I want to scream
I want to cry,
And I hate to admit it,
But I want to die.
I  want to stop this constant hurt
To stop the voices in my head
To never again get out of bed
To stop cutting up my skin
Like it's paper
The blade is a pen
But I am an artist
And I can't quit
Every cut a step closer
To finishing my artwork
And once I finish
The lines soon fade
Till little white lines
Are all that remain
And if I make a mistake
I cut and cut
Till blood covers up
Anything that I made
And then i'll start over
Onto a clean slate
And when the lines heal
I'll trace them sometimes
Remembering the story
That lays behind each line.

I need to be alone.
Alone enough to think,
Alone enough to wonder,
About things that are not meant for me.

I come off as strong,
But maybe i fall asleep crying.

I act like nothing is wrong,
But maybe i'm just really good at lying.

I suppose
I love my scars
Because
They have
Been with me
Longer than
Most people
Have.

You said that you loved me.
You said that you cared.
But once you were gone,
I was so very scared.

My breathing is shallow
The air is too thin.
The demons are screaming
I think they might win.

My vision is blurry
My heart rate is slow.
No therapy can help me,
I think i'm letting go.

Mirror, mirror on the wall
Was i always meant to fall?
Roses white, and dying light
Silver's sweet forgiving bite.
He'll ask, "Why?"
No answers will be found.
And I will be rotting
Beneath the ground.