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Cynthia Aug 2019
I lay in bed, missing you
and place my hand where you used to lay.
Without you here, I'm lost inside
my heart knows only pain.

There was a time where I would cry
and turn to use your shoulder.
But now I share you with the country,
because you are a soldier.

You may defend the greater good,
and always fight for what is right;
I will share you with the world,
but your heart is still mine.
Cynthia Jul 2019
Your words echo in my mind
and flow through my body at high tides.
"You will be safe, and we will be happy"
We kissed and you said goodbye to me.
For three months, we didn't see each other.
You became what my heart longed most for.
My letters to you were stained with tears,
three months felt like years.
Hidden emotions became magnified,
my love for you was stronger than I had realized.
We finally got to kiss just one more time,
before, again, we said goodbye.
Cynthia May 2019
Dear me,
I write to you to say goodbye.
This life is gone, no need to cry.
It's okay, you won't be missed;
whatever you're feeling will be dismissed.
We have no one to tell
except for ourselves,
what pain we've endured
behind closed doors.
I wish I could say it will be alright,
but I'm afraid this is our last fight.
goodbye,
sincerely,
me
Cynthia May 2019
I wish I could feel
with this empty heart.
In search for love,
I've torn it apart.
In these hands,
the colour leaks.
and in my soul
I hear death speak.
Cynthia Mar 2019
I don't feel special,
I'm not unique.
I want to cry
but I can't even speak.
My hands reach out,
but they cannot hold
a single thing
but the bitter cold.
Everything's frozen,
I feel lost.
Even my tears
have turned to frost.
When I cut my waist
it bleeds black.
I'm so deeply gone
there's no way back.
This is goodbye
Cynthia Feb 2019
My heart leaks through my fingertips
and drips onto the page.
There is pain, hurt and there is despair,
I can't put on a pretty face.

When I was trapped in the ground,
he made it feel like I could fly.
But his love is different,
because it came with a price.

Soon I learned that flying...
it's impossible.
An ugly truth hid behind a gorgeous lie.
We weren't indecomposable.

Black liquid flows from my eyes,
I remember when they were clear.
But when I look in the mirror,
the worst has come - I fear.

Though everything feels dead,
I am still alive.
My soul feels like it's burning.
This is what it means
to die inside.
Cynthia Feb 2019
There are mountains on my back,
and it hurts like hell to carry them.
I was supposed to only climb...
but I never really was one for climbing.
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