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When I am SITTING doing NOTHING
I thinks of my son who had left me void,

When I am WALKING alone in street
I remember my son and time well spent,

When I am COOKING I feel guilty of leaving my son alone at times,

My son who was special
My son who was dependent on me,
My son who left me early.

My son,
For some doctors he was classic example VEGETABLE,
For others he was point of research,
They told her so point blank on my face,
He will not live beyond 10 or 11,
he passed at 11&1/2...!


My son, whose passing away,
I could not grieve..
Coz,
he was a LIBERATED SOUL..
I held back my tears
To CELEBRATE his LIFE,
I held back my tears to
HAIL his NEW LIFE.
At times when I am
DOING NOTHING
I spend my time
RETROSPECTING....!!!

When people see me DOING NOTHING,
They call me NAMES,

LAZY for some
FREE for some
HAPPY for some
LIBERATED for some
INDEPENDENT for some
LUCKY for some....!!!
Coz'
to cry my heart out
is not just me...!

I FEEL LIKE ASKING -
Do they see ME
-
Shopping,
Watching movies
Enjoying parties
Laughing
Gossiping...
???

When I do nothing,
Let me be,
Let me be in memory of my son...
My mind needs no DISTRACTION,
My body needs no REPAIRS,
My face needs no FACIALS,
My hair needs no MASSAGING...!

I am fine by myself
LET ME BE...!!!

Sparkle In Wisdom
22/1/2019
Dedicated to all mom s who have born special kids.
Love me
with
your quivering eyes
crack my perception
dazzle my heart
O
Arabian beauty!
save me
save me
from my restless youth

with napping world
I look at everything
like a utopia
Now
your cute love
twisted
like a knife
rolling hills
sizzling sand dunes
bonding
into an Arabian night
O Jasmine my princess
silken tresses
bonfiring
furious fire
breathe in
keep kissing
don't stop
please show me crying eyes
crush my heart
torment me
give me all your burden
purely control me
no walls
let's try to fly
like a Cinderella love
I am finished with you

torque of love
so high
out of control
loaded gun
just try it

**** me
with your
self-delight


with
your naked eyes
jump off the roof
O jasmine! come back to me
into the heavens abode
and
torture my lies
unhinged me with truth
I don't want to be normal
free me
capture me

give
me
plethora of love
till the night candle burn
tremoring void
with your dew's drop
I sense complete roses,
though you carry
daggers in your heart
like an invisible belonging
mirroring me in a  mirror
tired  footsteps unreward
crying the burden of emptiness
fragile figure
what a void  life
lost expectation
diminished potential
to live without you every day is a boring task
at last
A
shattering mirror
blade smiling
in your beautiful venomous peninsula
I am not in pain O dear!
comfort me with
your sweet
darkness

I have mocked my own path many times
Do you know?
you don't know

now I keep
running
running
running
away from reality

as if

death is incredible
but not as life

biting time
everyday
I wake up
and
going
into the quest
of nowhere

retrospecting
recollections
and a gulp of sorrows
I turned my own look back
ecstasy doesn't last
happiness lost
within a second
without her

and a
whispering
screams
river reverberating
my mind
over and over

life is nothing
I don't mean to her
hoping for the day
I will come out of my depression

without her
there is no one
nothing to me

red nails
long fingers
I said lightly to her
let's dive from sky high
and breathe out
diving from sky high
water is cold
depression kissing
bubbling
stop
...
into the heaven
I am looking at you in the mirror
the reality changed, so was I
like an unhinged wild shadows
a hollow soul
I elope
you remain
like a curious beauty
never identified by those who don't assume
cheers!!!
Listen to Daggers and Roses! O my princess by ravindra nayak #np on #SoundCloud
https://soundcloud.com/ravindra-nayak-970252356/daggers-and-roses-o-my
Deep May 2019
Always, think of me, when the moon looks lone and pale
Nebulously sprinting for empty space —
And you sitting under starry universe
Watching those nocturnal games,
Retrospecting life before which many stooped.
Stop not there for the life is long and trials many,
Tribulations its essence, success sneer without them.

Always, think of me, when the moon is lone and pale
gasping wildly for empty space—
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2017
i've never been really given an incentive
to compete with fellow men,
all that i have been given is
a cosmopolitan questionnaire girl,
and, that's a prize worth fighting for?
i can't compete for that -
even fake gold plastic souvenirs seem
more the setting standard worth
of competition -
   and in this retrospecting masculinity,
i am bound, with either hands tied
behind my back, or folded into a straitjacket.
it always happens when you bypass
chemistry...
   how on earth, did gravity become translated
into biology, of gender "centrism" -
this bypassing of copernican antics
is a snail's worth of sleep: the two steps
forward, and the 3 steps back...
when physical laws enter the biological
realm: you have problems...
to be honest? 20th century communism
doesn't seem that idiotic, or menacing...
given 21st "communism"...
we've turned full circle,
   given the original counter "argument",
namely that of heliocentrism &
geocentrism...
  the, the earth orbits around the sun,
vs. the earth is at the centre of the universe...
we've made it! we've made it!
people! people of this world, we've made it!
we just reinvented the ******* wheel!
full-swing back into a speeding snowball
momentum!
     talk of gravity in the realm of biology
is one thing... but to call it anything else
will always feel like: a blast from the past.
rotten ****-stormers and fudge-packing
leprechauns: those tidy ginger macaques...
ooh! and a face worth a million trips to kenya...
just for the giggles.
   baboons? natural thieves and havoc instigators:
better still, watch a baboon try to sit
on its protruding ***, donning hemorrhoid...
sorry eddie izzard, sorry lee evans,
you can't beat that;
but we are a return to the pre-enlightenment
period of human "endeavours"...
    evidently if we provide the technological
ultra+, we also have the counterbalance of
having to dumb down...
      please! please! can i hear the applause?!
gynocentrism = heliocentrism...
         homocentrism = geocentrism
,
although that's deceptively paradoxical -
given the cosmological proof -
namely? man as vector, woman as coordinate...
yes yes, i know the "vector" is in a fixed
orbit, besides the point...
      it's an intuitive claim of the current status quo -
"mother nature" has become obsolete,
   in terms of orientation -
    esp. in terms of orientating men -
i just call her: that exhausted *****
          who's been ******* over 7+ times a day...
i see that homocentrism isn't even a term
appropriated by the orthodox standards of
the church of the oxford dictionary,
that doesn't matter, much of english compounding
of words isn't approved anyway,
given the buffer zone of the utility of hyphen,
counter-measure to genesis of complex
        genesis packaging akin to german -
polysilbeformulierung, sad? no, just true:
remnants of which remain in origin saxon
(yes, not originally) - like to mix the timings;
even i am not certain whether i wrote
the sequence down correctly,
i.e.
   gynocentrism = heliocentrism...
         homocentrism = geocentrism
,
but as all counter-intuitive observations,
i, as many more men before me,
am plagued by doubts,
       which counter-intuition provides -
but unlike writing 2 + 2 = 5, rather than 4 -
i have the worth of time to instill a gradual
precipitation of conviction,
   that, if not grasping a billionth heart
that might state the same,
    will forever reside in a "body" of the thing
transformed into dust: the potent residue
of original spontaneity:
nonetheless, modern man has reinvented
a world, prior to the copernican observation,
for it has, relegated gravity from physics,
bypassing chemistry, and invoking it into
biological "debates"...
   shambles: total, ample and absolute shambles;
of such quests, i will not speak with enough
respect, as to be someone in the future
to craft a telescope... evidently looking
at genital members doesn't require either
telescope or microscope...
       just enough *** and rhetorical ridicule:
because, THIS IS WHEN, THE MADMEN ESCAPE
THE ASYLUM, AND FORCE OTHERS TO
ADHERE TO THEIR INSANITY...
       AND THIS, IS WHEN THE SANE ARE
BROUGHT TO KNEEL, BEFORE A STATUE
OF A, BERSERKER.
didn't slept whole night ...
Like a sorry figure
of
mind and heart retrospecting...

Hell and heaven
Like an earthquake in brain
Raining

Seeds of darkness
Reflecting
Negative vibs


Seeds of light
Reflecting
Positive vibs

Fear and anxiety
Surprising

A lake near the forest beauty
Mist nudge
Midge
...
Half moon
Walking

.
...

— The End —