Lyrics that just resonates

"if you hold me without hurting me
you'll be the first who ever did"

-Lana Del Rey ♡

You left me crying in the hotel bathroom
You left me spying in the restaurant too

You saw me for who I am
Then went up and ran
While I’m working on my tan
Trying not be who I am

Gotta stop begging you to stay
And turning up the Lana del rey
Cause I’m no one’s Brooklyn baby
I’m feeling just a bit crazy

when i write
i always find myself wishing that i wrote like Lana del Rey,
making even the simple things seem extraordinarily grand, to be able to glamorize what is sometimes a painfully normal life
i want to touch someone's skin
and write about it in a way that makes someone feel as though they're touching velvet
i want the kiss we shared
to linger on someone's lips like the taste of their favorite chapstick
i want to write about love
so that in turn someone will lust for what i already have
i want to write about my years of pain and isolation in a way that makes someone want to rip their own heart out and offer it up to me on a platter made of shimmering, sterling silver
which, of course
i'd have to refuse
because what would a writer be if surrounded by love and admiration they knew was real, that they didn't doubt for even a second
although, the sensuality of the circumstance might be tempting
an artist without eternal, incessant suffering
is merely a wolf in sheep's clothing
or a fool who thinks he's a king
they simply aren't built to last

i want to write about my mid-night thoughts and for someone to think: Lana would be proud

I loved you since the first time,
What a fool I was, (thinking you could heal my all fears).
Do you even recall what we set out to find?
I know now that we weren't even near.

Loved you more cause you were my first score
"say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
oh baby, you-"
That day was made from the dark stuff but it lived in the light.

It ended on Sunday, such a comedown Monday
I got cut up in school, thunderous thoughts
over-thinking you. So I started dealing
and became enslaved to the game.

Loved you more cause you were my first score
"say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
oh baby, you-"
That day was a better place, we were together, off our face.

Loved you more cause you were my first score
"say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
oh baby, you-"
That day, it's lost to me. I'm lost when I think of it.

Come on baby, decide.
Feel these colours without their light.
Choose your path, leave your steps behind.
Throw The Doors open and breach the other side.
Be definitive in your choice,
In this design.

Our fascination
with these compounds:
The amps, the tryps;
The sensation, experience.
They amphlify emotion,
We tryp over the empirical.
Come on, what are you waiting for? (The sun!)
This galaxy was meant for us; born.

Ms. Del Rey says “the world is made for two”,
but her idea of two is some fresh hell;
it’s seems that Lana thinks a girl’s abuse,
is cinematic fodder one can sell.
The other woman sings about her man.
“sO pOPuLIiSt” with flowers on her head.
While some may come from poor & tell the tale,
Del Rey wears being poor like it’s a dress. 
But voices that she channels in her songs,
Bespeak a femme fatale alone, and they,  
Are both no one, and everyone in one.
The guardians of endless summer days.