I have an overwhelming feeling to disappear.
However, not permenantly.
I want to drop all communication.
All socialization.
Until I'm not so scared.
I always disappear when I feel unwanted.
Then I come back once I've come to my sense.
I run away from my problems.
There's my confession of the day.
I run away.
I so terribly want to run.
Though I know that unwise.
I spiral into even darker mindsets when I'm alone.
I barely survive when I'm alone.
So why does disappearing...
Why does running...
Why does being alone sound so amazing?

Two little hands, two little feet
two hearts beat inside of me.
Ten fingers, ten toes
who will you be God only knows.
I pray you'll have a smart mind.
I pray you will treat people kind.
All I know for sure is little one you
are mine.
I pray when I grow old,
you will remember what you where told.
I can't wait until it is you I can hold.
I will teach you all you need to know.
I will watch you play and grow, happily.
I can hardly wait for the day, that it is you I will first see.
Your mommy I will always be.

I can't seem to understand
I don't comprehend
How do 'those people'
Get ahead in the end?
We're taught to be considerate
We're taught to be understanding
But they still succeed
Without so much of an inkling.
Everyone likes a badass
Because they defy the rules
But how can the so-called 'nice' people
Feel attraction for those fools?
It seems unfair
It doesn't feel right
But at the end of the day
I guess ***** is might.

Can you put me out of my misery?

With each waking moment i fall deeper and deeper, can you put me out of my misery?

With every false embrace and changing light, can you put me out of my misery?

With ever godless day and infernal night, can you put me out of my misery?

With my shelter collapsing  and my fears coming near can you put me out of my misery?

With one fatal sweep, can it be over?
With one quick action can this end?
With one ******* instant can everything just be gone...

Why wont you put me out of my misery?
Why?

Why must i go on with this misery?
Why must my sole be bound to these mortal woes?

Why?

Why...

Oh where did I go?
"What a shame!"
They'd all say as I'd sit
Waving my white flag
"I hope you feel better!"
One always blurts out
With eyes of pity and curiosity
Creeping over my being
What a terribly awful gesture
You see I too hope I'll feel better
Oh but please tell me
How can one do so
When all that surrounds are onlookers