You procrastinate
You are lazy, AF
You are childish
You believe in God, just not that religious.
You pray sometimes, most times you don't.
You listen to music,
you know its a sin. You do it anyway.
You don't drink, you've tasted it though.
You used to gamble
You like to think you would change someday,
just not today, not tomorrow, but soon.
You understand you might die anytime,
even tomorrow,
but you don't want to think about that.
You know you will probably end up in hell,
if you go on this way.
You think you have a unique taste in music
You like hip hop rap, R&B,
and whatever TF Olamide raps - or sing.
You like 21 pilots, Billie, Jon Bellion among others.
You like Eminem, NF, Lil Wayne
You love J. Cole. - Its a Cole world
You resonate with being fake,
You totally get it when J Coles said
"I'm a fake ***** and Its never been clearer.
Can't see me when I look in the mirror"
Except you see yourself when you look in the mirror.
You watch movies
Maybe too much
Mostly series
You hate Yoruba movies.
You hate Bollywood, too much Film tricks
You read
You just don't do much of it
You like classical novels
You hate business books.
You like poetry
You like Nicki M
You admire Shukroh
You have a crush on Tomi
You have never been in any relationship though,
Not because you deliberately choose to.
Probably because you're just so naive,
or because you are broke, like broke broke.
But you are far from innocent.
You have dreams
You think you might be successful
You are not so sure.
You are afraid you won't
You care about what people think about you,
more often than not.
You think you are not normal
You are an introvert,
You prefer being alone.
You hate sympathy
Someone did a terrible thing to you
You don't hate the person
You don't know how you feel about it.
You'll probably never tell anyone about it though
You did something terrible to someone.
You feel this pain in your chest,
that ugly cringe on your face,
every time you recall.
You said sorry, and you meant it
You lied to your parent
You are not trying to hurt them
You just want to spare them the pain,
and yourself of the pain,
knowing they felt pain because of you,
of facing the fact that despite their best efforts,
you are a mess.
You intend to fake it, till you make it.
You are dying
You have health problems
You didn't seek medical help
You can't afford the bills yourself
You won't seek help
You are that stupid
You think you are closing up on doom,
on a downward spiral.
You are your worst enemy
You know you've yourself to blame
You'll always be grateful for Omolara's generosity
You'll never understand Shukroh's heart of Gold.
You are so lucky.
You don't deserve them.
You are thankful
You are trying to critique who you are.
You are sad, maybe depressed.
You want to convince yourself,
this is all part of life
You hope everything will be alright.
In the end.
I'm not sure if this is poetry but...