Upon Googling Petco
regarding purchasing gift card
for eldest daughter
(she tends two beautiful female felines)
Petsmart website appeared right and center
innocuously distracting purported intent.
The nearest latter named store
approximately a dozen plus miles away
whereas former specialty shop
in closer proximity to her,
she (first born offspring),
who resides within Oakland, California.
I readily admit envisioning
gamut of goodies
(to enhance Felis catus existence),
whence yours truly
easily self hypnotized himself
into catatonic trance
while drooling over plethora of
goodies to accessorize pet life.
Alumni school of hard knocks
learned forty dollar life lesson
(twenty smackaroos allotted
each competing purveyor
of similar pet merchandise.
Website designers masterfully
employ machiavellian (cutthroat) tactics
to ****** up business
when an online shopper
scouting around for any product.
Businesses cater to shoppers
seeking any particular product
must activate, facilitate,
and integrate subterfuge
(obviously exercising subtle techniques)
to hoodwink savvy netizen
confidently kickstarting and buzzfeeding
insatiable pinteresting itsy bitsy
(spidery) prodigal son wannabe hankering
to splurge on themselves,
viz their pet peeve.
Even with earlier premeditated notion in mind
to secure gift card for Eden (said progeny),
predilection toward easy distraction
found me admitting aforementioned faux pas,
which spurs (Matthew Scott's)
quasi crazy corollary
subsequently stated thus,
when deliberate focus absent
obviously good n plenti (of fishy)
opportunities thrives affording advertisements
expedient modus operandi
to bandy, dangle, and features wares
eliciting, emancipating, enticing
yours truly, who drooled and slobbered
suddenly spurred with Pavlovian craving
to whip out debit card (whip it good)
and surrender sparse monies
to plunk down electronically x dollars,
whereby another citizen banker bit the dust.
Overzealous to feign
being monetarily gifted
faux lavishing self with impulse buying
justified as early Holiday,
(viz Xmas) shopping,
(no matter I suffer agoraphobia)
figuratively ran counter
to credo of frugal lifestyle.
Impossible mission
to wrench free and clear,
where penury indelibly
(albeit figuratively) writ large
across precarious teetering complex edifice
there's a sucker born every minute,
and ye espy the latest one freshly minted.