Maybe it’s that you don’t understand how you feel about him,
that would be a lie.
Because the last thing you want to do is understand.
You want to say you don’t love him anymore,
you’re not in love like you were before.
You want to think that
the beginning is all that you miss.
Your friends, they would call him terrible,
they didn’t realize you were terrible to him too.
The fault wasn’t in your stars,
The fault was that your stars were too close
and even stars have a habit of devouring.
That’s all there is
to you,
to him
that’s all there is.
Because near the end
you had started becoming closer.
He showed his ugly sides to you
there is no lie in that,
but you loved him
with your fangs bared to attack,
and you were just as harsh, if not more
but he loved you.
He probably still does,
but now you love each other like people yearn to see ghosts.
Even though your love sounds painful
all you both could ever see
was the light in the other.
The sun reflecting off his cheekbones
as it turns your eyes the shade of brown that made him wonder
oh god, how lucky are we
for we were in love.
Now it’s become a misty memory,
it’s the days when you look at your guitar
and remember that the last hands to touch it were his
and then you’re terrified.
Touching the guitar,
might make your fingerprints overlap with his,
and that simple thought
leaves you lost
in the mist.