Hey,
Here i am thinking,
Is it a good thing?
Or not ?
Just who i am right now?
Here i am wondering,
Am i on the right path?
Maybe yes or maybe not?
Then when is the ending?

All the questions and thoughts,
They come like bullets,
Dancing like ballet,
Slowly, beautifully and suddenly
its become sorrow.
Lingering around my mind and
flowing through my vein,
Then here comes the precious droplets.

At some point, it'll stop.
Gone with no answer.
With no any tracker.
Then its just me alone,
Looking to sky and hold tight,
Hoping that "Everything will be fine",
Just fine.

"Physically" flawless,
makes people be so shameless.
Mentally madness,
because love is the craziest.
Through the sky and the moon,
There are so many beautiful things,
Some of it I couldn't understand,
and some of it not even "shine".

When the night cover the blue sky,
Billions of stars are "blooming",
Billions of thoughts are coming,
And makes me thinking,

"Wish i could count all the stars and all my scars".

Its just at the end of the day,
Let's just put a fullstop for the day cause tomorrow is waiting,
Till the eyes close,
May all the thoughts be my "lullaby".

When I work by myself,
I feel like I am lonely,
Could feel the wind dancing,
Could feel the feelings I should not feel,
Could have thought of million things,
And missing the touch between the other's skin.

While,

When I am surround by people,
Curses become goodnight wishes,
Love become painful and heartless,
Fighting is the main course,
Dark is our source,
And Light is not for us.

What,
What should I choose?,

Where,
Where should I go?,

Who,
Who should I be with?,

The answer?
I still don't know,
I am clueless,
Just following all the endless road,
With heart full of hopes,
May the ending bring all the "pieces".

Where are you?
Where are you at when I feel weak,
All the darkness kept hold me down,
I do not know if I could hold it anymore,
because I know "they" will come more and more,
non-stop like don't know when "they" will stop.

Hey, can you find your way?
The way to touch me,
Makes me feel that "you're" still existed,
I know almost the "inside" surrounded by black light,
but I want you to get out of the dark "maze".
and meet me at my gaze.

I feel so miserable,
I feel so helpless,
I am so weak to speak,
I really want to shut my eyes forever,
And makes "them" disappear until
they're out of number.
Yet still, "they" are good at controlling me,
Am I hopeless?

Maybe yes I am,
but I still want you to know
Dear Mr.Strength,
please come back to my life,
and together we create a better life.

walking through a tunnel,
no light no wind,
no sound could be heard,
no "potion" to heal,
search for anything in the bag,
but nothing can be "grab",
face up, looking straight,
no sun to see.

"they" keep pushing me,
like there's no limit,
My soul is so weak
with no any "spirit",
they asked for it,
I keep give it,
need a short break,
from all "those freak".

is this the only path?
maybe yes or not,
give me some light,
to open my eyes,
I know at the "front",
there's always a way to walk through,
lead me to a better tunnel
and have some space,
my wound could be healed,
with an "easy" phase.

what time right now?
I ask after I have done
every "blissful works" of mine.
Every "blissful art" painted,
hope its consume my time.
But it will never happen,
not even a time.

what time right now?
I keep asking
every time I'm daydreaming.
Just don't want to feel empty
and want to "run from reality".
Like the world has no meaning,
I took a pill to swim into my dream.

what time right now?
Wondering all day long,
got nothing to do.
Keep brushing off all the "artwork"
painted on my body,
while whining on my knee.

what time right now?
I give a look to the sky
when the night "bloom".
The moon says "hi"
and the sun said
"hope to see you tomorrow".

then
I'm crying in my mind,
hoping with my heart,
before close my eyes,
24/7, please no tomorrow.

Once,
I open my eyes,
The world are so dark,
There are no stars,
There's no moon.
While I wonder
where's the stars and the moon at,
The air hit and turn my face,
Towards a group of people
that once
hurt me,
try to **** me every day,
and even made me cry.

In that space and place,
I am watching their body "covered" with fire,
they're dancing in front of me,
THEY SCREAM IN FRONT OF ME,
I couldn't stop smiling,
my heart couldn't stop beating "happily".
Then I watch them swim in a pool,
the pool are full of acid,
their skin torn out "smoothly",
their blood mixed very well,
that's make the "view" more mesmerizing
and I love it.
but

it's disappointed,
it's just a DREAM,
it's only my desire with some IMAGINATION,
and lucky it's only "hit" me once only.
While I'm hoping the dream come again,
my skin torn out
instead of them,
feel like it's never end.
The reality spoke clearly and loudly,
Pain was destined for me.
and I couldn't run from it.
not even a mile.