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Turned 29 yesterday,
Celebrating on my own
For the very first time
I made arrangements
for myself
With balloons, songs
and a yummy cake!
And with all these,
I realized,
I can love myself too!

Despite the
love-hate relationship
with my own self,
I owe my body and soul!
They have been through a lot
From the self harm
in every possible way
To the
low phases
and pitfalls.
And I feel grateful
that I am still alive

With so much more of wisdom
Through the journey of life
Every changing as a whole
From happiness,
joyfulness, escasty,
And love -
To the
trauma's, loss,
heartbreaks, failures
Loneliness and depression!

I am now learning
to be on my own
From distraction and noises
all around
To shifting focus to oneself!

And with all of these,
Now Murphy's law
makes much more sense!

And now
With a the shifts of focus
I know that somehow
I can contribute
to this vast world too!
The support which I keep getting from God and all around immense and I am equally grateful for this life no matter how much it hurts!
~Christi Michaels~January 2015~

painful to sleep next to your beloved
unaware that you are there
restless do I slumber
so close to one
seems not to care

wide space exists between
years stiched together loosely now
memories the only treasure
I dare hold close and how...

time once filled with wonder
precious lives did we create
                 joy and sadness                 
in all that we have made

vows binding and forever
sacred words embewed with trust
committments from so long ago
amidst powerful love n' lust

holding space together
believing in return
of all that was held sacred
legacy rightly earned

Oh, my heart it wanders through
our years of time and space
how I miss your flush of smile...
loving gaze upon my face


Copyright © 2015 Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved.
restless do I slumber

— The End —