Sometimes I really do feel like an alien in my own skin,
Like I could twist and turn, transform and try,
All the years of my life and still not get it right.
I don't know who made it that way.
Couldn't tell you where the notion developed,
Or who proved to be truth before I did.
I don't know which artist created this outline,
Sketched it in ink, and entitled it a lifestyle -
One I once dared not color outside the lines of.

But I figure, if I cannot be a Mona Lisa of a painting,
I could be a more original, less world reknown piece
Because the regard of outside perspectives is less important
Than the quality of art produced in me.
Maybe I've been too focused on the colors already on the palette,
Instead of the mountains of shades I could imagine.
Maybe the skin I wear is black, like mourning, like darkness,
But these shadows make it possible to appreciate light.
Maybe the issue isn't me. Maybe I just need a new canvas,
One that resembles my possibilities and not my limitations.
One that allows room for breath, and exploration, and mistakes -
That isn't stifled with labels, or schemes, or systems.
And maybe I have to create that for myself.

Sometimes, I really do feel like an alien in my own skin,
But that doesn't make it any less mine,
Nor any less worthy of love.
And maybe I can love this martian without having all the answers,
Or even a planet or plane to belong to.
Maybe the person behind the pen, or pencil, or paintbrush, is me,
If I decide to be.

I fear not battle, nor trial or journey,
I fear not mountains, nor plains or valleys,
I fear not enemy, nor entity or inner me,
I fear not stillness, nor silence or serenity.
I fear no man, no woman, no deity,
I fear no concept, nor idea in it's ambiguity,
I fear no system, religion or theory,
Fear no oppressor, no judge, no jury.
I fear no place, no time, no state of being,
I fear no vengeance, no riots, no villian's besieging,
I am no victim, no village pillaged,  
I will not put forth entreaty;  
Nor will I beseech thee pardon.

I need not, for my cup never empties,
And blessed be,
I am who I'm meant to be,
I am who I'm going to be,
I am where I'm supposed to be,
And nothing can dissuade me.
My course is set in stone,
Universe paved path of growing,
Story already written, unfolding,
I bear witness, only...

Is it the height of ingratitude then,
To be in constant pursuit of better?
A continuous desire, an inherent yearning for more?
Are we all gluttons then,
Ungrateful and hungry,
A river of wanting,
Never still, never present,
Never content?
Fulfilled by materialism and superficial comfort,
We are swayed by the yearnings of the flesh,
Is this sin, then?
To want to live, truly live,
Before falling prey to death?
Are these experiences fated to forever be out of grasp,
Held above heads and beyond reach?

An impossible prize,
Is it?
A better life?

like beaches flow into river sides,
you can follow me anytime.
like masculine & feminine join ties
to conquer time
& cover tracks,
mixed up in lines of no shame.
=
eternal interplay,
at this stage of the game.
what's waiting for us?
how much time do we have?
is this just for now
or forever?
=
use words to empower,
go up hill & seek stillness,
everyday.
its apart of the journey.

credit is due,
years go by
& through the grace of whatever god takes credit
for my levels of super intelligence,
imagination takes me far to distant worlds.
-
charge your chakras & your crystals by the light,
feed your shadows in the darkness of the neigh
drawing near to your sun sign.
& sunshine will forever bring you purity.
-
how long is forever?
what tools do you measure?
what jewels do you treasure
in your chest?
near your heart source,
atleast try to keep your heart pure,
atleast the reward is much greater than the process.
-
lets try to measure progress by visual appearance,
find yourself in midst of forest,
seeking clarity & clearance
or your presence
or your pretence becomes you.
-
or your visuals become you
like your tongue is heavy & hold weight,
like whatever you say must pass through
pop filters,
& your sway is a simple dance to your own beat.
-
what level of comprehension?
how might you even see from the outside looking in?
remember,
judgement falls back onto the same soil.

does a door have a lock?
are the walls even up
or high enough to comprehend what's beyond?
is anyone up there?
-
intertwining,
like healthy attachment;
mind seems empty handed yet still full continually.
who needs love anyway?
what is love anyway?
does love will to ease the tension,
where do words come in question?
-
run on sentences paint never ending stories of mine;
where i contemplate lines,
go out of mind,
& far enough in time to keep me vibin' high atleast...
-
i keep secrets far enough to keep me center,
i dont keep secrets more than anyone keeps guard.
whatever coin i flip,
im in process of aligning to destiny,
no questions
& if i question then that question is but an idea.

why do you always look mad?
like the world let you down
then led you down roads that end dead.
-
your dull expression;
it makes me question what goes on within you,
is it eating you away?
will you go or will you stay?