I am fearful of my future
so regretful of my past
and as far as the present goes,
I don't think it will last

once a boy told me my eyes remind him of the ocean and i thought to myself what the **** is this boy high on. he then continued to explain that my eyes arent the kind of coffee brown that you could stare at while you slowly stir. my eyes werent the brown dirt of forests that he would set on fire just lovingly watch them burn. my eyes are like the ocean not because they are blue but because "have you ever tried to describe the ocean to a room full of blind?" he asked and i was still not sure what he was onto "well you cant because they cant grasp the idea the serenity of that picture you are describing to them because there is so much to it and thats what it is like with your eyes i can never fully grasp what it is but i can never gaze too long because it feels like they'd swallow me whole and i would always imagine what it would be like to describe your eyes to a room full of blind" then i understood what love was.

when we reminisce about our childhoods
we laugh at the lies
the kind of lies we don't fully regret
but there is one lie that is just too cruel for me to forget
it wasn't curiousity  that killed the cat
it was the hand that trapped it in an airtight bag

"Another morning without you.
I don't know if i can make it through another day.
You've been here so many days before,
now i just stare, and wish you come to open my closed door.
It's been Gray Days since you left me,
My heart, and soul lost, not knowing where they should be.
As i sit alone with these bare walls that once held memories
of you, and me, pictures of places when in love, and free.
Everywhere i walk my imagination feels your their,
hanging on to my broken heart, that needs to be repaired.
And the sun don't shine.
I stop, surrounded by all the Gray around me,
with tears starting to fall from my face.
Take Away The Gray Days.
Let me see the sun again to bring me back to the days of you, and me.
Please Take Away The Gray Days, and give me back how it used to be.
For now i'll just wait, and pray that you,
Take Away The Gray Days."

Sitting at my desk, staring down at words.
Knowing that they mean nothing if they are never heard.
Wondering and thinking, what they might mean to you.
If you had of heard them, which you will never do.
Dotting I's with hearts, and making perfect lines.
The scripture is so beautiful, though i don't know why.
For you will never see this, so you will never know.
Because as soon as i have finished, in the garbage it will go.

One day i'll be brave.
One day i'll be wise.
One day i'll be able to look you in the eye.
Maybe i'll just say it,and use my voice for once.
But until i get that courage, i'll rip this paper up.