It's never clear to me where the dreams begin and where the memories begin but I know they both begin to make sense after the first dozen times and then once they make sense they cease to be interesting and begin to bore me and so I focus on waking up to both and setting both feet on the cold stone floor where the **** and the puke has already dripped through the cracks left by the dance and have left a dry yellow stain just so I know for sure I'm home and not still in the in between domain. And I try to recall the detail but fail again, so I start a new story where I'm the hero and not a victim this time and where there's no need for heroes cos everyone is in a cooperative mood which makes me mad - what's the point of a hero when there's no heroism called for - which makes me wonder who called me here at this time of the night when crows and bulldogs are the only ones awake and the only creatures who care about the size of the moon, oh and me of course, so what's that make me, some cross between a black arts symbol and a patriot looking for a fight to justify the distrust and anger I feel about the world - blast and ******, I need a *** and I need to puke so I lay back down, curl into my fetal and let nature do it's worse. The warmth sooths me for a while, but soon enough the chill takes hold and I wonder when mum will come and tell me it's time for school. The answer is exactly 30 seconds later - and as usual she notices nothing, so imagination it is then - not such a blessing despite what the poet said.
Stream of consciousness the tutor said. Let your imagination loose she said. Okay. There we have it.
I lost faith, hope and sleep. My soul has awakened my REM (RAPID EYE MOVEMENT), Where everything becomes a lucid dream This is where the terror begins. Aware, Inhuman visions begin, The shadows come close to me Whispering my name, I see a figure, He tries to steal my soul, My body unable to move, Panic begins to set in, Unable to breathe, I try focusing in my getaway. "Wake up" I try to wriggle my toes. In last despair, I try to use the trump to my only salvation. The phrase that kills all evil presences. "Jesus blood has power" That's when he screamed like there was no tomorrow, A scary loud shout, I've never heard anything like it. It seemed like it was falling apart. I just woke up. Since that day I began to believe in Jesus and his power.