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I see you.
 
Lying there just a few
feet from me, the
malaphor of us, derisive, mocking,
screaming at me from
the air above our heads,
the same air that lies heavy

pregnant

with all of the things we've
said to each other in this room

but you
don't see this

I glance at the curve of your hip
I question my resolve
I check and recheck my mental
list of how far I'm willing to
compromise and if it would be worth it

but you
don't feel this

I kissed your forehead, you took my hand;

you wouldn't let go.  I sat there and
gently caressed your arm, wanting only
to hold you, but you have poisoned
yourself tonight and it would be wrong.

You fell asleep, and still held on to my hand.

I sat with you a moment longer, smiling and silently weeping at the same time.

You wouldn't let me leave yet again,
even in your sleep.

In the light we can be seen.

The darkness is safe, so I still hold your hand.

This is a love song;

This is a requiem.
Insomnia and anxiety are leading me on this particular journey.  Feel free to give all the criticism you'd like.  I am out of practice, hell I'm not even sure why I am doing this.
Breanna evans Jan 2019
raindrops crash across the tin roof

while her mouth issues sweet, soothing music

and the cars pass slowly
...to my ears, at least
Ally Sep 2015
I know I am not allowed to love you anymore
You're not mine and I'm not yours
But the distance is killing me

I haven't been eating much recently,
It's showing in my face.
I look as empty as you left me.

I love you still,
I probably always will
But we aren't eachothers anymore.
Ally Sep 2015
I'll never forget the night we were sprawled on your bed,
Hand in hand and legs intertwined.
I asked you if you loved me and you said
"Like nothing else in the world"
You asked the same and I said
"More than myself."

Its been almost two years since then and now we lay close but never quite touching.
Never quite enough.
I asked you if you loved me and all you said was
"Yeah."
But you never asked me back,
And I've always wondered why that was.

I guess it was because we both already knew the answer, we were just so afraid to hear it out loud.
I don't love myself as much as I should but I think I love you even less.
Ally Sep 2015
Are you tired of holding the weight of the world on your fragile shoulders?
Somewhere along the way I saw the smile fade from your heart shaped face and soon be replaced with grimace.
You aren't happy, but you're not sure when it got on the next train and fled.
You know you're broken but you're convinced bandaids will hold your shattered bones together.
Neither am i
Ally Aug 2015
Let's pretend to be alive
We'll dance in the streets until three in the morning and kiss in the rain
They never look empty inside in the movies
So we'll reenact your favorite love stories and pretend we'd die for eachother
We don't have to admit we're already dead on our own
We can fake this love if we are anyone but ourselves
Ally Aug 2015
"Do you love me?"
His face lit up by the blinking lights on his alarm clock, he answers yes.
"Are you in love with me?" I ask, counting as every second goes by in the reflection in his eye.
15 seconds. "Aren't they the same thing?"
Ally Aug 2015
The emptiness I feel inside is nothing but a crater I stumbled upon one afternoon
I had been waltzing my way through the wild
Suddenly I was so deep I could barely see out and I watched as all the dancers gracefully moved around the brim.
I wasn't jealous of the way they moved right above me, still breathing.
I wasn't scared that I wasnt,
I was simply a crater.
I still am
Ally Aug 2015
You were as yellow as the sun
So bright it hurt to stare directly at you
Full of flowers and the smell of spring

I was as blue as the sea
Strong enough to bring you down with a single motion
But unable to stop myself

We didn't mix and make green
Instead I turned darker and so did you

I was waging wars on myself
And I can't thank you enough for trying to dull the pain
But I liked you better when you were yellow

I know it makes me a terrible person to wish you gone but you shined so much brighter in the sun.
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