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"agan" poems
I wonder 'oo and wot 'e was, That 'Un I got so slick. I couldn't see 'is face because The night was 'ideous thick. I just made out among the black A blinkin' wedge o' white; Then biff! I guess I got 'im crack -- The man I killed last night. I wonder if account o' me Some ***** will go ***** And 'eaps o' lives will never be, Because 'e's stark and dead? Or if 'is missis damns the war, And by some candle light, Tow-headed kids are prayin' for The Fritz I copped last night. I wonder, 'struth, I wonder why I 'ad that 'orful dream? I saw up in the giddy sky The gates o' God agleam; I saw the gates o' 'eaven shine Wiv everlastin' light: And then . . . I knew that I'd got mine, As 'e got 'is last night. Aye, bang beyond the broodin' mists Where spawn the mother stars, I 'ammered wiv me ****** fists Upon them golden bars; I 'ammered till a devil's doubt Fair froze me wiv affright: To fink wot God would say about The bloke I corpsed last night. I 'ushed; I wilted wiv despair, When, like a rosy flame, I sees a angel standin' there 'Oo calls me by me name. 'E 'ad such soft, such shiny eyes; 'E 'eld 'is 'and and smiled; And through the gates o' Paradise 'E led me like a child. 'E led me by them golden palms Wot 'ems that jeweled street; And seraphs was a-singin' psalms, You've no ideer 'ow sweet; Wiv cheroobs crowdin' closer round Than peas is in a pod, 'E led me to a shiny mound Where beams the throne o' God. And then I 'ears God's werry voice: "Bill 'agan, 'ave no fear. Stand up and glory and rejoice For 'im 'oo led you 'ere." And in a nip I seemed to see: Aye, like a flash o' light, My angel pal I knew to be The chap I plugged last night. Now, I don't claim to understand -- They calls me Bonehead Bill; They shoves a rifle in me 'and, And show me 'ow to **** Me job's to risk me life and limb, But . . . be it wrong or right, This cross I'm makin', it's for 'im, The cove I croaked last night.
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Bonehead Bill
I wonder 'oo and wot 'e was, That 'Un I got so slick. I couldn't see 'is face because The night was 'ideous thick. I just made out among the black A blinkin' wedge o' white; Then biff! I guess I got 'im crack -- The man I killed last night. I wonder if account o' me Some ***** will go ***** And 'eaps o' lives will never be, Because 'e's stark and dead? Or if 'is missis damns the war, And by some candle light, Tow-headed kids are prayin' for The Fritz I copped last night. I wonder, 'struth, I wonder why I 'ad that 'orful dream? I saw up in the giddy sky The gates o' God agleam; I saw the gates o' 'eaven shine Wiv everlastin' light: And then . . . I knew that I'd got mine, As 'e got 'is last night. Aye, bang beyond the broodin' mists Where spawn the mother stars, I 'ammered wiv me ****** fists Upon them golden bars; I 'ammered till a devil's doubt Fair froze me wiv affright: To fink wot God would say about The bloke I corpsed last night. I 'ushed; I wilted wiv despair, When, like a rosy flame, I sees a angel standin' there 'Oo calls me by me name. 'E 'ad such soft, such shiny eyes; 'E 'eld 'is 'and and smiled; And through the gates o' Paradise 'E led me like a child. 'E led me by them golden palms Wot 'ems that jeweled street; And seraphs was a-singin' psalms, You've no ideer 'ow sweet; Wiv cheroobs crowdin' closer round Than peas is in a pod, 'E led me to a shiny mound Where beams the throne o' God. And then I 'ears God's werry voice: "Bill 'agan, 'ave no fear. Stand up and glory and rejoice For 'im 'oo led you 'ere." And in a nip I seemed to see: Aye, like a flash o' light, My angel pal I knew to be The chap I plugged last night. Now, I don't claim to understand -- They calls me Bonehead Bill; They shoves a rifle in me 'and, And show me 'ow to **** Me job's to risk me life and limb, But . . . be it wrong or right, This cross I'm makin', it's for 'im, The cove I croaked last night.
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64
s. l. .. w. he tells you n. i h he loves you o. n. i. and he's r. e . l. ,. quitting t. s . e... today, and the lines get longer but he still wants you to stay and when he R E L A P S E S and does too much too soon and you're holding him and you're screaming into the phone and they keep asking h o w much did he do? and you're lying and you snort another line and you put down the phone and when the police (!!!) knock on the door you have nodded out and he is gone and you are bleeding and you open your palms and you clutched the razor so tight and you cut up another pill and you snort the pill and the door breaks down and you cry and you swear you don't know how much he took and they tell you he is not coming back and you blame yo ur self blame yo ur self blame yo ur self blame yo ursel f an dyo u f o rgot h ow mu c h (h o w mch dd i tk agan?) a nd yo u colla ps a nd you're gone and the lines don't matter anymore . . . . .
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Jun 5, 2014
Jun 5, 2014 at 9:22 PM UTC
oxycontin; a ****** love story
it's completely silent throughout the house at 6am but then agan that might be my dad i hear only the clocks are ticking in the candlelight that smells of pine don't turn on the music for the silence is speaking and listening carefully to me the vents blow their warm breeze and i am comforted enough in this home where i feel like an outsider early mornings are not the usual but 3am's where i stay up until i pass out but at least in quiet my life is at a standstill since i can't make decisions
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Jun 21, 2013
Jun 21, 2013 at 10:47 PM UTC
early mornings
Living in the shadows of the past Watered down, added color A mirage of what once was Will it drive me insane Before I escape this pain Take it all away Lock it up Keep it safe Until it rips me open again ...until it rips me open agan
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Sep 30, 2016
Sep 30, 2016 at 11:06 PM UTC
Rip
He had a heart attack.  I gave him cpr. When I rolled him over to clear his airways, beacuse he puked in my mouth, I therw my back out. The ambulance took 45 min to get there. He died in my arms. I watched his deep purple face take his last ragged breath. I lost my everything in a matter of moments. My best friend, my confidant, my roommate, the best father to my children anyone could ever ask for, my rock; just gone! He's gone and I can't ever hug him again. I can't tell him I love him any more n hear him say ,"I love you more." I can never again respond "nope". no more family trips, no more weird conversations in the middle of the night or  early in the mornings. He's ******* gone! I cant sleep, it all replays in my mind as im watching him die over and over agan seeing his lifeless eyes and swollen tongue, and the color purple, I used to love purple but now it will forever haunt my waking and sleeping dreams; and im so not ok!
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Jun 29, 2017
Jun 29, 2017 at 9:17 PM UTC
My everything/ I'm so not ok
What the hell did we fight for? Did we drop our helmets at the door? At the door? Just like the Romans, The British, The Soviets before, now we died in the desert, just like the forces before. Forces before. When the sun shone high we pulled the troops and brought em back home to Yankee Doodle land, while we sacrificed the women to the Taliban. You can kiss education, hope and civil rights goodbye. The sun has set once again so, so long Siagon and Goodbye agan Afghanistan. Now the citizen fled to the airports trying to hitch a ride on the outside of a plane, gripping that cold metal to their chest and hoping they fall over Afghanistan, rather be dead from a fall than alive over there again. It's a sad state of affairs when we start a war and skip out on the check, Vietnam springs to mind, so let's hang our head and give thanks to Bush Obama Trump Biden I hope it was worth it? Was it really ******* worth it? I don't think so Not at all.
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Aug 17, 2021
Aug 17, 2021 at 10:23 AM UTC
So Long Siagon, Goodbye Again Afghanistan