I feel like I am
Many different people
At many different times
And right now
I am someone who
Wants to hurt others
And not give a ****
About the consequences

Cool mist
Hits my pale face
I'm cold
"I know" she says
"I'm indecent" I say
She takes off her blouse
Button after button
It was endless
I could watch her remove her blouse
Forever
The fog filled the air
I heard a dog bark in the distance
I could see street lights
And her
Street lights
And her
And her

They say they understand
But they don't
Emotions built up inside me
Like an overflowing cup
Things falling out,
But
Things left inside

I need to stop thinking
You can save me
I am so mad at myself
For thinking you could
For so **** long
I realize life isn't about being saved
Or saving another
Just love and maybe be loved in return
Because all I really need
Is someone to kiss my knuckles
After I create a hole in the wall

******* be wild
You sit in that room all day
You've never been drunk
You say that I always smell like cigarettes
You always smell like regret
You make me boring

I don't dream about you
You always say
"I dreamt of you again"
And I can never say the same
Because you are never on my mind
And I am so sorry
She is always on my mind
You are just here
And she is not

Its as if there is a vice grip
On my heart
And every time you kiss me
It squeezes me harder and harder
I feel stuck and safe
You're constantly there
Around my heart
And you know the power you hold
You know I am
As needy as an infant
As a senile old woman
As a *******
I need you to constantly tell me
"I love you I love you"
So I know you won't leave me
And if you do
I can hold that against you
That you love me
And my constant needing pushes you away
And I am just sorry that I am like this

Line by line
I dissect you
Embrace your mind
Pick at your soul
Your dark past
Your changing present
Your beautiful flaws
Your regrets
I am trying to learn
Each crevice of your eye lid
Each stretch mark on your side
Every freckle and bump
And current bruise
And when I think I know it all
That's not possible
I'll never know enough about you