I was lost among the shadows
Clawing and crawling on my knees
Until finally I opened my eyes

I can’t wait to get back to me
I lost myself for sometime
But I’ll never lose who I am

This is what it is
Running in my dreams
Hands crushing flowers
To smell what it means

I climb branches to peak
No fear of the fall
A glimpse of your face
Just to lose it all

I'm in these frail states
Life and death
Don't know which one begins
While the other one ends

I’m looking for a place to settle
A comforting pillow to lay my head
A place where I’m not alone

Windows broken from the inside
Doors sealed with a purpose
Feeling cold roaming these streets

My feet are bruised from scattered mistakes
Every house is different but none are a home
The feeling of giving up creeps behind me

I’ve been knocking on empty houses
Turned away by careless looks
But you stood there signaling me

Will you take me in your home?
Give me a place to sleep
I’ll lay my head on your heart to keep

My hand placed on your chest
Your eyes closed
Closed off from me

Lost in your thoughts
Ignoring my existence
Reciprocity doesn’t exist in this room

I second guessed it all
Baby girl, don’t cry now, later
Sedated by the stillness of your skin

I’m just another body resting
On a still pale corpse
Hoping my touch will awaken life in you

You could be hiding from me
Or are you really like this?
No arm around me to raise my head to see

You were emotionless
Off in your world
I was barely hanging on

At some point
Everything stops

I wanna be at a new level
I’m tired of this compulsiveness

Need to stop reading into this
Need to focus on baby girl
I gotta make a life or two when I get back

Listen, I’m gonna go back to me
I’m gonna peel back your skin
Let it rest in the sun to bake

I’ll let you continue on
Thinking you got the life here

I’ve got a little love left to give
It’s too late now

Pick up the pieces of your skin
Try putting them back together
It’ll never be the same

I ventured into this
Not knowing the purpose
Was it to play the leading lady in your world?

Your  agenda of curiosity
But in part, you warned me
I guess I played the role well

I took it a step further
Hoping, praying, imagining
All actions that can lead to ruin

Some will say it was all a game
Others think it wasn’t meant to be
What matters to me is what I will become

You continue towards your path
You made a fork in mine with a dead end
My hands shake as I pave a new road

There’s something about your sad eyes
They’ll never tell me the story
Despite what I know, you played the part well

I want you to tell me this is over
Release these words from your quiet mouth
I need this closure from you

The silence sparks sleeplessness
I don’t know what this was
But I’ll be missing it

I don’t want to be pushy
But you’re bringing out the worst in me
I’ll ask you the simple question

Tell me if this is the final chapter
Should I drop the pen and let ink dry?
I can’t leave you without a final goodbye

A part of me wants to continue
But I know this is the end
I was looking to understand you, not change you

Maybe this has been over for you
Your silence gives it all away
I should know better but I’m a hopeful soul

I can’t leave this heavy door open
My arms can’t take the pressure
My shoulders can’t support the frame

Understand it needs to be closed
I’ll need to lock it before it’s opened again
I can’t let these feelings loose into the world

I know I’m being desperate
I need to work on myself
But just this one time, please tell me what I need to hear

We pressed into each other
Sticking like hot glue
Mixing our minds and bodies
Encapsulated by the residue

As we tore ourselves apart
Remnants stayed behind
Leaving marks on our existence
Forever engraving our minds

I feel these pieces of you
Blending into my awareness
No matter how hard I pull
I was unprepared and defenseless

Where do I start?
You’re my rock, my pillar of hope
From the moment you shared with me
Our fate was sealed for this lifetime

Your Taurean dedication is unmatched
You don’t shy away from the truth
I openly admire your stubborn ways
You’ve never let me be other than myself

There were times I was absent
Left you to soak in life’s disappointments
Don’t take it to heart my beautiful blue eyed friend
I’ve always kept you safe in a corner of my spotless mind

Our laughter brings me right eye tears
There’s only understanding in our sacred world
That’s why we keep coming back to each other
We can’t live without being true to ourselves

You fight through life’s battles
While I stand and give you the ammunition
I lay and dwell on life’s failures
While you lay beside me and give me reason to get up

Judgement doesn’t exist when we’re together
We layout the carpet for the good, bad and ugly
You’re the sister that lifts my chin up
Looks me in the eye and tells me, keep going

Your sensibility guides me through my struggles
We began with sharing and will end with it in old age
As we navigate through life’s labyrinth of unpredictability
We hold on to our friendship that makes the journey worth it

I’m asking for peace
A moment of silence
Join my hands together
Praying for guidance

I look up to the sky
Visions of your face remain
My eyes burn with grace
I let go of this fleeting pain

I’ve reached the peak
Peering back down
Letting my past remnants fall
As I drape my silk green gown

From the beginning
Something new
Bounded by words

Mental strings attached
Sweet cords exchanged
Sounds gliding with the sunlight

Sleep doesn’t matter
My words travel far to reach you
Burying themselves in your mind

Settled but understood?
New wavelengths hit me
With a force that twists my cords

When you speak
I search for the real you
It’s the start of something new

I’m coming back to you
I always do
No one compares to you
You know that

We’re bound by the strongest invisible rope
We venture to opposite ends
Lose ourselves at times
And swing back to each other in the end

I can’t explain what we have
It’s beyond this world and many more
Cultural boundaries hinder our actions
But no one can stop the unseen

Hoping we can finally rest
My face close to yours
Giving you my breath
I’m inhaling yours

They can give you what you want
Flesh pleasures for days
But never what you really need
A home full of loving ways

Looking back on us
I’ll choose when to leave you
Let me just soak in this pain
And with time I’ll make do

You lay still as I watch you
Eyes closed, hands a part
I start with shaping your neck
Rubbing away your heavy eyelids

Outlining the shape of your rounded eyebrows
Touching the curves of your small mouth
Brushing my fingertips on your chin
Sweeping my hands through your thick black hair

I glance at the side your long face
Examining every tiny detail
I notice an anomaly hidden by ****** bristles
I curiously uncover the brown dotted treasure

Eyes closed this whole time
Please look at me once
I massaged in my feelings for you
Did you feel what I did?

I lay my head on your cold shoulder
My left hand glides down your chest
It stops at the colored inked eye
My fingertips motion movements around the lines

I covered the eye with my left index finger
What do you see now?
I release the pressure
Your eyes are still closed

I continue making shapes across your chest
I place my palm over your heart
I want to light it up
But your eyes are still closed

I take your left hand in mine
It’s soaked with moisture
You raise you right to place them together
Your hands glisten as I admire them

I look up at you once more
Your eyes are still closed
Are you here with me?
I shaped you in my mind

Every waking moment
Trapped in memories
Haunted by your words
My eyes itch and burn
It’s not over for me
This is the beginning
Feeling the what-ifs
Marks layer my chest
What have you done
Will anyone save me?

Should of never let my fingers linger
But I can’t help myself
I let my words flow to you
You caught them one by one
Now I’m trapped in the world we created
I was in my head dreaming
With nightmares lingering
Afraid of loosing all of this
My mouth won’t move when you're near me
For these words that I script
They are only released through my fingertips
I desperately want to tell you everything
But I find myself only speaking to your reactions
And you’ll never hear what you really mean to me

I’ll be leaving soon
Do you know which day?

I’ll be taking my heart back from this lifeless land
Will you feel the beating?

I’ll be keeping these thoughts about you to myself
Will you wonder about it?

I’ll bury our past memories in our homeland
Will you dig them up?

I’ll fly through the air and sprinkle my sweet tears
Will you catch them in your mouth to taste?

I’ll land in the west and let go of the east wind
Will you let that soft smoky breeze give you life again?

I’ll be thinking about you
Will you remember me?

That eye on your chest
Does it see past me?
Or does it see the real me?

You cherish each line
The grooves that form the shape
It reaches for your heart

As my fingertips touch your skin
The colors vibrate beneath my hand
This eye is watching my every move

It’s a conspiracy to think
Who this belongs to
You wince as I release my touch

Am I just a tool for you?
I hope not
This eye will always follow me

Such a fool to fall into your mouth trap
I gave so much of me only to be eaten
A twisted taste from the beginning

I helped myself in and you clasped harder
I knew this but I only hoped for the best
Planned your meal for the midday

I went beyond what was needed
I blame myself for volunteering
You were just hungry for a foreign meal

You slowly chewed my words
From first letter to period, chomping away
Masticating every part of me

The juice running down your mouth
Satiating your taste and wonderment of something new
I’m left in your fermented mouth ready to be swallowed

I land into your full belly
Surrounded by previous snacks
I’m covered in gooey regret

Am I to blame for this mistake?
Let me rest here for a second
I’m slowly losing myself

I’m ready to show you what lies within me
No soul has ever ventured here
I’m gonna serve this specialty to you

But tell me one thing
Are you all in for this because I need you
I’m looking to plant a garden of desires

It took me time to find myself
Heart opened, examined and pumped
I love myself to love you

I call out to you as mine
Show you these curves you need to handle
Make your eyes roll back and see the future

I’ll examine every piece of you
Detailed attention to where you need it
I’m gonna love the pain out of you

Watch me as I come for you
Let me satisfy what you never knew existed
I promise this won’t hurt my love

Let me ride your mind throughout the night
Gently wipe away past scars from my back
Lay your body over my soul and speak to it

Our kisses will water the seeds of our garden
Silent touches will ignite sparks between our bodies
The sounds we make will echo to the full moon and back

We only exist in this world created by our intentions
Hold my hand as we breathe in the thick morning air
Now I’ve seen what lies within you

Open your box
I’m here to look
Don’t be afraid

Open your mouth
I’m here to consume
I won’t speak

Open your hands
I’m here to touch
Feeling your vibrations

Open your eyes
I’m here to see
I see words unspoken

Open up to me
All you got, release it
I’ll catch the pieces that overflow

Open your heart
I’m here
Finally
Here

I’m not here to fix you
I’m into the real you

Don’t push me away
I’m not faking this

Stop slipping
See me gripping for you

Don’t hesitate
This is where you belong

Don’t run
I’ll be waiting when you’re done

Look at me
Unspoken words through my hazel eyes

Let me show you
What I can give to you

Believe in me
I’m all in

I’m all yours
I stand next to you
Holding your hand

I want this for us
Believe me when I say
I’m all in

I live for this
Living by your side
Believe in me

It’s not worship
Nothing worth labeling
It’s side by side

We share everything
Show me, tell me
Don’t let me down

I rest my head on your chest
Feeling for that heartbeat
Counting beats like raindrops

Do you feel me inside you?
Tell me
Are you ready for this?

I’m drawn by the light that radiates this room
I walk towards the source as my dress sways side to side
This open window displays a tiny view of your city

The sky is an ocean color blue with few clouds lingering
The tops of neighboring buildings dot my vision
I rest my swollen head in my balmy hand

I close my eyes
The eastern breeze kisses my blushing face
I want this moment to last

I’m not from here
Nor do belong to this land
But I can’t stay away from this radiance

I think about what just happened
Every movement we had
We’re the type to feel not speak

It’s hard for me to open up my chest
To show you the world I created
Dedicated to you and me

I’ll just stand here by the windowsill
Hoping you put your hands around my waist
And place your warm face next to mine

Instead, the warmth of the sun comforts me
Whispering secrets of the universe
Wish you could listen with me

As I turn back from the light
You stand there looking away from me
What-ifs will haunt me

My thoughts linger
Towards your light
How do I stop this?

I can’t and I won’t
Something inside me
Won’t let me

But will this last?
Tell me, am I good enough for this?
Am I good enough for you?

This discovery
Splitting me into unknown pieces
You eyeing me while I look to the other side

Stop making me feel
Like something is real between us
I feel you boy

And it hurts
I can’t fall for something
That I can’t keep forever

I should of known
I had this feeling
Closed eyed discussions

Your words flying past me
Simple short pleasures
Secret pain stayed

Just a flick of a switch
That darkness consumed me
And I’ll never see you again

I’ll never feel this way
****, I was just a curious soul
Who got lost in your little city of sin

That path you made
Sweeping away my footprints behind me
Will never exist again

I feel sorry for you
That ego takes charge of you
It stops you from glory

Stopping you from seeing
What you’re missing with me
Easy boy, easy with me

What’s going on
Everything was set in motion
Stars forming, planets spinning

We could of been a force
An asteroid set on its course
Taking aim to crash into something real

You chose to stop
A hand that pushed me away
Now I float away from you

I’m seeing colors everywhere
Galaxies filled with unknown objects
There’s hope out there

As I look back
You’re only a speck
Going off course

Yea, I’m good girl
You tell me that
You don’t know me

I go along with it
You play that rhythm as I groove
I make you think what you want

In reality, I’m watching
I’m eyeing your intentions
I’m reading your swift movements

You like this control
Feeling of ownership
You think you got something here

I see your lack of confidence
Hurts me to feel this for you
I’ll show you the real me

Let go of your ego boy
Let me show you
What’s in between good and bad

God knows that I fall quick
My body hits the soft ground
My soul lingers around me
My sharp eyes glide towards movement

I know, I crawled towards you
But all I saw was you
I was new to your world
You waved me in

I’ll never know your true intentions
Can’t waste time thinking
You held my spirit in your hands
Examining the light within

A child curious of it’s contents
Until finally you move on to a shiny new one
Tossed me back to the wild west
I have to relearn everything again

Please don’t turn back to see me
You won’t find me in that state
I’ll take what’s left of my light
And keep it in a safe place

Loving your words
Speaking to my soul
I know you felt it

Why don’t you open up to me
I’ll take it and cherish it
Trust me my love

It’s your mentality
That eastern ego edge
Mountains of self doubt

Your words cling to me
But your body opposes me
Wish I can swim in your mind

We both want to say it
But we can’t express
What lies beyond our thoughts

It’s a cruel concept
Can we break this?
I’ll go first…

You caught me with those words
Pieces of you sticking to me
Slowly falling off over time

You let me into your world
Whether real or fake
I’ll never know

Thought it would be more than just a day
A couple hours of leisure
I’m just a hopeless soul

I’ll give until I’m empty
Knowing that my destruction lies ahead
Hope holds my hand and won’t let go

I gotta be real with myself
This too will pass
I’ll keep this heart beating

Imagine an interstellar love
Fly you above all Earth’s layers
My touch will ignite your sun

The things I’ll show you
Make you visit ancient galaxies
I’ll guide your hands to create colorful nebulas

Here, blow this stardust towards me
Inhale an intoxicating dust cloud
Outline my body with your celestial hands

Let’s dance through the rings of Saturn
While tiptoeing over Jupiter’s red spot
I’ll squeeze your hand as we watch stars collide

Let’s ride a comet to visit my friend Andromeda
Hold on to me tight while we dodge angry asteroids
Watch the beginning of time through my Scorpio moon eyes

I’ll giggle as we kiss near Pluto’s cold heart
We’ll quietly steal Orion’s belt
Tie it between us as we approach the red planet

A time traveling blue box zips past us
We return to our purple love dust
We hold each other as we drift into soft sleep

There are no boundaries out here
It’s you and me exploring the outer edges
Imagine our interstellar love