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Nat Lipstadt Sep 2024
(trigger warning: my apologies to the long poem haters,
nah, not really)

<>

Dawg!

your last and latest test be driving me crazee-
the poem conception birth rate is out of control,
them titles intriguing, stinging,
falling like curling up and dying oak leaves crunchy neath my feet,

and this little town don’t allow no burning thereof,
inclusive of leaves, poem drafts or witches

it’s not only the skin-pores, inhaling,
but the braniac neurons
that are clogging up
(ex. where’s my coffee mug hiding
when it ain’t hiding in the microwave)
and there ain’t no legal Drano for the
upper cortex contextual,
and condoms on my ears looked upright atrifling,
small & unbecoming, 
so pse. put a lid on it,
without sacrificing my nice head of grayling fibers
you graciously let me inherit ~
(thanks mom!)

soooo,
need to provide a method of contraception, legal and100% poem~proof, to keep me in decent metal health, with a natural speed limit on steadily in~fluxing immigrants of
seditious inspirational insights,
and these insider’s outside sights/sighs that
my eyes catalogue, and remind/tell, as well,
my buddies, the animals and the elements,
who constantly are hinting ‘n suggesting themselves
for yet another scripture of praiseworthy adoration

(esp. the rabbits, the ospreys, &
the nighttime starry skies,
a living tableaux de peinture…)
to pretty please
cease and desist
before *I

seize (up) and de-exist,

overwhelmed by piles of dead leaves
and out of computer memory
for anymore inspiration retention

Your earliest attention to this
Matter of Urgency to me, and

What‘a that you said?

Start a petition?
You kidding?

Might as we try to buy indulgences,
in bulk at Costco,
though they are never in stock!

I get it.

Using Pandora as your voice never fails.

You just played Judy Collins singing
Pete Seeger’s Turn,Turn, Turn.

Unsubtle.

This is my seasonal hint too,
part of my timed descent towards the
shadowed valleys + visible peaks I’ve
occasionally reached

My finale’s approchment nigh,
yet, don’t turn my heart or my senses
just quite yet,
from the spark divine you have placed within us each,
don’t let it burn brightest before
it flames out of existence
into extinction.
Appreciate the heads up, really

Most don’t know ‘bout this method of our conversing,
and the hint, the seasonal changeover, taking place now,
is mourned by my utterance with every breath of
a Kaddish prayer
contained within
a larger message:
natty, it’s time to
turn, turn, turn

Which way when,
of courses,
you’ll musically clue me in…

but you impatient being,
drawn after all in the
shape of humans,
fast forwards, nay hurtles this human,
with chariots spun from a summer sun’s
fonts and hints,
accidents and incidents,
by spectacles through spectacles,
colors emboldened by  
in a glory, glory, glorious
sun-nation

****!

Vienna Teng sweetly invades singing
Homecoming (Walter,’s Song):

but things are good I've got a lot of followers of my faith
I've got a whole congregation living in my head these days
and I'm preaching from the pulpit
to cries of “Amen brother”
closing my eyes to feel the warmth come back
and I've come home
even though I swear I've never been so alone
I've come home
I just want to be living as I'm dying
just like everybody here
just want to know my little flicker of time is worthwhile
and I don't know where I'm driving to
but I know I'm getting old
and there's a blessing in every
moment every mile…

well I'll kneel down on the carpet here
though I never was sure of God
think tonight I'll give Him the benefit of the doubt
I switch off the lights and imagine that waitress outlined in the bed
her hair falling all around me
I smile and shake my head
well we all write our own endings
and we all have our own scars
but tonight I think I see what it's all about
because I've come home
I've come home.”*
(lyrics by Tom Hall)

Got it.

so many summarize better,
but even still a bit heavy handed when
you follow up with  Sting’s “Fields of Gold,”
and even, jeez, Louse,
“Danny Boy?!”

Your DJ is a ham
(I know, not exactly kosher).

It’s my season of the muse,
extracting every remaining incantation,
knowing  there are hundreds, thousands,
of notional ideations
in my draft files,
some born even before HP!

But deny them not their use,
they cannot remain forever
unemployed,
but at their peril, double toil and trouble,
be them entrusted, encrusted, secreted
in someone else’s existence,
by your annoying divine persistence

Demanding Being,
have you no sense of
sufficiency? (1)

Eva so sweet Cassidy
ends this trip
with “Who knows where the time goes ?”

Gonna pack up this ditty,
containing a peace of deity,
drive back to the city
where all my sorrows
are streeted above ground,
inescapable resounded …

now down to  2% battery (ramming)
and this cracked -screen
whispers too gently,
“no mas”
my dearest companion,
you still don’t know
when to shut up,
or call it quits,
but I’m hearing a new crew
old familiar poets, awaiting,
who will take one up & in,
relieve you of you earthly sins,
and I hear up there,
you’ve got
unlimited
data storage
and no need for cords
and
batteries

Seeing the schooner drawing nigh,
must be the season of
‘at last, here is Shelter,’
repentance (2)


<>

n.m.l.
Weds. Sept 4,
2024
while sitting by
my dock on the sound,
who insists that it’s
soundless wavings of water
get the last silent
mention
published Friday Sept. 6,,
Sabbath Eve

p.s.
(and that’s how u put the playlist
in an Audio Visual poem,, kid)
(1) “Who by Fire
https://hellopoetry.com/poem/1833523/for-leonard-cohen-who-by-fire/
(3)

https://hellopoetry.com/poem/462537/how-i-observed-the-day-of-atonement/
<>

Ecclesiastes

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to ****, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
Sethnicity Oct 2015
I was a fiend ... before I became a teen
I melted microphone instead of cones of ice cream
Music-orientated so when hip-hop was originated
Fitted like pieces of puzzles, complicated
Cause I grabbed the mic and try to say, "yes, y'all"
They tried to take it, and say that I'm too small
Cool, cause I don't get upset
I kick a hole in the speaker, pull the plug, then I jet
Back to the lab, without a mic to grab
So then I add all the rhymes I had
One after the other one, then I make another one
To diss the opposite then ask if the brother's done
I get a craving like I fiend for nicotine
But I don't need a cigarette, know what I mean?
I'm raging, ripping up the stage and
Don't it sound amazing cause every rhyme is made and
Thought of, cause it's sort of, an addiction
Magnetized by the mixing
Vocals, vocabulary, your verses, you're stuck in
The mic is a Drano, volcanoes erupting
Rhymes overflowing, gradually growing
Everything is written in a code, so it can coincide
My thought's a guide
48 tracks to slide
The invincible, microphone fiend Rakim
Spread the word, cause I'm in
E-F-F-E-C-T
A smooth operator operating correctly
But back to the problem, I gotta habit
You can't solve it, silly rabbit
The prescription is a hypertone that's thorough when
I fiend for a microphone like ******
Soon as the bass kicks, I need a fix
Gimme a stage and a mic and a mix
And I'll put you in a mood or is it a state of
Unawareness? Beware, it's the re-animator
A menace to a microphone, a lethal weapon
An assassinator, if the people ain't stepping
You see a part of me that you never seen
When I'm fiending for a microphone, I'm the microphone fiend

After 12, I'm worse than a Gremlin
Feed me hip-hop and I start trembling
The thrill of suspense is intense, you're horrified
But this ain't the cinemas or Tales From the Dark Side
By any means necessary, this is what has to be done
Make way cause here I come
My DJ cuts material
Grand imperial
It's a must that I bust any mic you hand to me
It's inherited, it runs in the family
I wrote the rhyme that broke the bull's back
If that don't slow 'em up, I carry a full pack
Now I don't want to have to let off, you should have kept off
You didn't keep the stage warm, step off
Ladies and gentleman, you're about to see
A pastime, hobby about to be
Taken to the maximum, I can't relax see, I'm
Hype as a hypochondriac cause the rap be one
Hell of a antidote, something you can't smoke
More than dope, you're trying to move away but you can't, you're broke
More than cracked up, you should have backed up
For those that act up need to be more than smacked up
Any entertainer, I got a torture chamber
One on one and I'm the remainder
So close your eyes and hold your breath
And I'mma hit ya with the blow of death
Before you go, you'll remember ya seen
The fiend of a microphone, I'm the microphone fiend
The microphone fiend
Microphone Fiend by - Eric B & Rakim
**Rakim is a Supreme Favorite lyricist of mine and this rap is
1 of My Top 5 favorite Rhymes of All Time!**
Not to be out shined his partner in crime Eric was a mastermind at the time on the steel wheels that underline all of their tracks. Take a moment and recognize and respect the raw untamed talent that these two present.
Montana Sep 2013
I’ve had writer’s block for months.

Then a five-word cliché unleashed a torrent of
thoughtsfeelingswordsphrases
Emotions
Pent-up for so long.

And the best part is,
You're wrong, babe.
It’s not you, it’s me.

And it always has been.
Chaotic Melodic Aug 2010
Tear out my eyes
repainting them shades of purple puke
and send me off back to work
Snip the curious child
from my gut
and paint the walls pink with his feet
pour drano into my ears
so that i may not have to think anymore
lobotomize my fingernail biting fetishes
till i only get hard-on's from my skull
dragging its skin across the pavement
you pitiful excuse for a poet
you hope to dazzle them with dayglo frosting
caked like mold in the corners of your mouth
you sick hopeless perfectionist
knitting cellophane walls
of hands slapping your face
so you can close your eyes
and lose yourself in the confines
of your stalagmites
you with your cut and paste philosophies
which leave gaping holes
stretching across everybody's pupils
huh?
exactly you ******* pustule of plastic bubbles
you are an empty bud
no flower could rise from soil as rank as yours
no love will ever find comfort in a heart as prickly as yours
i can only be ashamed
that i share your body
i'm better off getting aborted
next time you sneeze
so that i could infect another's fragile flesh
passing our sick parasite
at least something of yours will be left
for others to cherish
© Cory McQueen
Cunning Linguist Sep 2017
Muthafucka I squall,
**** with me.
Bawl so hard, aneurysms burst;
Call it apoplexy
Uh, ***** I rage!
With the squad in the whip
Yeah we goin places, ayye

Up to the trap.
Insert rap
Got the gwap
We in the kitchen cooking crack
I'm like assuh dude. Nomsayin?
This wordsmith, *****
I'm wild & sign my autographs with crayons

I'm stimulated got my face wrung.
Getting my sip on,
***** what the **** u trip on?
Ugh.

Worry about whats in my drink I'm lit for days son!
Its been a grip;
U Catch me slippin'
I'm out this *****,
Dont gotta stay long

Whip that yayo,
White like mayo,
Rhymes on fleek -
****** your fleet,
cops on my payroll

Sick of the same ol'
Every day yo.
PC ******, cut yourself
Mainline some Drano.

Fire to the rock, then I'm stone cold!
Slurrin my words;
Got the glock in my holster
Uh, & fam I'll flash my **** at your home girls.
No **** to give lit 24/7,
You want that beef I got it kosher (skrrr)

I got the sheets and the lotion
& the bud I got is om nom
U cause a stink, I got commotion
don't wanna face
that skunk ****,
That **** is potent

Mixed some jet fuel in my lean -
Now the fire I spit
Is hot enough
to melt through steel beams
Rap game's fake,
I devastate
March to the guillotine -

Don't hesitate its make or break
I smoke the dankest memes.

Ugh.. I'm 100 about that hanky-pank
uh. & U won't find me
where that loud pack ain't.
Pop these shots off
Go bang-bang
I rep these streets,
Bleed OG
Whilst floppin' my dang-lang.

You scream you got racks
But your ****'s old.
No slack you're broke -
***** whack bro.
You've sold your soul
Blood inks the contract tho
& I'm Diablo.

Headfirst,
Victims from this wicked verse
Burst into flames
Inside this wretched furnace
Super earnest,
This my sermon,
Y'all gon learn this
I'm that serpent
******' sinister minister
Mr.-*******-Your-Sister
I slither in it a little
Now I'm in utero, for real tho

Til I'm old and withered,
And my body's brittle
With a 40,
I'm in my underwear
Wheelchairin' round
Screaming
I am the liquor!

It dont get no sicker,
So just come bump to this -
All the uglies in the world
To violate with my fists.
Fulfilling all my deepest
Darkest wishes

I'm vicious.
Some say I'm savage;
Wreaking havoc,
Combustion proliferating the madness -
Ashes to ashes
As the blunt makes some passes
2 lit 4 life
consciousness starts to lapse fam

Faded/

Stay lit through the day trip
Not enough,
where the plug is?
Attractin' wealth
stack em hundreds
Slander me hold your tongue,
***** 'fore I cut it...
fresh prince, catch my lil' smith
im going west son,
railing through the clips
get rekt'd check your privilege
White as ****, zen master flux
**** I'm killin it Reid-Dickless.
Quit your *******', I'm in the kitchen whippin' it chu see the flick of the wrist?

My attempt at being intentionally dumb af/mainstream rap nowadays
Tongue tied on double speak
I’m counting off diseased freckles
Waiting on a fragment to leak
This house sure sounds bleak

Miss Mary found hysteria
In a pillbox prescription
Developed quite the predilection
And overriding addiction

Her infant Michael drank Drano,
He found under the sink
Life stripped in a blink
Should have had a child lock, one would think

Arthur vanished with the birth of a daughter
He thought the whole notion was too big a bother
Left the girl alone in life
To struggle though adolescence without a father

Claire, the good one, wasn’t without her faults
All she did was babel
About her family life or lowly rabble
Confucius orders you to cease this gabble

Ear warped on endless noise
I’m counting off diseased freckles
Thinking up ******* ploys
Or perhaps I should just lose my poise
less than twenty four hours after dashing off a poem
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis,
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel

   from the **** of this guy
which bout with ****** obstruction
   found me doubled over
   with lower abdominal distress

   whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright (with back padded with pillows
   against the cellar brick wall),
   thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh

and managed to muster the means to bare
   frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
   the Acme brand Metamucil,
   which akin to drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
   supposedly loosening the stools,

   which optimism (product
   didst earn claim to fame) generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
   to cease livingsocial would try

humph enjoining
   this lvii year old married male
   to cede victory
   to the grim reaper, who would vie

as winner de jure
   to this common fellow invoking libretto
   ohm resistant understudy waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
   without successful defecation

   despite the oppressive urge to bolster this uriah
heap of balled up and tuckered i.e. pooped out
   five foot and ten inches of lovely bones
   thence mouthing retraction
   of former thought to cease existing,

though a non-bull lever
   in any power broker qua mankind
   relief at long last
   provided posterior answered prayer
   yet, this scrivener scrutinizes
   his recurring pain in the *** jagged torture
   and asks
   a rhetorical one word question "WHY"?
less than twenty four hours after dashing off a poem
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis,
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel

   from the **** of this guy
which bout with ****** obstruction
   found me doubled over
   with lower abdominal distress

   whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright (with back padded with pillows
   against the cellar brick wall),
   thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh

and managed to muster the means to bare
   frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
   the Acme brand Metamucil,
   which akin to drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
   supposedly loosening the stools,

   which optimism (product
      didst earn claim to fame) generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
   to cease livingsocial would try

humph enjoining
   this lvii year old married male
   to cede victory
   to the grim reaper, who would vie

as winner de jure
   to this common fellow invoking libretto
   ohm resistant understudy waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
   without successful defecation

   despite the oppressive urge to bolster this uriah
heap of balled up and tuckered i.e. pooped out
   five foot and ten inches of lovely bones
   thence mouthing retraction
   of former thought to cease existing,

though a non-bull lever
   in any power broker qua mankind
   relief at long last
   provided posterior answered prayer
   yet, this scrivener scrutinizes
   his recurring pain in the *** jagged torture
   and asks
   a rhetorical one word question "WHY"?
Poe Reimer Jan 2017
We're past the election, the strangest one yet,
like a whole country suffering from oxygen debt.
The first was the woman, the one with the name
that says your next helping is more of the same.
The other, just horrid, and toxic for sure,
though sometimes it's Drano that cleans out the sewer.
We heard their opinions and pondered their stands;
Benghazi's Emailer lost out to Small Hands.
But that's in the past; we're surviving the blow.
We've got a new president running the show.
So, let's get behind him. Yeah, go Putin go!
a worse hellish fate than perdition really *****

As of early morning
today - September 8th, 2022,
I could not but barely move
mine whole body felt
analogous to sluggish mollusk
frequent constipation found me
doubled over in gastrointestinal agony
as if elephant stomping on tummy
or red livid with rage.

I've re: created how bull
heaver in fiber figuratively ****** his tusk
into lower abdominal area dawn to dusk
ah...voila... hence subsequently
blessed natural laxative,
the magic of Daily Fiber
100% natural psyllium husk
also known as metamucil.

Once again sphincter muscle(s)
spasmodically malfunctioned awry
whew suppository unnecessary
despite gastrointestinal stoppage
alimentary canal thwarted
porcelain goddess battlecry
at least seventy two hour time span
lapsed whereby big boy wanted to cry
explaining how yours truly
felt he would die
an undertaking malaise

found me experiencing
physical duress vis a vis,
a bowel movement,
wherein waste unable to expel
from the **** of this guy,
which bout with ****** obstruction
found me doubled over
with lower abdominal distress
whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright

(with back padded with pillows
against the cellar brick wall),
thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh
and managed on a previous occasion
to muster the means to bare
frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
the Acme brand Metamucil,
which akin to Drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
supposedly loosening the stools

which optimism (product
didst earn claim to fame)
generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
to cease LivingSocial would try
humph enjoining lxiii
year old married male
to cede victory to the grim reaper,
who would vie
as winner de jure

to this common fellow invoking libretto
ohm resistant understudy
waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
without successful defecation
despite the oppressive urge
to bolster this Uriah
heep of balled up and tuckered out
five foot and ten inches of lovely bones,
thence mouthing retraction

of former thought to cease existing
though a non-bull lever
in any power broker qua mankind
relief at long last
provided posterior answered prayer
yet, this wordsmith
scrutinizes his recurring
pain in the *** jagged torture
and asks a rhetorical
one word question "WHY"?

Well now... monumental
poetic challenge recap,
I now craftily abbreviate
(think clogged toilet
synonymous with blockage)
waste matter after days did accumulate
regarding ****** blockage to alleviate
thus imagine impossible
airy mission to defecate
which debilitating scenario

(mine) frequent accursed fate
frequently recurring more often
as yours truly ages
i.e. latter day saint
Matthew Scott got older
****** affliction compromised me
ordinary easy going demeanor to boot
disallowing, disenabling, and not permitting
me - effecting, emulating, and exhaling
Tony the tiger's catchword grrrrrreat

if queried about my constitution
when alas... absolute ecstasy found me
expelling bowel movement with effort
weighing approximately 0.71428571 stone
though relieved, nevertheless
the toilet bowl clogged,
prompting me to correct historical records
on two accounts despite
causing potential ruckus
disaster buffs may incriminate
nsync notion huge bowel movement

(mine) took down (analogous
voyage to bottom of sea) toto Lusitania
and actually additionally
caused separate incident
complex edifice (think Titanic)
both sturdy ships of state
former rendered, lifted, foundered...
latter purportedly crashing
into iceberg invariably causing
rising sea levels courtesy
melting glacier (size of Florida) weight.
Jamison Bell Jan 2021
Gonna snort some drano
I can explain though
Just want to turn my thoughts
To snow so
I can forget
Or rather split
My memories like atoms
Since I’ve had em
They’re soft cells
I can’t resell
Waking me up at three
Like a doorbell
Whiskey saturation
It’s like mental *******
The same **** stories
Not worth infatuation
So I figure a lil poison
To **** the noise and
Bring a lil peace
And put a cease
To these dreams
That just won’t stop
At least forty eight hour time span
lapsed whereby big boy wanted to cry
explaining how yours truly
felt he would die
an undertaking malaise
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis,
a bowel movement,
wherein waste unable to expel
from the **** of this guy,
which bout with ****** obstruction
found me doubled over
with lower abdominal distress
whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright
(with back padded with pillows
against the cellar brick wall),
thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh
and managed on a previous occasion
to muster the means to bare
frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
the Acme brand Metamucil,
which akin to Drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
supposedly loosening the stools,

which optimism (product
didst earn claim to fame) generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
to cease LivingSocial would try
humph enjoining this lxii year old married male
to cede victory to the grim reaper, who would vie
as winner de jure
to this common fellow invoking libretto
ohm resistant understudy waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
without successful defecation
despite the oppressive urge to bolster this Uriah
heap of balled up and tuckered out
five foot and ten inches of lovely bones,
thence mouthing retraction
of former thought to cease existing
though a non-bull lever
in any power broker qua mankind
relief at long last
provided posterior answered prayer
yet, this scrivener
scrutinizes his recurring
pain in the *** jagged torture
and asks a rhetorical one word question "WHY"?

As of early August 20th, 2021-
I  finally moved bowels but...
mine whole body felt
analogous to sluggish mollusk
stasis of lower bowel found yours truly
doubled over in gastrointestinal agony
as if elephant or red (livid with rage)
bull ****** his tusk into mine ****
ah...voila... hence subsequently I tout
blessed magic of laxatives
Amitiza, Dulcolax, and Miralax
relieving lower abdominal and ******
discomfort agonizing me dawn to dusk.

Upon swallowing first or second named laxative
or sprinkling Mix-in powder pack,
within 8+ ounces of water,
not aesthetically pleasing major drawback
foisting human waste heavy as a full coalsack
sometimes burned and scorched black
movement came swift, on par how fast
snaky Mister liquid Plumber doth attack
obstructed ***** bowl.

Well now... monumental poetic challenge,
I now craftily abbreviate
(think clogged toilet synonymous with blockage)
waste matter after days did accumulate
ready to apply corkerasp
regarding ****** blockage to alleviate.

— The End —