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lu Jan 2018
it's midnight and i want to talk to you.
of course we're texting, we always do.
but i wish you were here with me,
where i can't hide behind my phone screen.
so i can't hide my smile from you,
and i can see your smile too.
while i show you one of my favorite bands,
i'll probably try to hold your hand.
unfortunately these are things i cannot do
because i'm far away from you.
here i am again, thinking too much.
  Jan 2018 lu
A'ishah
Whenever you scream, no one hears.
Whenever you cry, no one cares.
Whenever you need a shoulder to lean on, no ones there.

~ A'ishah
lu Jan 2018
I DO NOT LOVE MYSELF.

I SEE MY SCARS
AND A PAST FULL OF BROKEN HEARTS.
I SEE A GIRL WHO REFUSES TO EAT
FOR GAINING ANY WEIGHT WOULD MEAN DEFEAT
I SEE MYSELF AND START TO CRY,
MY SMILE IS A COMPLETE LIE.

I DO NOT RECOGNIZE MYSELF.

I LOOK AT MY REFLECTION AND WHAT DO I SEE?
I SEE SOMEONE ELSE WHO ISN’T ME.
SHE STAYS UP ALL NIGHT,
UNTIL THE SUN BLINDS HER SIGHT.
SHE CAN’T EVEN SLEEP ANYMORE,
SHE LOST INTEREST IN EVERYTHING.
SHE’S SUCH A BORE.

I’M SCREAMING, SHE’S SCREAMING,
PLEASE TELL US WE’RE DREAMING.
LIVING IN A WORLD WHERE WE CANT LOVE OURSELVES,
WATCHING ONES WE LOVE, LOVE SOMEONE ELSE.

AND THEN ONE DAY I MET A BOY,
AND FINALLY MY HEART WAS FILLED WITH JOY.
THOUGH HE LIVES SO FAR AWAY,
HE DOESN’T FAIL TO MAKE MY DAY.
I ONLY HOPE HE NEVER SEES
ALL THE DEMONS INSIDE OF ME.
lu Jan 2018
all i want to do is talk to you
i wonder, do you want to talk to me too?
i have so many things to say,
but i do not want to waste your time every day.
i want to know your favorite food,
or what actions could put you in different moods.
do you prefer night or day,
is your birthday in march, april, or may?
we talked on the phone one night,
and my smile was so genuine and bright.
i knew you could not see me,
but when you can, i hope you don’t see what i see.
i too don’t want to move things too fast,
in fear that what we may have won’t last.
but i also want to rush into everything,
so you can give me pretty songs that i can sing.
you live so far but that’s okay,
i hope we’ll hold each other one day.
i believe we can do it, i truly do,
if we keep up this teamwork between me and you.
  Jan 2018 lu
Jovanka Marsha S
The first time we met on this island
The only silent witness our meeting is this land
For my love i have committed
I will stay unrequited

Unexpectedly i will soon be forgotten
All our stories are turning rotten
Then i deserve to be alone
Without you my one and only home.
Jovanka Marsha S | Jakarta | 18.38
lu Jan 2018
i am still scared you know.
i caught feelings, but should i let them show?
could it be true?
it’s only me and you?
is there someone on the side?
or something you’re trying to hide?
i want to be girl,
the one to send your heart in a whirl.
the who makes your heart beat fast,
and the only one you want at last.
but if you don’t want me,
what will be will be.
my brain will not shut up. make it stop.
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