You left, my world stopped spinning,
Piece by piece fell apart,
You took everything beautiful inside me,
The one thing spared was what remained of my broken heart.
I did not remember how to breathe
Without your presence a part of my life,
You stabbed me in the back hard,
You could not even find the knife.
While I lay bleeding out on the floor
From the wound you inflicted,
Saw you from a different angle,
My whole point of view shifted.
I realized you were wrong,
You should not have done what you did,
When faced with your actions,
A coward, you ran and hid.
I watched you walk away from our love,
Not once did you turn back around,
I listened for your voice calling to me,
All I heard; echoes of your footsteps on the ground.
When the fading echoes died,
Part of me died too,
The rest of my happiness,
You decided belonged to you.
For a long time my body was empty,
Simply molecules and silent air,
If you would have looked inside,
Nothing significant was there.
I held myself together,
Managed a thin layer of illusion,
Underneath the flawless surface,
Was drowning in confusion.
I figured it out eventually,
Learned how to survive,
Even though I was living,
I wasn't actually alive.
I pushed the memories away,
Buried in a box,
So deep inside my head,
They would never reach waking thoughts.
I let you back into my life,
That was a mistake,
Because now I am remembering
Promises you swore not to break.
Words I believed were real,
Kisses that gave me wings to fly,
Days I wished could last forever,
The agonizing moment you said goodbye.
Images come stampeding in,
Making it hard to see clear,
When the dust settles over the past,
I'm sure I will be the only one here.
Written 8-11-11