You see I am a silent Tao more words count less especially in this letter,
And when you're finished reading it you can laugh at me if it makes you feel any better.  
Which is okay with me but what's not is that you all just get to keep on living,
Without me with you during all of your tomorrows so this note is my forgiving;
To my family and friends who have hurt me and treated me wrong...
But maybe no fault of yours but still it hurt and didn't even make me strong.
To all except my daughter who needs no forgiveness from me she's done to me nothing wrong,
Unlike I did to her her whole life but it's like I said...because I'm not very strong.
A coward really!  But I'm not gay, a ****** or flamboyant,
It doesn't really matter though anyway I still am a dissapointment.
So I deserve your ridicule I'm no good to others and in my life it has shown,
I don't expect you to except me to forgive me or to even to condone...
This "Pipeline Boy" who in my youth which is how I was raised and I thought it was right,
From behind closed doors was I taught to be feminine and ladylike.
I tried to live my life straight marrying three lovely ladies..."myself" I tried to convert,
I helped to make a little girl (it was my crowning achievement in life) my marriages didn't work.
Attempting to ask for forgiveness I was rushed and sorta fell,
Falling fifty-five feet breaking twenty-one bones and on my way to hell.
Trying to forgive myself in front of God on my way down...
"I'm Still Falling!" were my very last thoughts just before my body hit the ground.
You see I've been treated like a ***** all my life by most these men,
I don't know if it's theirs or mine to own...this unforgivable sin.
So now I partake in the world's oldest profession,
Woman don't do what's done to me being a women's the only way for me to get to Heaven!
So now I am Robin Ashley and hope for as long as I am you'll be my friend,
Because It no longer feels right for me to go around living life just to pretend.
My last name stays the same so she won't feel I abandoned her again,
For she's the only one in this world that I do not want to offend.
So I'll live my life in cognito causing you all no consequence nor strife,
When you're apalled by this letter remember it's not yours-but it's "My" life!
I apologize for posting such an obscene  'b l of distaste,
I'm just so **** tired of living my life with a mask on my face.
I don't know how my family found me here on facebook I guess it really doesn't matter,
My name is now Robin Ashley Latham and its because it makes me less sadder!

     Robin Ashley

What is it about you?
No adjective will suffice.
sweet, and subtle.
incredibly mysterious,
yet so easy to figure.
i'm apalled, in awe, shocked at your presence.
tattoo your  persona in my mind,
it will be there an eternity.
i want this forever, for all time.

I am made entirely out of glass, if you look hard enough you can see the cracks gleaming through from my insides and begging you to fix me from the outside in. I am not something to be forgotten and yet I always am. I am put inside that box without newspaper to keep my edges safe or bubble wrap to hold me in place and even still those precautions will never be as secure  as your hands once were to me.
I'm getting colder with every piece of me that bleeds into the abyss and will never be seen again. By the time we get home next I will have lost another piece of me that you once cherished more than yourself. I'm apalled that you just let me fall away from you so easily when you once told me you adored me more than you adored most things. You polished me daily and put me on the highest shelf, I was the largest priority to you until I started falling apart again and you found other statuettes of glass to keep your company as you waited for me to glue myself together again.
But that's not how this works. You can't just collect knick knacks like it's your hobby, and tell them you hold such a substantial amount of affection for them and move onto the next without even telling the prior that you were sorry you broke them but their needs were no longer important... or perhaps never were.
As you caress the curves of every other goddess you set your eyes on and you become overwhelmed by the beauty of them all, I hope you shatter under the pressure like you shattered the rest of us. I hope you come to the realization that the amount of perfection that you receive in that specific juncture is not your decision any longer.

The day seemed like any other
i thought everything was the same
until you came and passed bye without saying hi
so i walked up to you
and looked you right in the eye
but i was apalled by what i saw
because there was nothing there
like you couldn't see me or didnt even care
so i pressed my lips against your's
expecting us to still be a pair
but you didn't feel a thing
and i felt this heart renching pain
as you walked through my body
like I didn't exist
i watched as you walked away
thinking of what to say
as you walked over to him
i started to scream
i yelled everything that i thought would make you stay
i gave it my all
but you to didn't even twitch
like you couldn't hear my heartfelt call
yelling from the middle of the room
suprised that no one else seemed to notice
i was suddenly forced to face my doom
as i looked back to you with him
i noticed the world was a little dim
right when i saw you kiss
it was at that moment
that i was able to see the truth
see, I didnt even know
but i was a ghost
and i had died long ago

I have been a dreadful man,
I have done despicable deeds
To someone I love,
Unwarrantable things,

Things of which I am rightly
And deeply ashamed,
And I could easily argue
The case that I be left,

But I am changed,
Apalled at my past and
Perceive that what I have
Is love - true love - real love,

Love that is bigger than me,
Love that matters more
Than pride or overwhelming
Confidence,

But that is all about me,
And with my history I
Really do not matter
Nor deserve a chance,

However I also see the beauty
And the value of us,
The enormity of our relationship,
To both of us,

And it is that which drives
My refusal to quit,
Makes loss of pride and dignity
All worthwhile,

Because together we are wonderful,
Together we can rule a world,
A life of our creation,

Together - and this the vital thing,
We can be that loving family
For each other
That we neither knew before,

And for that,
For you,
For us,
I will do whatever it takes

Fingers grip the chain and they're pulling me down.
Just a little guilt, now watch me drown.
A couple of little things, they connect to make a crown.
Next one phoning in is doubt with a echoing ring.
Resonating across all possibilities.
Tinnitus at it's finest now my hearing is absurd.
In the middle of it all anger anchors me still.
A ragin' cajun and I am certain you're apalled.
In text and index measured in overthink.
Rights point to wrongs.
Mistakes made valid, faux pas made factual.
All this leading to the paroxysm thumb.
This forms the grip tied to every link.
A chain so deadly it attached in a blink.
The chain is deadly because you think.