When I wiggle, wiggle wiggle,
People giggle, giggle, giggle.
In the middle, middle, middle,
I'm not so little, little, little.
When I jump, jump, jump,
My big old ****, ****, ****,
My rear end ****, ****, ****,
Goes bump, bump, bump.

Once skinny as a rail
I’m more like a whale.
Because of what I did
Ever since I was a kid.
Any old kind of candy
To me was simply dandy.
Follow me around and
I’d eat it by the pound.

Mom would bake, bake, bake.
By belly would shake, shake shake.
I couldn’t flounce, flounce, flounce
My gut would bounce, bounce, bounce.
Now I’m round, round, round,
To the ground, ground, ground.
I eat just like a pig, pig, pig,
That’s why I’m so big, big, big.

Once skinny as a rail
I’m more like a whale.
Because of what I did
Ever since I was a kid.
Any old kind of candy
To me was simply dandy.
Follow me around and
I’d eat it by the pound.

When some say diet, diet, diet,
I reply to them quiet, quiet, quiet.
Every time I try it, try it, try it.
My body doesn’t buy it, buy it, buy it.
So i just live for lunch, lunch, lunch.
I love to eat a bunch, bunch, bunch,
And I have a basic hunch, hunch, hunch,
The same will go for brunch, brunch, brunch!

Government says
There's biscuits in your cupboard
But you can't have them
There's oven chips in your fridge
But you're not allowed those
There's a pie in your oven
But you shouldn't have that either
But here's an apple, they say
I'm allergic to apples
Here's a banana
Allergic to those, too
But you like blueberries
Yes.  I love blueberries
And you like Papaya
Yes
And Mango
Yes, I love all of those things
Then why don't you have one
I will
When?
When I've won the lottery
Why can't you eat them now
Because...Em.
Capitalism

your brain is obese
it's 60 percent fat
and a quarter of that mess
is cholesterol -  and that's bad
like everyone's brain
although I have to ad
mine is 40 percent lean
so I can sell you my diet
of raw fish.. lentils.. beans
and the wisdom of this poet
on his fast track brain train
a thin title to start...
“How Can I Be So Mean?”

I know I shouldn't
But I must
The craving
It is just too much
The taste of sugar on my tongue
All I need is just one
To feed my desire
To fuel my fire
A little taste of chocolate
To send me on a tasty rocket
Maybe a spoon of caramel
It won't be very harmful
And a perfect little cookie
To make me a diet rookie
Just a taste
Just a lick
Anything to make me tick
So who cares, if I'm on a diet

No
Not again
No more laughs
And painful attacks
No more hurting
And friend deserting
It's not worth it
If he won't love me a bit
Not with every thing I have eaten
It's not worth being beaten
By me
Because he doesn't love the way everyone will see
No more sugar
No more sweets
Only vegetables
And green beans
But the taste
No
But the smell
No
But the emptiness, I just can't quell
Oh well
Diets are for losers anyway
Like me