“Just relax”

She says, as I picture her kissing the
Neck of a female coworker
With whom she had recently started
A flirtatious friendship

“We’ll play it by ear”

Scratches on the cluttered chalkboard
That is my anxious mind
Riddled with equations of what ifs
And ramblings of aftermaths

“It’ll work out”

Isn’t as reassuring as it might seem
When I want nothing more than to witness a fantasy
That is scribbled in a weekly calendar
And only committed to by word of mouth

“what else could I say”

Is a fair point,
but one that falls silent on my lust
which seems to be manifesting as a smoky devil
with obsessive compulsive disorder

“And if it doesn’t happen, oh well”

Are easy words for her to say
Considering the amount of fantasies she has fulfilled
Since we have started this journey
Of debauchery, and self-esteem adjustments

“At least we have each other”

The most comforting thing she has said on the topic,
Yet I wonder
Am I enough for you…

And you for me?