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Chris Slade Dec 2018
I’ve O’D’d on Glucosamine Sulphate, so much I’m mentally scarred.
It’s escalated now I’m 70… I’ve mainlined on my Senior Railcard…
I bow down to the Norse God Voltarol… He eases all my pains…
and there’s Deep Heat, Germaloids, even Anusol for the other stresses and strains.

The wondrous Winter Fuel Allowance! That’s what lights our lamp these dark days - ahh, those twilight hours!
But after the logs, it’s not Leccy or Gas we crave? No! We buy ***** with ours…
the Whisky, Gin, *****, Wine, a drop of Brandy too. It all helps us numb the cold
whilst memories of happier times gone by - brighten up this ****** growing old.

Supplements, sterols, statins, aspirin, beta blockers… All the heart meds - life’s a battle.
In the 60s it was *** and Drugs and Rock ’n’ Roll… Now there’s less *** and a lot more rattle!
****** fails to make it now - “no more”, after the last time - she said!
These days the only thing it does is stop me rolling out of bed!

The bus pass lets me roam the world… from John O’Groats to Land’s End.
But these days I travel locally Southwick, Lancing, Steyning; oh yeh and a cousin in far Gravesend.
Further afield; abroad perhaps? Well no…Back then it was Newhaven for the Continent.
But now I’m over 70, well, it’ll just be Worthing for the INCONTINENT!

And… did I say? Not that I was ever in the habit of measuring it you understand - or straightening out the kinks
I’m pretty sure that these days - and ’no’ it’s NOT just the cold… but, your once adequate **** - it shrinks!

I'm sorry...Your *******! It ain't so long!
First poem I read in public as a poetry ******... It went well enough for me to decide that I would do it again.
tomsout001 Mar 2013
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Johnny Noiπ Oct 2018
Out of darkness, and the sea and from the tears of the saints,
of the observance of the obligations in the day of the feast
for the aromatic ones, and the composition of the army
of the Lord of lords; the tap in the manner of the safety
of the vessels of change in the color of the birds eating beans, |||||
we cry, Abba! Neither will fall at last to fulfill the brakes.
UUA the umbrella of the President's wife will have beautiful legs!
Music is a burden on the music and the background
and focus on the background, and dry out the juice
of the body in voluntary actions of the body, and the colors of various
carried-out music in the knee, and of the church I saw a ****** in Asia,
too, and the second time, Jack Diamond,
brown, brown, brown to dark brown or a brown haired woman
up in the leaves and velvety, the Albanians in Greece,
and Alexander's heart, the European Newborn radio and television,
game or Russia and John's pole and eighty three books about
This is not true at last, that is a false message.
The second was that it should damage from Africa
and the United States lost the black cherries.
Invisible things at different levels. The blind and SSH.
In such cases, Rich, strong, conservative tradition. - new hair,
but not involved in the church's right track in China
in the first Hannah King Albert V. Haller (Statins).
2 large bags from the Italian weddings for the first time
in the game the ball is a small American provider;
T-Mary Flower shows the format of diet sodas to
high blood pressure with a glass ball or the temple dog's
big package, fatigue, malaise and high in Dystopialia
to buy parts and disorder the goaltender. :         Order,
that is absurd, since sugar changes.
ABCDEFGHJKLMNPQRSTUVW,
the consul general Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe
Women Women, [               ], [               ];
Women, Women, Women, Women's joy, joy,
joyful joy, wonderful, Joy Keithline is wonderful,
joy, joy, joy, Happiness, joy, Love and joy, joy, joy. Joy
all kinds of Popes, Paul, St. Paul, St. Paul, St. Paul,
St. Paul, St. Paul, St. Paul, brown, brown, brown,
brown, brown, brown hair of Paul Paul's Beard;
Grey Chevalier Lost poet Tomas Rubio;
Johann had a bad hair day, Fluffy, I've known all my life,
and the life of the new European Russia in Russian
coffee houses, and all the GQ faces - Webbed moon stars,
hearts, and the heart of Europe, the radio,
the Nirvana, the French,  the Russian,  the school
and the karma of the Ray Sutra of Paul, the heart
of playing these games which gives a thing of the planets,
the stars and the stars of providing radio
and television set to Santa Santa Clara;
Clare Crĕpĭto, the book of books and it has not fallen
to the Russian soldiers, but Christ is false.
Christ, which in pressing and urgent crises
worked in the United States and in Africa.
The invisible circuit. In the film?           The blind cannot see.
Light air. - Austria and the true Chinese home
covered in vines and branches in England,
led to a wave - Life 2 Ethics taste of soda's temple of the dog,
the dog, the dog, the dog, and the dog songs;
sound of the big dog, the dog, the dog, the dog
and the dog and the dog is a dog, a dog, a dog goes to church.
Julie Grenness Sep 2019
Arise in the pre-dawn hush,
Everything moves, ask the toilet brush,
Then a morning offering to God,
On with the routine I do plod,
I think to rise and smile,
And send each one positive vibes,
To my cyber buddies across the miles,
To my pen friends in the USA,
Hope you dodge hurricanes today,
Then it is breakfast time,
Compare our statins in a rhyme,
I have learnt this yet, you see,
Aging is really not for wussies!
Feedback welcome, have a laugh.
Once again I woke
though
not sure if I'm awake,
my head aches
my legs ache
She says
take a cure-all
by that
She means
Panadol,

I take a minute to think
did I drink last night?
no!
that's right,
I was working til ten
got home,
bellyflopped onto the bed
dead to the world.

..and more of the same today.

..but not all doom and gloom
I left some room to swing the cat
( not a euphemism )
They'll discover me in
the catacombs or
in some presbytery
playing dominoes
while
watching Tom and Jerry,

they're fans of mine
during cartoon time or
so I like to think.

They attend matins
I take statins
which is just my
reliance on science
and the medical fraternity.

Tom laughs with me
Jerry's a bit
standoffish,
at times
I wish I was.

If they do find me
I'll play hide and seek
with their minds
or Scrabble
whichever's
the easiest.
John F McCullagh Nov 2019
The table is set and the guests are arriving.
Tom Turkey is brown and your uncle's imbibing.
"Please pass the biscuits." my Aunt Edna said,
while blithely ignoring my drunk cousin Fred.
Don't talk about politics, Religion or Fate.
Don't wear a red hat; keep your eyes on your plate.
You can survive this; I'm certain you will.
Just pile your plate high and eat what you will.
There are six types of cake here and Nutella pie.
If you don't take your statins it is likely you'll die.
But should you survive and avoid your demise
We'll send you home weighed down with three kinds of pie.

You'll have gained fifteen pounds and you're not very tall-
The folks at Weight Watchers are expecting your call.
DENNY R ALLISON Mar 2022
In writing my poems, it's always my quest,
to take the time, to make it rhyme, but I'm in distress.
I wanted to convey, how much better I rest,
Since the purchase of a great mattress.
My problem you see after plenty of test, I bought a "Purple,"
and "Dang Me" the only thing I found to rhyme was, "Maple Surple."
One of the the worlds favorite pigments, after centuries of time,
has not a single word to which in can rhyme.
A color once held in history as the royal shade,
even now leaves this poet, his poem unmade.
A purple fruit, from which wine we could make,
And someone chose, to call it a "grape."
I say it's high time to correct, this to long slight,
And save the word "Purple" from it's unjust blight
How about you Auto Makers, with your Durango,Sienna, and Tesla.
Come up with a sporty "Verpule," if you wanna Impreza.
Hey, Disney you once rhymed, Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,
would doing "Purple" be so atrocious.
Big Pharma, with your colorful, zides, mycins, and statins,
maybe you can use an "urple" in your next covid patents.
You TikTok influencers I'm calling on you,
#Purplechallenge, together, let's see what we can do.
Well, I was really pumped, but now, I just sit here sad.
The Purple Company, sent a gift, an "ORANGE" mattress pad.
So now I pull out my ceremonial sword of "Silver,"
and commit this poem to: "Hari Kilver."
Thanks to the late and great "Roger Miller" for giving me the only rhyme I could find for purple.
Micheal Wolf Apr 2020
I'm past it now
I'm over the top
Just waiting for things to start falling off
More grey than brown
More wrinkles each day
I wasn't expecting to be this way
Cholesterol high and diet low
Statins to stop you from having a stroke
I thought I'd be watching the seasons pass in the arms of a traveler who walked my path
If it's three score and ten then i'm in the last quater and it ain't golden years as the magazine's sold you
A tablet for this and another for that and one for the side effects if your still using that!
So go make mistakes
Make many
Then more
That's the advice as now I'm old

— The End —