliged and I thanked Him
I die by living for Him
It was no mistake and I was not His favorite
His love is for all at the door hinges

I never really understood
Why you like coffee anyway
Having something so cold and bitter
To start your day

Or maybe it's just me
Acustomed to the customs of this world
A product of this day and age
And that why I couldn't see

A past so dark and dreary
Shown in your eyes cold and weary
Weak and beaten down
You fell away beneath the sound

To live again another day
In the quiet cliché of this café
Within the solitude of your own creation
You view the world through your imagination

That's why you would take a sip of bitterness
In this jaded and abstracted mind of yours
Now the only bridge to entity you'll let through
A gentle reminiscent of reality's grim kiss

There's something about a blank
college-ruled notebook.
When I see one in the store, or even
just a page laying out on the table,
I'm enthralled.
I see opportunity, adventure, a
spark of creativty, and a mind
longing to roam free.

Come, Autumn, on September wings
     Come, the quixotic aura this season brings
Welcome, the golden harvest, and its plentiful reap
     Welcome, turning of the foliage, falling to paint
     golden streets
Transpire, crisp air, with your sway in timber tops
     Befall us, pumpkin skies, where the sun drops
Betide to me, the lull and composure from you,
     calmest breeze
     Make yourself known, won't you please?
Recieve gladly, the crackling of fire beneath a silver
     moon
     Embrace the little things, for they will go away
     soon
Welcome, fall, the enigmatic emotion as the season
     starts
     Welcome fall, with open hands and blithe hearts
Come, Autumn, with the romantic feelings you stir
     Come Autumn, I hope to be lost in the ambience
     that is her

Oh, you beautiful blue sea
Oh, you bountiful lush waters
Come into this and see
Come closer, away from the slaughters

Because in every waking moment,
                                                        w­e are all dying.
Within every sleepless day,
                                           we are losing ourselves,
bit by bit,
                                                            ­piece by piece.

These are my confessions, find rest in them
Deep thinking, I hope you see, and meeting
The God that gave you your brain
And now things shouldn’t be the same
Now that you know your Creator has made
And your death in debts has been paid
You can speak freely to your Father
And talk to Him about the things that bother
And I’m sure your questions will be answered
When you give your heart over to be prepared