People - places -stories- all that matters

how typical of us !! we are desperate to walk a new street everyday

We hungry for stories that fascinates us all the way

And it is still people who are left in the oblivion, far behind the curtains

For we are hell bent and certain

To take people for granted, 

Hold hard enough on the things we wanted

While it should be the other way around. Isn't it?

You know, it is people who whisper soul in stories. Else they are nothing but specks of dust. It is people who create a masterpiece out of the dust, turn greasy clay into a gorgeous bust.

It's people that make places feel home

make you forget you are stranger to the land

And you feel free to roam 

These streets greet you like they have known you for long

They recognize you as a companion of one of their own

There I said it. It's people. 

You know, people are lonely even in the most serene hills

In the warmth of the dunes, feel the cold sighs if you will

And in the crowd, alienated, dismantled by their own conflicts and emotional drill

Hence, my love !! It is a fresh gust of breeze

To see how you prioritized these with ease

So let me raise a toast to the light you have shown

Repelling the moths of chaos, allowing all the order you can own

Acknowledging how much you have grown

To the girl I once knew

To the woman I have known!!

the misted air
that arrives with the winter nights are laced with something strange
The more I breath them in, I don't want to throw them out not that soon
I want to hold them long enough
that they could reach deep enough
Enough to wet the bits of my soul
That has grown infertile and dry
Over the time, when the air around was not warm but burnt deep
And I exhaled smoke while the heart skipped its beat

Ok, here is how she's like.
Place a mirror in front of her
And then a million more all around
Then there it is
Million of reflections of her
Each at different perspective
But still symmetrical
Now remove all the mirrors but
Not her images,
And you could see million sides of her
That is how each day with her goes by
Taking it in from one reflection at a time
And a million yet unseen
Honestly, it's exciting!!

All these pursuits
And this voracious appetite
to tame the impossible
These years of grinding
And not even getting distracted for a minute
By the gluttony of settling for something lesser
These house of cards
That once I thought were concrete columns
They are falling apart
Courtesy to the mildest wind
That is blowing somewhere far far away.
This conflict fueled by strong memory  
It's a catastrophe
The fire to the canopy
And who is to suffer and burn and shatter
It hardly matters..
The damage is on
And god knows how long
before its done.

Come hold my hand
And when our viens touch
I will guide you soul into mine
How lovely that would be
How divine!!

Do you remember that eve,
One of many to come, I believe
You came home withered
Your eyes were red
But your hands were cold
You wanted to quit your quest
Buried you face into my chest
That was my first "situation" with you
I didn't know how to deal with
All I knew was " I have to do my best"
I made you sit on your favourite chair
Where you would often fall asleep
While reading
But mostly just sitting
I guess it must be crazy deep
And I made you that coffee
I bragged about so much
You held your cup
with both your hands
Sieving the warmth
through your palms
And took a sip,closed your eyes
Like some just recited
The verses of Psalms
While you drank your cup
I watched you in silence
Sitting on the edge
Running fingers through your hair
When you were done
I thought you would say
Something about my coffee
But all you said was
" I can't remember what was I so stressed about?'
and you looked to my face
Only to see my big grin with
"I told you so" patched over it
Then you went back to your thoughts
We didn't say a single word
You sat there holding me by my arm
Your mellow breath said it all loud
You love me and my coffee,without a doubt.

Yes, you are free
to nurture those feelings

Feed them dreams and hopes
And let them
germinate incessantly
Into a chaos inside you!

Yes, you are free
to take your time
And segregate them
as you like.

But be sure
about the one
Whom you have
restlessly chosen
To harvest them...

Your orchard of strawberries,
red and bright
They may claim
as land of carcasses
Barren with pits
of black blight!!

Pwac..

I remember how much you loved the rain
You said this is the best thing ever
in the world full of lesions and pain
and this is nature's way of mass healing
to cool down our burning hearts
so that we can care more and love again.

I learn
when you break my heart
and I burn
when you stab my soul
and still
I believe
these breaks and burns
make me
such a passionate lover
and then
I love you again
due to the lust
for the pain...

What would I be without "the fear" of losing you
this fear is the fuel that keeps me alive.
this fear rejuvenates my love for you every morning.

The reason for this fear?
the incomprehensible doubt in my mind
"What did I do so great to deserve you?"
Is it that "you are with me at your will."
And someday like the wind changes
you will change your mind
and seek for a better and bright on your side
and then I am determined once again
"That day shall not come, not on my watch."
"I am gonna be your MAN for all of your seasons."
This is when "the fear" hits hard again
and I am ready to go all the distances
just to be with you in every lane...

The day she said goodbye,

I

Lost control,
Overdosed on
****** and
Exhaled all the
Desires to go sane.

HELPLESSLY hopeful.
ENDLESSLY enraged.
RESPITED from breathing again.

Letters in a bundle
INKED with
KISSES of her
Electrocuted my brain.

A goodbye my poison, my bane.

Lunatic nights,
Oblivious days,
Venom in the air,
ESSENCE of the pain.

Starcrossed and ******.
Overdue love and lust.
Never enough for your trust.
Gave her the gold, the dust remains...

straighten your bow
there is an immense contentment
in trying hard,
standing on your toe,
not waiting for the applause,
at the end of the show,
zero ***** to give
for faces that fall down
when your answer is "No"...

Surrender if you can't do
or
render if you want to
there is no place
for a defeatist, a flaccid mace.

Cry if you feel so
or
try if you can take the blow
no one remembers the grey
the ashes are forgotten in the tray...

Lie if you feel insecure
or
die in the quest to procure
the wind gratifies the soul
who walks against it with a hunger for galore

Defy if you can't take the heat
else
Comply if you expected the beat
don't sulk and forfeit the game
stand steady and take all the blame

Unite if you dare to share
else
Divide if you can't be fair
The trophies just shine for a while
Later, they gather dust in the exile

Believe if it invades your sleep
else
Relieve if it's beyond your keep
Don't make promises, you cannot tend
Don't demean the hopes, you cannot transcend

Walk the road for the sake of the journey
And
Talk if your words quench their yearnings
There is no pride in yelling the sermons to the mass
the words will finally bounce back and hit you at last....

Do you remember
that pretty day
when you
exculpated me out

and made me
understand the fact
that
"you understand me
better than I understand
myself"
you reshuffled
the thoughts
in my head
and now they make sense

and for all what you did, I cherish the most
you went the distance to slow down my beat,
felt my fragile
emotions locked in the dark pit.

That day, I cried like a child in a long long time...

A drop here
a few of them there
and a lot of them somwhere
not a single drop you spare
and if the maths goes wrong
Don't you blame
Don't you regret
Don't you ask if it was fair
just pack your bags
walk away, steer clear
the only take away
from your every journey
"to let it go"
it may be a thing you desired
or a night you yearned to share

Every evening around seven
I grow restless seeking for my haven
searching for a single beam to survive
A desperate attempt to dive

The crater that I had been filling the whole day
with egoes and ashes of my sweat
expands itself so big and deep
******* me into it to settle the debt
I just stand there breathing only half
the poltergeist inside allows no
air to pass
all I do is take this massive sighs
only way to end this is just let it go by

I go around the town
in a gait of a drunk clown
unprecedented steps
unprecedented goals
unprecedented plans
this unprecedented hole
Not a single soul I can trust
Nor can I let it go
I just feel so **** alone
for a moment wishing my heart to burst

Just when I feel I cannot take it anymore
and I get down to shut the door
the clock strikes nine
and I hear it so very loud
there goes away the scary black cloud
and I suddenly get all very fine.

If some one could explain me
this ridiculous pang
or else one of these day I will end this with a bang....

these ****** couple of hours...

You are "DEPRESSED" when you still have

" the inexhaustible willpower to fight back every time you are lost in the abyss of all possible existential threats"

If not then you are CLINICALLY DEPRESSED.

You are STRESSED when

"You are mentally torn into pieces, loathing everything in the world and still love yourself. you know you can resurface anytime.
All you need is spend some hours, maybe days in solitude, talking to yourself, reassessing and coming back with a better plan."

If you cannot, then you are CLINICALLY STRESSED.

They just lie down there,
Without saying a word.
And they could meditate
On the rhythm of each other's breath.
Gradually, the tangled thoughts
effortlessly unwind themselves.
And they don't even ask how.
All they care is all they know.
She is just her.
He is just him.
They just are
on a perpetual par...'

Dark horses are mean
and they don't seek any jockey.
They are rather ready to lead
And they don't seek your trust
They don't show when they bleed.

They rather heal themselves on the go
You can lay down all your plots
They don't care if you hit a new low
They draw the line, they don't connect the dots

"Life ain't easy" the famous of all hacks
"Ride ain't just a life" they know deep down
They go along the beats of their hearts
They don't hear any other sound

Call it crazy but it never mattered
They don't think before they grind
They do look behind once in a while s
to see if anyone has fallen behind

But again fear of death comes to all
so they too can't escape the thought
But before it gets rooted, covered with rust
They run even faster impossible to be caught

One evening, where other horses lived
He arrived there moving slowly in a crowd
The bridled horses gathered to see
his saddle-less back that felt like a stroud

Someone asked, "how do we believe he is the same?"
that he is the one we have heard about in the song
The old brown horse said "Don't be naive and see good"
I know for sure as I wanted to be him when I was young

 If you see a dark horse you will know he is the one
Eyes dry due to all the indifference in the air
And that subtle, content and soothing smirk on the face
The pits of hooves filled with pride in many layers

And his tail lost all its hair in the run
Each of them fell at places, turned into milestones
They want him to sit and tell his story
But he says "only when I am filled with dead bones."

For the day he sits, his journey will end
He won't stand again for another run
He just stopped coz he got thirsty
The adventure will resume at dawn

So he stood there surrounded  by other horses
And just when the first sun ray touched the king's crown
He ran so fast starting a dust storm so big
before anyone could assess he was way past the town...

Those springs
and the fountains
those snow bombed
mountains.
Where sun sleeps
at the night.
Woods sway
and hearts glide
Where we wrote
our first song
the haven,
your home,
where I belong...

When you are hopeful
for big opportunities
to be found,
some teeny-tiny moments
become even bigger
turn around.

And you are left
with eyes wide open
and mouth so dry,

you are lost in the pointless dilemma
whether to capture that moment
or let it go and just cry...

How serene it would be
if the graves could actually hear
the nicest things people say about them.
For they were too busy ignoring them
when they were alive
and now they have all the time in the world...

I would stretch a second
into a million parts
and live a lifetime in it,
not sparing a millionth part
in a moment of regret
when I wasn't with you...

Only if I could manipulate time
and it would not even matter
if it were a crime...

The sunshine sought her permission
before it could bathe her in orange
and yet the world drew its glory
of her radiance without her consent...

Such was her mistery,
she was impervious and generous
at the same time.

The purpose of your life is often forgotten
and at times it doesn't even matter.
You toil hard to recollect it, reconsider it and somehow
Reconstruct it.

For a while, you take pride in seeing what you have rebuilt from scratch, from broken bones.

But that moment of self-appraisal is so ephemeral that you fail to capture it like you have done all your life for tons of other moments, you thought were vital.
But they were lost in the mist of
Procrastination and complacency, your only two bullets in your barrel.

So you are done recreating your purpose, one more night went by
without your eyes getting what they have craved for years, sleep.

Your brain exhausted and demolished inch by inch in the futile iterations, but you don't give up. And yet those red cracked up
dry eyeballs don't fail to do What they do best, see through the cracks lines of your glued pieces.

They exactly know how and when they will fall apart again for they have seen the same now for untrackable times.
Your head doesn't even try to comprehend what you are
forcing it to understand. For it has accurately anticipated the outcome.

After all, past experiences do save a lot of time effort and energy. Once again you have ruined your night, and perhaps the day to come and years to go.

All your determination spent in useless resolutions that are destined to doom tomorrow first thing in the morning.

Coz you have used freshly brewed Willpower to exhilarate a soul that seeks rest and solitude and blankness, a speck of nothingness if possible only for a second.

How pathetic is your cognition, failing to apprehend your own mind while you live your life in vanity claiming to understand others?
For once in your life, surrender.Raise both your hands and say "**** this ****". Go far far away from the things, people and places you are remotely familiar with.

Give your thoughts a ventilation and your head a passage for clearance. Pour every drop of them into a pit and cover it with rich humid assimilation.Don't worry if they will germinate.Just leave them there on their own.

Move away to the edge of nothingness, clearing the shelves, dusting off all phony ideas, dreams, and whatnots, you have accumulated during those insipid nights which you thought were your companions, your shed of solitude for you were a fool.

For once,  surprise yourself, love yourself like you have done to everyone else in your life but you.

For once, don't bother thinking before doing something.

For once, taste the mystical taste of consequences no matter how grave they may be.

For once, just do it and let time and another side of your brain handle the rest. It has been there for a while now doing nothing but watching the other half thinking, compiling junks for years.

This is nothing but bathing your soul, your conscience, your perspective in the spring of voidness.

There are times when you feel
you and the real you isn't the same
and for a while, you go blank
not sure, whom to blame.

But as soon as you realize
going through it is the ultimate resolve,
at first, you might feel that suffocation
but soon you will understand and evolve.

and very soon, I mean very very soon
one EARLY morning you will find
the real you is the same you
you only had to understand your kind

coz the world is messed up
and at times that blurs our brain
when we seek the wisdom
the world feeds us training grain...

When she ran,
she actually flew
and started a storm
that unroofed the palaces of the norm
the old birds in the sky
couldn't believe their eyes
for they waited for a millennium
breathing out the last sigh of hope
to witness the realization of the prophecy
and the patience paid off every second
for it was utterly and divinely DOPE

serendipity
the cure of a malady
a place in her heart

Last October, I deleted my FB account
just to satisfy my curiosity
how my days will be without it.
will I be tagged a Cave-man
or called the anti-social guy
or some pretentious snob
who wants to stand out in the crowd...

The first couple of weeks were tough
and I craved for that juicy stuff
and every time I opened my browser
my fingers would press "F" FIRST

In the first week of November
I wrote my first poem
not because I was feeling like a poet
but I had to channelize my focus
away from the topics, my friends discussed
all the memes that were flooding
the Viral videos that made them laugh a lot

On one cold night, when
I think the moon was bright
or maybe I was too high on ***
I googled "Start a poet's blog"
and I came across "Hello Poetry"
I am sure my stars were too high on luck

Before I published my first one
I read more than hundreds of them
Some poured them arranged
some had a celestial range
a few "songs for their lover"
some stories of "How it got over"
Many of these brilliant minds
have derived out a way
to tackle depression
and suicidal cravings
through rhymes and words
I felt this is one of the best
support group in the world.

The best of all, I was overwhelmed with joy
when I ran through the comments
and I discover this blessed group of people
who actually  cared about your plight
they shared their own stories
and assure you with sublime affection
that "you are not alone going through this"

This is more than just a poetry blog
It is a whole new universe
where the thoughts are profound
and your feelings really count
no matter how filthy it is
when you write them here,
It takes the form of fertile ground.

And this is home for some of us
who find the world too distorted
but cannot let their "waves" go free
for they fear for the judgment
and the social decree
or the worst of them all
fear to be transported to some
asylum for behaving like a "Lunatic"

Till time takes a turn
and normal is "the real truth" again
I will make this place my nest
and let all my chaotic vibrations
get settled and be ready to harvest.....

that evening,
                you conquered me completely,
                            
                 so perfectly,
                I wished this is all I want
              
               and all I did,
               what I desired for so long,
            
              held you
              against the wall of my shabby room.

              As I came closer,
              I could taste your breath

                           the freshest breeze,
                           I have ever inhaled
                                
                        ­    I caught the whiff,
                            wished never ever to breathe out
                  
                   and baby
                  the moment was blessed.

I tenderly ran my hand
                             up your curvacious waist

you melted so sensually,
                 the gods would fail to stop for a rest.

                         the more I leaned forward,
                        blankness ran through.

         Just when the time
         was utterly divine

                                 you did something
                                my heart leaped strides


                          the way you closed your eyes,
                                   I had an epiphany
                    I could sense how much you believed
                          in the promises we made.

                         the luscious lips of yours
                    brushing against my dry ones


and with every second passing,
I felt a jolt inside me
filling my heart with
the juices of your love.

                                                 I had no clue
                                                       when you unbuttoned my shirt
                                                         and you took that pause
                                                                ­    to get even closer.

I embraced you so tightly,
kissing the right of your neck,
you let out a gasp
buried your face in my chest,
all I could think was
if time would rest.

                              I held you harshly
                        by the scruff of your neck
                                                            ­    and you dug your nail
                                                                ­       deep into my back,

all of these fueled the fire, my love
I lost the track of life
like it never existed without you.

As our unclad flesh
rubbed against one another,
and the rhythm of our breath
found a hard time to sync,

                               our heartbeats were inaudible
                             taking the break they YEARNED.

I held your both hands into one
and raised them high,
for they felt like obstruction,
a medium to unite
and I sought no mediator
to aid the passion of ours,
                                                   for I have contemplated your
                                                                ­ face for long enough,
                               they radiate with the most
                                       pious flames of desire,
and that is the same thing I
am greedy for the time being.

the evening I live for, the night I live by
coming back home to you as soon as I can
for the moment I see you, to hold you so fast
not a fraction of a second gets spilled
that I regret my time till it lasts.

Anti-depressants
swallowed a few every night
he loved his dreams most

the wave collapses
the moment you interfere
so does mind palace.



(The basis of quantum mechanics is the wave-particle duality and the uncertainty in measurements of physical values. It has been established that "Any wave travels indefinitely in its own way until someone makes an observation of it. the moment you observe a wave function, it collapses to give a fixed measurement, and the uncertainty of one quantity reaches zero, while that of the conjugate quantity becomes infinite."), SO THE WAVE COLLAPSES.

My fellow poets who read or write haikus, I would appreciate it to the core if you jump right in and critique my writings...

The broken mirror
each piece on the floor
reflect all my faces clear

Did you ever go through a phase where
"When you weren't doing what you loved
you were happy and full of life."
When finally when you are doing what you love
overcoming all the barriers,
you find your dreams
too shallow to hold your happiness...
Am I being a pessimistic ******
or this is really a thing?

Yes. Yes.Yes, I am high
and I don't deny
the whisper lullaby
tuned to my every sigh
and I don't try
to ask anyone passing by
"why don't you fly?"
or sail through the sky
like I am sailing tonight
overcoming the fear "to die"
no more of sickening alibi
and no desires to satisfy
and not even wishing to defy
any conspiracy or your lie
coz I am high... absolutely high
if you want, you can pry
but if you wait, and don't spy
I will tell you the secrets of life
the mystery of the butterfly
and later you can testify
coz once I am not high
you know I am shy.

"What's wrong with these flowers?"
they aren't any more divine,
"Why does the rain stinks of feces?"
it should be pouring the old wine.
"Is it warm or cold or maybe both?"
I just cannot decide" what is fine?"

these mood swings of yours
are like a roller coaster  ride
you might feel the vibes
and judge with the strides
but I can't help loving those
no matter how hard I tried.

Excruciating is the swim,
under the monotonous glim.
The walls, I wish to defy
and give what  it takes to satisfy
my dream of freedom
my freedom of dreams
taste the saline cream
for I am the turtle in the tank
aspiring to leap high
to swim across the ocean
under the mighty blue sky

Insipid is the strawberry
she feeds me with delight.
my heartbeat numbing down
succumbing to the blight
If only she could hear
my cry under the carapace,
I would take her to my abode
and bathe her in the sunlight.
for I am the turtle in the tank
breathing blood with every sigh
my scutes fading away
my wings are calcified.

She tells me matters of her heart,
and stories of her trend,
and at times she makes faces
that I fail to comprehend.
At times when she is gloomy,
she just stares me blatantly,
as if asking me to understand
for I am the turtle in the tank
and that is what I try
I sooth distressed hearts
and mine no one pry.

This submission shall not perish
nor should it be an apparition,
my story,
with its inherent glory,
shall be a beacon for the lost
celebrated for the fortune it has cost.

to put it simply enough,
I didn't start with any blueprint,
that moment,
with the scent of ferment,
grabbed my gut, punched to the core
numbing my senses, throat dry and sore.

Why is that a shabby room feels warm?
the light is dim, the bed is grim,
still a pleasant company of the swarm.

The luxurious suites miserably fail,
the floor is cold, soul long sold,
and not a single tale to tell...

Hey, watch out!
will you mind your steps?
You are walking all over,
on the evidence and suspects.

Not that I am adamant
to frame a snob like you,
but, if it helps,
I won't miss to cut off few.

You surely are innocent,
who the hell am I to blame,
but I am sick of you, baby
No more victim of your shame.....

I have walked these streets, marked these trails
rode through the jungle a hundred times.
Never bothered to stop and pry into
the privacy of the lamppost,
stole the dews on the petals,
or eyed upon a tree to climb.

I walked the same path again,
fingers crossed, this time not alone,
for she was walking with me.
It was a strange feeling
like our footsteps played piano,
and the asphalt wrote the song...

I have seen countless suns, falling down.
Never felt like capturing one of them.
With her, it's whole another tale,
watching the sun kissing the earth
at the end of the avenue,
right from then, I was never the same.

I felt like my senses have woken up,
rejuvenated, after years of deep sleep
the petals winked at me,
the streetlamps burnt brighter.
And the trees seemed concerned,
telling me only to make promises, I can keep.

I, all these years thought the road was too long.
Now, I know it was the drag that kept off pace
With her, the route is all new,
No more the pinches of anxiety,
nor any shoves of meaninglessness,
I wish to tell her "In you, I have found my place."

Covered in the manure of expectations,
chained in the shackles of social approval,
I lost my identity long ago.

And every moment,
I had been so ******* myself,
to stand justified rightly among others.

Life has been nothing but an unbalanced equation,
I failed inevitably to find the correct coefficients.

Treated me like a beast in a cage, so tamed,
valued my happiness on the wage I gained.
Forgot the gems that I had inside me, sustained.

But this was not my fault, I swear,
it was you who maneuvered the spear.
to lock my dreams, for they were surreal.

Your lessons of life are dead, as you are
They are nothing but brutality above par,
Now I realize it, late, let it be
I won’t be your puppet anymore,
like you found in me.

The fire inside me has not extinguished so far,
I am writing my own terms with your tar.
My rules will bloom like the nightshade,
amidst your darkness, it won’t fade.

I won’t stand latent tortures of yours,
Clarity and freedom, my source,
Enriched with hopes and dreams, of course.

While you go
and find your next prey,
I am here
with a challenge for you…
When you will capture one
I will free two….

"Messed up I am," you say,
pointing out my rugged clothes and untidy hair.

"Careless", I am tagged,
for the craps, I don't care.

But, let's stop and analyze for a while.

When I walk calm and composed,
feeling the air,
you run and chase, unsatisfied,
filled with despair.

I say I feel it, I like it, I love this.
You say,
you have no time for all these.

I tap my feet,
on the beat, we hear,
And watch you if you would,
switch to that gear.

Coz, you are the one
with the dance medal.
And now you don't try,
not even a push on the pedal.

Now, you say who is messed up?
You or me?
Though your suit is great,
and your hair neatly done,
you have no peace,
inside you burn.

You run a track,
leading to illusion,
and all you have is
a big pile of confusion.

All I say is live the moments in your time,
And seek your peace, your love sublime.

I can feel it.
see it, believe it...
Yes, I can.

The kindle of destruction...
Oh man, this is good...
Yes, this is lively
Enjoying this canopy of death…

"Death? Enjoying? Are you crazy?"

No, I am not.In fact, if the truth has
to be TOLD,
I haven’t been wiser,
seeing this brutal massacre.
I would have given the best I have...

But today…
But today as life is on a rampage...
I can feel the thrill...
The goosebumps aren’t lying.

And the only price I paid,
for this One-time annihilation… is in time.

The time has finally turned its face,
The destruction is good,
because it has destroyed the hypocrite I was,
the shallow faith I had…

I am astounded by the canopy of death,
for I can see the death of waste
that I was.
These selfish beliefs have haunted me my entire life.
and they are dead.

The dance around the fire,
that is being fueled by my racist ideas,
my sexist prose,
my fascist poems,
is exhilarating…
feel the pace of me breathing…



I have a beginning planned,
a path well lit.
and goals strong fitted,
with thoughts, properly ventilated…
I wish to live life for its beauty...

I will start in that way,
where the concern is my tool...
and the concern well accompanied by positivity...

I dare now to stand for the human race...
attempt to expel the pessimistic radicalism,
deep-rooted…
and preach happiness…

And when I walk that road,
with love in my heart and song on my lips.,
I hope to find you there,
ready to be my partner,
sharing the dream of a better world,
because I am a believer.

And just to simmer the smell of ashes of failed me, let's refract.