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Because ankles are bound to get hot
In underwear collars why not
Raise up the stall door,
To ventilate more?
You’ll feel like you’re on board a yacht.
A little bit of ***** humor.  People from other countries often complain about American bathroom stalls.
Hospitable airport motels serve
Continental breakfast.  It takes nerve
To think some continent
Serves food not fit for Lent.  
Are stale corn flakes what their guests deserve?
A diuretic’s the best juice
To glug before those long commutes.  
If coffee makes you ***
That is a paltry fee
For the elation it’s produced.
Because winter days aren’t short enough
To bruise our moods, already rough,
We make them shorter still
And by our own free will.
So if you’re glum and grouchy, tough!
Because even a long summer day
Isn’t long enough to harvest hay.
We modern folk must lose
A lovely hour to snooze
Or botch our Sunday reveillé.
When things go wrong I like to whine.  
Complaining’s free and feels so fine.  
So when I do find fault,
It’s moaning I exalt.  
Sip vinegar instead of wine.
All gargoyles scowl. What is the matter?
These faces will not make things better.  
But gargoyles always scowl
Because their haunches howl,
And slipping off their ledge will shatter.
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