i say it ironically because *******.
...
i hate swearing i hate irony i love you a lot it's hard to keep on avoiding the things that crave me the most that i crave the most i'm not as sure minded as i seem i don't ever know how i feel which is dangerous because every "i love you" isn't necessarily true even if i think it is people have stopped mattering only time matters i don't have much left things are going downhill i'm rolling down a hill like i did when i was little except i can't stop there is no bottom the thorns in the grass are piercing my skin without permission
and and and and and i forgot to say and
connect me to you like the "and" that connects "you" and "i".

a lot of things happen when i decide to avoid what's supposed to fix me.
i'm lost in a sea of beer and cigarette fish swim in the surrounding waters.
somehow, this whole concoction is aflame.
i wonder why i'm not being burned alive yet.

i begged you to beat me up because i thought i deserved it

i searched up the meaning of your name, and i learned that it means "beloved".
apparently that's the meaning of my name as well.

i passed a woman walking her dog while on my evening stroll the other day.
her blonde hair curled at the ends, smile-lines appeared as if there were drawn in with a 2b pencil and her eyes shone like fresh uranium.
words like small, big, skinny, fat, ugly, and pretty shouldn't be used to describe beauty or lack of thereof.

You don't even know how to clean up your own mess.